21. The following appeared in a memorandum from the owner of Movies Galore, a chain of movie-rental stores. "Because of declining profits, we must reduce operating expenses at Movies Galore's ten movie-rental stores. Raising prices is not a good we are famous for our low prices. Instead, we should reduce our operating hours. Last month our store in downtown Marston reduced its hours by closing at 6:00 p.m. rather than 9:00 p.m. and reduced Its overall Inventory by no longer stocking any DVD released more than five years ago. Since we have received very few customer complaints about these new policies, we should now adopt them at all other Movies Galore stores as our best strategies for improving profits."
The author thinks that because of declining profit, they must reduce operating expenses at Movies Galore’s ten movie rental stores. And he also compared the chain of stores with a store located in downtown Marston.But the conclusion made from these assumptions has raised making different questions due to which the conclusion can’t be accepted.
The author tells about implementing new policies for increasing profits. He has also mentioned that there are very few complaints regarding new policies. But here is applying these new policies to all the stores. But every store has a different kind of people living in that area. For example most of the people living in the Downtown area are in the age group of 19-25 while in the other area the age group might differ so how can be apply these new policies to all the stores. So instead of applying these new policies to all the stores he should look personally to every store bring new changes according to requirement of that particular store.
The author tells about reduction of overall inventory by no longer stocking any DVD released more than 5 years ago. Suppose most of the people living in a particular area belong to the age group of 40-50 so these people might be fans of old 90s movies so reducing the overall inventory by no longer stocking any DVD released more than 5 years ago will be a bad choice.
Also the author mentions about receiving very few complaints regarding new policies. But rather than looking to the complaints the author should look at the profits of the shop. Whether, the profit at the downtown shop has increased after implementing these new policies because profit is the only thing which matters in business. Also few complaints might be due reduction of the daily customers of the shop due to new policies. Also very few is a vague term therefore the author must see the exact number of complaints.
So instead of adopting these new policies the author should look deeply and personally into the management of every store and also make new policies according to requirement of people which will help them to increase profits. It can be done by conducting a survey or by any other means .
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- The following memorandum is from the manager of Bagel Mania Bakery Recently Bagel Mania replaced sugar with saccharin a sugar substitute throughout its bakeries in the Northeast areas of the USA Contrary to initial expectations this change did not have an 70
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Poor Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 5 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 17 15
No. of Words: 377 350
No. of Characters: 1778 1500
No. of Different Words: 162 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.406 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.716 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.453 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 125 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 82 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 65 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 37 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 22.176 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 11.294 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.706 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.38 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.38 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.156 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 1 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 215, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: But
...ith a store located in downtown Marston.But the conclusion made from these assumpti...
^^^
Line 4, column 1, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Also,
...than 5 years ago will be a bad choice. Also the author mentions about receiving ver...
^^^^
Line 4, column 331, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Also,
...e only thing which matters in business. Also few complaints might be due reduction o...
^^^^
Line 4, column 430, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Also,
...tomers of the shop due to new policies. Also very few is a vague term therefore the ...
^^^^
Line 5, column 285, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...onducting a survey or by any other means .
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, if, look, regarding, so, therefore, while, for example, kind of
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 11.0 19.6327345309 56% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 12.9520958084 100% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 11.1786427146 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 13.6137724551 51% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 17.0 28.8173652695 59% => OK
Preposition: 52.0 55.5748502994 94% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 16.3942115768 30% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1809.0 2260.96107784 80% => OK
No of words: 376.0 441.139720559 85% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.81117021277 5.12650576532 94% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.40348946061 4.56307096286 97% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.53112393631 2.78398813304 91% => OK
Unique words: 164.0 204.123752495 80% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.436170212766 0.468620217663 93% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 561.6 705.55239521 80% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 4.96107784431 60% => OK
Article: 4.0 8.76447105788 46% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 2.70958083832 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 5.0 1.67365269461 299% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 0.0 4.22255489022 0% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 19.7664670659 86% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 22.8473053892 96% => OK
Sentence length SD: 61.1669675877 57.8364921388 106% => OK
Chars per sentence: 106.411764706 119.503703932 89% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.1176470588 23.324526521 95% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.35294117647 5.70786347227 76% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 5.25449101796 95% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 6.0 8.20758483034 73% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 6.88822355289 87% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.67664670659 107% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.151232237272 0.218282227539 69% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0576768379169 0.0743258471296 78% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.120772599481 0.0701772020484 172% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.11217717587 0.128457276422 87% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.146262029831 0.0628817314937 233% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.3 14.3799401198 86% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 57.61 48.3550499002 119% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 12.197005988 88% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.62 12.5979740519 84% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.46 8.32208582834 90% => OK
difficult_words: 65.0 98.500998004 66% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 7.5 12.3882235529 61% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 11.1389221557 97% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.9071856287 92% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.