Formal education tends to restrain our minds and spirits rather than set them free.Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and s

Essay topics:

Formal education tends to restrain our minds and spirits rather than set them free.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.

Submitted by saurbahk7 on Sun, 07/01/2018 - 16:40

The impact of education of minds of student is one of the most important topics that has recently come into light. Due to the debatable nature of this topic, we can find people supporting as well as refuting the statement. However, the extreme successes of college dropouts inclines me to believe that formal education does actually restrain our minds and spirits rather than set them free.
Knowledge is the most important tool any person can possess, and formal education has always focussed on improving the knowledge of the student. This surely helps the student to be aware of what is going on in the world and where the particular student stands. However all of this is done by designing a common curriculum for all the students. As it is known that not every student is equal, having a common curriculum may have some adverse effect on the imagination and thinking of student. As the story goes that, if you judge an elephant by its ability to climb a tree and judge a fish by its ability to run, they would always believe that they are stupid. Similarly constricting a particular student to a syllabus which is common to all may force a student to do things that he might not be actually good at or interested in. Secondly,the limited scope of the curriculum can cut the wings of freedom that a student can develop by setting his mind free.
With people like Bill Gates, Steve Jobs and Mark Zuckerberg being named as college dropout certainly puts forth a question before us doubting the credibility of formal education in today’s time. There success stories have proven that even without formal education we can achieve what we dream of. Formal education nowadays pose a threat to student’s imagination by forcing him to limit his thinking to nothing outside the textbook.
With such strong examples of successful people in front of us surely makes us question the formal education system and assert that “formal education tends to restrain our minds and spirits rather than set them free”.

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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 262, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: However,
...nd where the particular student stands. However all of this is done by designing a comm...
^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 661, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Similarly,
...ld always believe that they are stupid. Similarly constricting a particular student to a ...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 839, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , the
...ually good at or interested in. Secondly,the limited scope of the curriculum can cut...
^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, however, if, may, second, secondly, similarly, so, well, as well as

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 11.0 19.5258426966 56% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 12.4196629213 72% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 14.8657303371 61% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 11.3162921348 97% => OK
Pronoun: 33.0 33.0505617978 100% => OK
Preposition: 47.0 58.6224719101 80% => OK
Nominalization: 13.0 12.9106741573 101% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1681.0 2235.4752809 75% => OK
No of words: 344.0 442.535393258 78% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.88662790698 5.05705443957 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.30665032142 4.55969084622 94% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.63174851703 2.79657885939 94% => OK
Unique words: 189.0 215.323595506 88% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.549418604651 0.4932671777 111% => OK
syllable_count: 527.4 704.065955056 75% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59117977528 94% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 6.24550561798 48% => OK
Article: 3.0 4.99550561798 60% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.10617977528 97% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.77640449438 56% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.38483146067 46% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 14.0 20.2370786517 69% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 24.0 23.0359550562 104% => OK
Sentence length SD: 38.3414439808 60.3974514979 63% => OK
Chars per sentence: 120.071428571 118.986275619 101% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.5714285714 23.4991977007 105% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.5 5.21951772744 105% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 7.80617977528 38% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 10.2758426966 107% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 5.13820224719 39% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.83258426966 21% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.206683427807 0.243740707755 85% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0644240407263 0.0831039109588 78% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0726117590973 0.0758088955206 96% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.140920062471 0.150359130593 94% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0688514950934 0.0667264976115 103% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.9 14.1392134831 98% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 55.58 48.8420337079 114% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 12.1743820225 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.38 12.1639044944 94% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.99 8.38706741573 95% => OK
difficult_words: 69.0 100.480337079 69% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 11.8971910112 92% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 11.2143820225 103% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.7820224719 102% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------
Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.


Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.