The line graph below shows changes in the amount and type of fast food consumed by Australian teenagers from 1975 to 2000.

Essay topics:

The line graph below shows changes in the amount and type of fast food consumed by Australian teenagers from 1975 to 2000.

Submitted by HuyenB1 on Mon, 12/10/2018 - 14:49

Given is a line graph illustrating that the proportion of fast food including pizza, fish and chips and hamburger that young adults consumed in Australia over the period of 25 years since 1975.
In general, both the figure for hamburger and pizza increased. Besides, the data on fish and chips experienced a reverse trend.

Concerning fish and chips, at the beginning of the period, the rate was highest and it went down steady to 80% until 1980. In next 5 years, there was a slight rise to nearly 100% before it saw a dramatically decline to 40% for the rest of the period.

Regarding hamburger, the rate saw a dramatic growth to over 80% in first 10 years and rasing to 100% until 1995 before the number remained the same for the rest of the period. The data on hamburger exceeded the figure for fish and chips in 90% at 1985.

Similar to hamburger, in first 10 years, the rate of pizza rose slightly to 30% and continue went up quickly to over 80% until 1995. The percentage of fish and chips went below the proportion of pizza in over 60% in 1990 and the rate saw a plateau at the end of the period.

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IELTS Writing Task I - IELTS Academic

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 4, column 194, Rule ID: A_RB_NN[1]
Message: You used an adverb ('dramatically') instead an adjective, or a noun ('decline') instead of another adjective.
...light rise to nearly 100% before it saw a dramatically decline to 40% for the rest of the period. R...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 8, column 80, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
..., the rate of pizza rose slightly to 30% and continue went up quickly to over 80%...
^^
Line 8, column 138, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...t up quickly to over 80% until 1995. The percentage of fish and chips went below ...
^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
besides, first, regarding, in general

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 3.0 7.0 43% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 0.0 1.00243902439 0% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 6.8 162% => OK
Relative clauses : 2.0 3.15609756098 63% => OK
Pronoun: 4.0 5.60731707317 71% => OK
Preposition: 45.0 33.7804878049 133% => OK
Nominalization: 2.0 3.97073170732 50% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 911.0 965.302439024 94% => OK
No of words: 205.0 196.424390244 104% => OK
Chars per words: 4.44390243902 4.92477711251 90% => OK
Fourth root words length: 3.78388967377 3.73543355544 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.3659793781 2.65546596893 89% => OK
Unique words: 100.0 106.607317073 94% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.487804878049 0.547539520022 89% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 262.8 283.868780488 93% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.3 1.45097560976 90% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 0.0 1.53170731707 0% => OK
Article: 6.0 4.33902439024 138% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 1.07073170732 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 0.482926829268 0% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 3.36585365854 178% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 9.0 8.94146341463 101% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 22.4926829268 98% => OK
Sentence length SD: 44.0129049538 43.030603864 102% => OK
Chars per sentence: 101.222222222 112.824112599 90% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.7777777778 22.9334400587 99% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.11111111111 5.23603664747 79% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 3.83414634146 130% => Less paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 3.0 1.69756097561 177% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 2.0 3.70975609756 54% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 0.0 1.13902439024 0% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.09268292683 171% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0607729567287 0.215688989381 28% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0260449171087 0.103423049105 25% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0626229620757 0.0843802449381 74% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.044256242481 0.15604864568 28% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0786040443196 0.0819641961636 96% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.9 13.2329268293 82% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 74.53 61.2550243902 122% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.51609756098 48% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.3 10.3012195122 81% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 8.77 11.4140731707 77% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.42 8.06136585366 92% => OK
difficult_words: 35.0 40.7170731707 86% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 11.4329268293 92% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 10.9970731707 98% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.0658536585 99% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------
Maximum four paragraphs wanted.
It is not exactly right on the topic in the view of e-grader. Maybe there is a wrong essay topic.

Rates: 11.2359550562 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 1.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.