Some people think that a sense of competition in children should be encouraged. Others believe that children who are taught to co-operate rather than compete become more useful adults.
Discuss both these view and give your own opinion.
The methods of teaching for children are always the controversial issues. While some people claim that we enhance the competitive sense of children, others insist that we should teach them how to collaborate rather than compete. In my opinion, I strongly agree with the latter view.
Admittedly, it is undeniable that emulation is the motivation of the development. To specify, if children are competitive, they will make great effort and keep trying to improve themselves. Therefore, they will strengthen their knowledge and skill day by day to reach the top in the future. However, if children are too competitive, they will become selfish and self-important. Consequently, they will be not willing to share their good experience or knowledge and will not listen to other’s idea. For example, one of my old friends, Nam, who were so emulous, never listened to other’s comments, so that he never realized his weaknesses and mistakes. In a word, hardly could people achieve the success if they do in a way like my friend.
On the other hand, it is obvious that no one can be successful in the working place now by doing himself only. In every company or organization, teamwork skill is one of the most important skills that all the members should have. For example, in a project, we cannot execute all the steps and it is necessary to pull together with others for the common target. Hence, if children have an opportunity to learn about cooperating with each others, they will definitely obtain more chance to get a good job and develop their career. Moreover, cooperation is also the key leading to the success.
In conclusion, although collaboration is very important, we also should not prevent the sense of competition in children. The best way is to balance both competing and cooperating in the right way.
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Sentence: For example, one of my old friends, Nam, who were so emulous, never listened to other's comments, so that he never realized his weaknesses and mistakes.
Error: emulous Suggestion: No alternate word
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 7.0 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 1 2
No. of Sentences: 17 15
No. of Words: 305 350
No. of Characters: 1464 1500
No. of Different Words: 178 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.179 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.8 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.718 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 105 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 78 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 49 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 33 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 17.941 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.63 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.765 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.285 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.484 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.08 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5