The following appeared in a health newsletter.
"A ten-year nationwide study of the effectiveness of wearing a helmet while bicycling indicates that ten years ago, approximately 35 percent of all bicyclists reported wearing helmets, whereas today that number is nearly 80 percent. Another study, however, suggests that during the same ten-year period, the number of accidents caused by bicycling has increased 200 percent. These results demonstrate that bicyclists feel safer because they are wearing helmets, and they take more risks as a result. Thus, there is clearly a call for the government to strive to reduce the number of serious injuries from bicycle accidents by launching an education program that concentrates on the factors other than helmet use that are necessary for bicycle safety."
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation and the argument on which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.
According to the given statement from a health newsletter, the government should start an education program regarding bicycle safety that focuses on factors outside from helmet use in order to decrease the number of detriments yielded by bicycle accidents. The author cites a ten-year nationwide study and another study to bolster the argument. However, there are some questions that need to be answered for the recommendation to become sound.
To begin with, the author needs to answer the question regarding the change of total number of people during ten years of research. If the number for peo...
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
Sentence: If the number for people who ride bicycle has increased greatly througout ten years, increase of reported helmet use from 35 to 80 percent and 200 percent increase in the number of bicycle related accidents are explained.
Error: througout Suggestion: throughout
Sentence: Owing to the significant increase in people who ride bicyles, helmet sales could have boosted, thus resulting in wearing more helmets.
Error: bicyles Suggestion: bicycles
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argument 1 -- OK
argument 2 -- OK
argument 3 -- OK
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 5.0 out of 6
Category: Very Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 2 2
No. of Sentences: 21 15
No. of Words: 446 350
No. of Characters: 2290 1500
No. of Different Words: 196 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.596 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.135 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.608 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 188 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 137 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 87 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 58 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 21.238 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.502 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.762 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.342 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.541 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.09 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Discourse Markers used:
['also', 'but', 'however', 'if', 'lastly', 'moreover', 'nevertheless', 'regarding', 'so', 'therefore', 'thus', 'as to', 'in addition', 'to begin with']
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.284253578732 0.25644967241 111% => OK
Verbs: 0.179959100204 0.15541462614 116% => OK
Adjectives: 0.0531697341513 0.0836205057962 64% => OK
Adverbs: 0.0368098159509 0.0520304965353 71% => OK
Pronouns: 0.0102249488753 0.0272364105082 38% => OK
Prepositions: 0.120654396728 0.125424944231 96% => OK
Participles: 0.0490797546012 0.0416121511921 118% => OK
Conjunctions: 2.70077758463 2.79052419416 97% => OK
Infinitives: 0.0511247443763 0.026700313972 191% => Less infinitives wanted.
Particles: 0.00204498977505 0.001811407834 113% => OK
Determiners: 0.106339468303 0.113004496875 94% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.0204498977505 0.0255425247493 80% => OK
WH_determiners: 0.0122699386503 0.0127820249294 96% => OK
Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 2792.0 2731.13054187 102% => OK
No of words: 446.0 446.07635468 100% => OK
Chars per words: 6.2600896861 6.12365571057 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.5955099915 4.57801047555 100% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.428251121076 0.378187486979 113% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.311659192825 0.287650121315 108% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.208520179372 0.208842608468 100% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.139013452915 0.135150697306 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.70077758463 2.79052419416 97% => OK
Unique words: 201.0 207.018472906 97% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.45067264574 0.469332199767 96% => OK
Word variations: 49.6793898528 52.1807786196 95% => OK
How many sentences: 21.0 20.039408867 105% => OK
Sentence length: 21.2380952381 23.2022227129 92% => OK
Sentence length SD: 53.0833426777 57.7814097925 92% => OK
Chars per sentence: 132.952380952 141.986410481 94% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.2380952381 23.2022227129 92% => OK
Discourse Markers: 0.666666666667 0.724660767414 92% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.14285714286 97% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 3.58251231527 0% => OK
Readability: 52.4040145206 51.9672348444 101% => OK
Elegance: 2.0 1.8405768891 109% => OK
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.327663047484 0.441005458295 74% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.131013514644 0.135418324435 97% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.0717889036821 0.0829849096947 87% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.582818277055 0.58762219726 99% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.183053054162 0.147661913831 124% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.14154861076 0.193483328276 73% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0692835333531 0.0970749176394 71% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.404086310351 0.42659136922 95% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.0540155939148 0.0774707102158 70% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.220993396654 0.312017818177 71% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.073873336249 0.0698173142475 106% => OK
Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 8.33743842365 144% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.87684729064 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.82512315271 83% => OK
Positive topic words: 12.0 6.46551724138 186% => OK
Negative topic words: 5.0 5.36822660099 93% => OK
Neutral topic words: 3.0 2.82389162562 106% => OK
Total topic words: 20.0 14.657635468 136% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
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Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6 -- The score is based on the average performance of 20,000 argument essays. This e-grader is not smart enough to check on arguments.
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Note: This is not the final score. The e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.