The diagram below show the changes that have taken place at west park secondary school since its construction in 1950

Essay topics:

The diagram below show the changes that have taken place at west park secondary school since its construction in 1950.

The three supplied maps compare data regarding that took place in a park called west park secondary school throughout 1950 and 2010.

According to the given information, the park was changed over a 60 year period and offer to people more possiblities than they used to have such as school, playground places in 1950. However, there were so many amenities had built such as science block, car park, sports field from 1980 to 2010.

First of all, there were four locations which were separated from a main road the size of locations were equal in 1950. To the left-hand corner of the map, houses had located which were determined three staffs then school building was joined directly to the houses. Farmland was replaced in the west side of the picture. Moreover, playground station and school destinations were situated the same position over the period of 60 years.

Turning to the 1980, the destination of farmland was changed into sport field in the west. The new science block and car park were substituted the houses in 1980 which was divided two portions. To the right hand side of the map observed a main school facility.

Lastly, contribution of the last year constraction had experienced so many alterations. The size of car park was expanded higher rather than for the remaining in 1980. This building was contributed small science block in the bottom of the map which was connected directly to the main school. The sport field was marginalised in the bottom of the picture.

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Average: 7.3 (2 votes)
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Essay Categories
IELTS Writing Task I - IELTS Academic

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 287, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... block, car park, sports field from 1980 to 2010. First of all, there were fo...
^^
Line 5, column 68, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ur locations which were separated from a main road the size of locations were equ...
^^
Line 9, column 67, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...e last year constraction had experienced so many alterations. The size of car par...
^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, however, lastly, moreover, regarding, second, so, then, such as, first of all

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 16.0 7.0 229% => Less to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 0.0 1.00243902439 0% => OK
Conjunction : 4.0 6.8 59% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 5.0 3.15609756098 158% => OK
Pronoun: 3.0 5.60731707317 54% => OK
Preposition: 36.0 33.7804878049 107% => OK
Nominalization: 9.0 3.97073170732 227% => Less nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1243.0 965.302439024 129% => OK
No of words: 253.0 196.424390244 129% => OK
Chars per words: 4.91304347826 4.92477711251 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 3.98822939669 3.73543355544 107% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.54469337796 2.65546596893 96% => OK
Unique words: 131.0 106.607317073 123% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.517786561265 0.547539520022 95% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 349.2 283.868780488 123% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.45097560976 96% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 1.0 1.53170731707 65% => OK
Article: 6.0 4.33902439024 138% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 1.07073170732 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 0.482926829268 0% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 3.36585365854 89% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 14.0 8.94146341463 157% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 22.4926829268 80% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 33.9168400771 43.030603864 79% => OK
Chars per sentence: 88.7857142857 112.824112599 79% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.0714285714 22.9334400587 79% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.35714285714 5.23603664747 121% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 3.83414634146 130% => Less paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 3.0 1.69756097561 177% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 2.0 3.70975609756 54% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 1.13902439024 263% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 9.0 4.09268292683 220% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.163973990336 0.215688989381 76% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0617577861235 0.103423049105 60% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.069995103658 0.0843802449381 83% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.119782411048 0.15604864568 77% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0799691581146 0.0819641961636 98% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.7 13.2329268293 81% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 70.13 61.2550243902 114% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.51609756098 135% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 7.9 10.3012195122 77% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.9 11.4140731707 95% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.59 8.06136585366 94% => OK
difficult_words: 49.0 40.7170731707 120% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 11.4329268293 96% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 10.9970731707 84% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.0658536585 99% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------
Maximum four paragraphs wanted.

Rates: 73.0337078652 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 6.5 Out of 9
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 287, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... block, car park, sports field from 1980 to 2010. First of all, there were fo...
^^
Line 5, column 68, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ur locations which were separated from a main road the size of locations were equ...
^^
Line 9, column 67, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...e last year constraction had experienced so many alterations. The size of car par...
^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, however, lastly, moreover, regarding, second, so, then, such as, first of all

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 16.0 7.0 229% => Less to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 0.0 1.00243902439 0% => OK
Conjunction : 4.0 6.8 59% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 5.0 3.15609756098 158% => OK
Pronoun: 3.0 5.60731707317 54% => OK
Preposition: 36.0 33.7804878049 107% => OK
Nominalization: 9.0 3.97073170732 227% => Less nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1243.0 965.302439024 129% => OK
No of words: 253.0 196.424390244 129% => OK
Chars per words: 4.91304347826 4.92477711251 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 3.98822939669 3.73543355544 107% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.54469337796 2.65546596893 96% => OK
Unique words: 131.0 106.607317073 123% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.517786561265 0.547539520022 95% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 349.2 283.868780488 123% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.45097560976 96% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 1.0 1.53170731707 65% => OK
Article: 6.0 4.33902439024 138% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 1.07073170732 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 0.482926829268 0% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 3.36585365854 89% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 14.0 8.94146341463 157% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 22.4926829268 80% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 33.9168400771 43.030603864 79% => OK
Chars per sentence: 88.7857142857 112.824112599 79% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.0714285714 22.9334400587 79% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.35714285714 5.23603664747 121% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 3.83414634146 130% => Less paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 3.0 1.69756097561 177% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 2.0 3.70975609756 54% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 1.13902439024 263% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 9.0 4.09268292683 220% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.163973990336 0.215688989381 76% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0617577861235 0.103423049105 60% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.069995103658 0.0843802449381 83% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.119782411048 0.15604864568 77% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0799691581146 0.0819641961636 98% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.7 13.2329268293 81% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 70.13 61.2550243902 114% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.51609756098 135% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 7.9 10.3012195122 77% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.9 11.4140731707 95% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.59 8.06136585366 94% => OK
difficult_words: 49.0 40.7170731707 120% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 11.4329268293 96% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 10.9970731707 84% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.0658536585 99% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------
Maximum four paragraphs wanted.

Rates: 73.0337078652 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 6.5 Out of 9
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.