The following appeared in a health newsletter.
"A ten-year nationwide study of the effectiveness of wearing a helmet while bicycling indicates that ten years ago, approximately 35 percent of all bicyclists reported wearing helmets, whereas today that number is nearly 80 percent. Another study, however, suggests that during the same ten-year period, the number of bicycle-related accidents has increased 200 percent. These results demonstrate that bicyclists feel safer because they are wearing helmets, and they take more risks as a result. Thus, to reduce the number of serious injuries from bicycle accidents, the government should concentrate more on educating people about bicycle safety and less on encouraging or requiring bicyclists to wear helmets."
Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on these assumptions and what the implications are for the argument if the assumptions prove unwarranted.
The passage claims that the government should pay less attention to encouraging and mandating bicyclists to wear helmets and focus more on educating about bicycle safety. The 35-percent increase in the use of the helmets in the past decade, in contrast to the 200-percent growth in bicycle-related accidents is the main criterium for the conclusion. Although the text seems plausible at first glance, further considerations and pursuing other data reveals vivid flaws in the write-up.
Firstly, the text discusses the percentages and not real numbers. Also, the text lacks evidence about the bicyclists' growth rate in the past ten years. A 200-precent growth in accident may be or not be considerable compared to the actual number of the bicyclists. For instance, ten years ago there was only 100 bicyclists in the town among whom 20 experienced bicycle accident. Nowadays, there are 10.000 bicyclists with 100 accidents. it is crystal clear that the accidents have increased 5 times more reaching to 100 from 20 but the ratio of accidents significantly dropped from 20% to 1%. Therefore, the number of accidents is not an appropriate indicator to appraise the bicycle-accidents situation.
Moreover, the author fails to report the number of fatalities and the severity of the accidents. While we witness a growth in the number of accidents, it is plausible that the level and severity of them reduced considerably during this period. A collection of ten accidents with eight mortalities is remarkably disastrous in comparison to a collection of thirty accidents with two mortalities. The passage needs to glean more data and evidence about the number of fatalities to assess the efficiency of the helmet-wearing policy of the government.
At last, the conclusion of the writing is weakened when the author suggests that bicyclists feel safer and they take more risks as a consequent. He did not offer any evidence to corroborate his claim. If the police reports about the accidents and the reasons approve the risky behaviour of most of the bicyclists then his notion may be true. In this regard, we need to attain more data and information to confirm the author's suggestion. In addition, there might be many other factors that play a role in the accidents growth rate. Unsuitable infrastructure, lack of bicycle lanes, Streets and road congestion and even the risky behaviour of the car drivers may be the reasons for this event.
related to helmet
the number of total byclyst
not necessarily feel safer, not good infrasteucture or limiting rules for cars . special lanes
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 22 15
No. of Words: 418 350
No. of Characters: 2114 1500
No. of Different Words: 214 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.522 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.057 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.963 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 149 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 118 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 91 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 68 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 19 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.787 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.591 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.295 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.568 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.104 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 7 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 107, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'bicyclists'' or 'bicyclist's'?
Suggestion: bicyclists'; bicyclist's
...Also, the text lacks evidence about the bicyclists growth rate in the past ten years. A 20...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 437, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
...e 10.000 bicyclists with 100 accidents. it is crystal clear that the accidents hav...
^^
Line 13, column 418, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...ore data and information to confirm the authors suggestion. In addition, there might be...
^^^^^^^
Line 13, column 509, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'accidents'' or 'accident's'?
Suggestion: accidents'; accident's
...y other factors that play a role in the accidents growth rate. Unsuitable infrastructure,...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 17, column 2, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Related
...y be the reasons for this event. related to helmet the number of total byclyst...
^^^^^^^
Line 19, column 28, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... to helmet the number of total byclyst not necessarily feel safer, not good inf...
^^^^
Line 21, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Not
...helmet the number of total byclyst not necessarily feel safer, not good infras...
^^^
Line 21, column 79, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...nfrasteucture or limiting rules for cars . special lanes
^^
Line 21, column 82, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Special
...asteucture or limiting rules for cars . special lanes
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, firstly, if, may, moreover, so, then, therefore, while, for instance, in addition, in contrast, in contrast to
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 13.0 19.6327345309 66% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 6.0 12.9520958084 46% => OK
Conjunction : 15.0 11.1786427146 134% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 13.6137724551 51% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 17.0 28.8173652695 59% => OK
Preposition: 64.0 55.5748502994 115% => OK
Nominalization: 14.0 16.3942115768 85% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2187.0 2260.96107784 97% => OK
No of words: 418.0 441.139720559 95% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.23205741627 5.12650576532 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.52162009685 4.56307096286 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.03382502848 2.78398813304 109% => OK
Unique words: 222.0 204.123752495 109% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.531100478469 0.468620217663 113% => OK
syllable_count: 658.8 705.55239521 93% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 4.96107784431 81% => OK
Article: 11.0 8.76447105788 126% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.70958083832 111% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.22255489022 95% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 19.7664670659 106% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 22.8473053892 83% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 41.7399713298 57.8364921388 72% => OK
Chars per sentence: 104.142857143 119.503703932 87% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.9047619048 23.324526521 85% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.09523809524 5.70786347227 107% => OK
Paragraphs: 6.0 5.15768463074 116% => OK
Language errors: 9.0 5.25449101796 171% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 6.0 8.20758483034 73% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 12.0 6.88822355289 174% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.67664670659 86% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.145779344422 0.218282227539 67% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0389066071378 0.0743258471296 52% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0464841653159 0.0701772020484 66% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0595664558567 0.128457276422 46% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.051446114341 0.0628817314937 82% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.2 14.3799401198 92% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 52.19 48.3550499002 108% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 12.197005988 88% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.05 12.5979740519 104% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.77 8.32208582834 105% => OK
difficult_words: 111.0 98.500998004 113% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 12.3882235529 89% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 11.1389221557 86% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.9071856287 92% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.