"Five years ago, at a time when we had difficulties in obtaining reliable supplier of high-quality wool fabric, we discontinued production of our alpaca overcoat. Now that we have a new fabric supplier, we should resume production. This coat should sell very well: since we have not offered an alpaca overcoat for five years and since our major competitor no longer makes an alpaca overcoat, there will be pent-up customer demand. Also, since the price of most types of clothing has increased in each of the past five years, customers should be willing to pay significantly higher prices for alpaca overcoats than they did five years ago, and our company profits will increase."
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
While it may be true people will buy fabric overcoats with higher price after five years of production those overcoats again, this author’s argument does not make a cogent case for investing that money. It is easy to understand that the company will make a good profit by selling those coats especially because their major competitor does not make those coats anymore, but the author needs verifiable evidences to prove his/her claim.
First of all, the author does not mention if the new wool fabric which to make alpaca overcoat have the same quality compare to five years ago or not. It is obvious that if the quality is not the same people who are still interested to buy alpaca overcoats after five years are not going to buy those overcoats anymore. Moreover, we do not know if people are still interested to even buy alpaca overcoats after five years. Customers might have got to use other clothes other than alpaca overcoats. Or people might think that alpaca overcoats are not new fashion clothes anymore because there were no fabric coats in stores in last five years.
Additionally, the author claims that with selling fabric clothes the company is going to make a high profit; however, he/she does not give any information about the cost of buying those wool fabrics. For example, If the cost price is high, even if people buy them with higher price, still the company earnings will not increase that much.
Last but not least, the author does not say that why their major competitor does not produce those coats anymore which can make different perspective of the result. It may be because those wool fabric are expensive to buy which can cause higher purchasing price than making money. Or it may be because the new supplier does not provide those wool fabrics with same high quality as before. Thus, the competitor does not want to produce alpaca overcoats with low quality materials to ruin their company reputation.
The author can make his/her recommendation persuasive when he/she gathers information about the quality of the new wool-fabric, people’s attention to buy fabric overcoats, and also costing and selling price. After answering these questions, the author can make such a conclusion.
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Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.5 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 5 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 3 2
No. of Sentences: 15 15
No. of Words: 377 350
No. of Characters: 1803 1500
No. of Different Words: 162 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.406 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.782 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.306 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 116 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 81 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 45 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 37 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 25.133 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.032 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.8 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.418 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.418 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.224 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 1 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 4, column 184, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this wool' or 'those wools'?
Suggestion: this wool; those wools
...ective of the result. It may be because those wool fabric are expensive to buy which can c...
^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, however, if, may, moreover, so, still, thus, while, for example, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 19.6327345309 71% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 12.9520958084 93% => OK
Conjunction : 7.0 11.1786427146 63% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 13.6137724551 88% => OK
Pronoun: 35.0 28.8173652695 121% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 33.0 55.5748502994 59% => More preposition wanted.
Nominalization: 8.0 16.3942115768 49% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1851.0 2260.96107784 82% => OK
No of words: 373.0 441.139720559 85% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.96246648794 5.12650576532 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.39467950092 4.56307096286 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.39439457334 2.78398813304 86% => OK
Unique words: 164.0 204.123752495 80% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.439678284182 0.468620217663 94% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 582.3 705.55239521 83% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 4.96107784431 121% => OK
Article: 6.0 8.76447105788 68% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.70958083832 148% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.67365269461 239% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 1.0 4.22255489022 24% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 15.0 19.7664670659 76% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 24.0 22.8473053892 105% => OK
Sentence length SD: 47.616243727 57.8364921388 82% => OK
Chars per sentence: 123.4 119.503703932 103% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.8666666667 23.324526521 107% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.33333333333 5.70786347227 111% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.25449101796 19% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 8.20758483034 61% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 6.88822355289 44% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.67664670659 150% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.201982216866 0.218282227539 93% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0800826611505 0.0743258471296 108% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0567461182332 0.0701772020484 81% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.11241130614 0.128457276422 88% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0579786422645 0.0628817314937 92% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.4 14.3799401198 100% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 47.12 48.3550499002 97% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.7 12.197005988 104% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.78 12.5979740519 94% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.32 8.32208582834 88% => OK
difficult_words: 59.0 98.500998004 60% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 18.0 12.3882235529 145% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 11.1389221557 104% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.9071856287 101% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.