People's attitudes are determined more by their immediate situation or surroundings than by society as a whole.Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the posit

Essay topics:

People's attitudes are determined more by their immediate situation or surroundings than by society as a whole.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.

In spite of the fact that humanity can live with more egalitarian society when they consider that their attitude and behavior have enough power to make a better world, most of the people consider only themselves or nearby situation in the most cases in their lives. A person who can think of society as a whole beyond their immediate needs and done several great works has been honored as a holy man even they had been considered as an evil, in his times.
To begin with, although there are a number of countries in the world, they have a similar and common social system they can share. These are laws and codes that needed to maintain a society unless members of society are capable of considering society as a whole whenever they make decisions. It is quite obvious that society would have been economically developed assuming that every member makes a decision as an egalitarian. Nonetheless, there are many historical and academical evidence show people are selfish and determine their decision only based on the circumstance they encounter. Communism was failed due to the fact that the planner of the society did not take account of egotism among humanity. Behavioral Economics might not be even developed unless nature of humanity was not selfish. The first chapter of modern Economics shows humanity’s self-centeredness as an accelerator of provoking economical activities and it actually facilitate as so in the real world indeed.
On top of that, mankind always has been struggled with countless disputes each other in forms of wars and diplomatic disputes. Any kinds of wars have been justified by leadership that the war is inevitable for the sake of the country or human right. However, the most significant value of the wars was based on their communities’ or personal interests. For instance, Trade War between the United States and China has been continued for a few years and both of the countries only care about their interests. However, not only the war brings about mutual economical regression between both of the countries, but it also makes the entire world’s economy suffered from it. There must be tons of ways to negotiate and conclude the war as a way to benefiting all of them. The problem is that they only care about their interests right in front of them and this may lead to the degeneration.
To summarize, although modern people live in society economically and socially developed since the dawn of man, short-sighted attitudes and behavior generate a number of struggles and regression that tease them. Therefore, it is necessary for them to cultivate see the world and make decisions with more broad eyes in order to make better world.

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Average: 6.6 (1 vote)
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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 909, Rule ID: ECONOMICAL_ECONOMIC[1]
Message: Did you mean 'economic' (=connected with economy)?
Suggestion: economic
...eredness as an accelerator of provoking economical activities and it actually facilitate a...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 947, Rule ID: IT_VBZ[1]
Message: Did you mean 'facilitates'?
Suggestion: facilitates
...g economical activities and it actually facilitate as so in the real world indeed. On to...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 25, Rule ID: ADVERB_WORD_ORDER[7]
Message: The adverb 'always' is usually put between 'has' and 'been'.
Suggestion: has always been
...world indeed. On top of that, mankind always has been struggled with countless disputes each ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...nd this may lead to the degeneration. To summarize, although modern people liv...
^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, also, but, first, however, if, may, nonetheless, so, therefore, for instance, in spite of, to begin with, on top of that

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 20.0 19.5258426966 102% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 12.4196629213 56% => OK
Conjunction : 20.0 14.8657303371 135% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 11.3162921348 106% => OK
Pronoun: 37.0 33.0505617978 112% => OK
Preposition: 58.0 58.6224719101 99% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 12.9106741573 39% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2244.0 2235.4752809 100% => OK
No of words: 450.0 442.535393258 102% => OK
Chars per words: 4.98666666667 5.05705443957 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.6057793516 4.55969084622 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.80062074248 2.79657885939 100% => OK
Unique words: 235.0 215.323595506 109% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.522222222222 0.4932671777 106% => OK
syllable_count: 731.7 704.065955056 104% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59117977528 101% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 6.24550561798 64% => OK
Article: 4.0 4.99550561798 80% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.10617977528 64% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.77640449438 113% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.38483146067 114% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 20.2370786517 89% => OK
Sentence length: 25.0 23.0359550562 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 42.928306584 60.3974514979 71% => OK
Chars per sentence: 124.666666667 118.986275619 105% => OK
Words per sentence: 25.0 23.4991977007 106% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.22222222222 5.21951772744 138% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 7.80617977528 51% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 10.2758426966 78% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 9.0 5.13820224719 175% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.83258426966 21% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.123423611504 0.243740707755 51% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0390493071169 0.0831039109588 47% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0344354855372 0.0758088955206 45% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0848045486679 0.150359130593 56% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0322039070754 0.0667264976115 48% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.6 14.1392134831 103% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 46.1 48.8420337079 94% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.0 12.1743820225 107% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.96 12.1639044944 98% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.56 8.38706741573 102% => OK
difficult_words: 105.0 100.480337079 104% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 18.0 11.8971910112 151% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.0 11.2143820225 107% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.7820224719 102% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.


Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.