Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Telephones and email have made communication between people less personal. Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion.
When I study abroad, I cherish every moment that I can talk to my family. In usual time, I choose to email them because of the price and speed of delivery. Telephones and email are the most important parts in my life in the foreign country and they act as a bridge between me and my family. Hence, I disagree with the statement that telephones and email have made communication between people less personal. I will elaborate my points of view in different reasons.
With Internet network, we can save a lot of money and time that we need to pay in the past time. Email is not only free but also fast. We can receive the messages from the hometown immediately. Take me as an example. When I study in America, my brother emails me that he had got a wonderful job. I can feel and share his joy at almost the same time. Sometimes I will be kind of homesick and I will read the email that my parents sent to encourage me. I can't forget the meaning in the letter and the importance of the email.
Voice is an essential symbol of a human and we need it when we are sad. Living alone in an unfamiliar city makes me feel lonely very often. Although, I have my friends here, I still want some company from my family. Thus, I will save money in order to give a phone call to them. Because of the different time zone, I have to wake up early to talk to them. However, I didn't feel tired but touched and motivated after the communication. Every word from my hometown, Taiwan supported me to face the challenge. Therefore, I think that using a telephone can make people be more connected and cherish each other.
To sum up, the technology of communication, like telephone and email, is a faster, easier and cheaper way to connect each other and makes the world closer.
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flaws:
The essay is not exactly right on the topic. You were talking about the advantages of Telephones and email, but not why they are still personal.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: ? in 30
Category: ? Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 22 15
No. of Words: 330 350
No. of Characters: 1387 1500
No. of Different Words: 179 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.262 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.203 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.376 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 78 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 56 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 34 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 25 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 15 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.143 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.364 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.323 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.46 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.13 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5