TPO-01 - Independent Writing Task
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
At universities and colleges, sports and social activities are just as important as classes and libraries and should receive equal financial support.
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Many people believe that sports and social activities are just as important as classes and libraries and hence should receive equal financial support. Students attend university to get a higher education, to pursue higher degree and so that they can achieve their goals and can get success in the life. Sports and social activities are important for students, but classes and libraries are fundamental. In my view, classes and libraries are essential than sports and social activities, so former should receive more financial support.
University needs more money for classes and libraries. Students at the university require up to date class and library facility so that they can get good education. Students need good classes to attend their lectures. Recent days, classes at all the universities are with latest facilities, like air conditioning, heating and good sound system, so that students can fully concentrate in the study. To run these classes, university needs well-educated and knowledgeable professors and so to hire these professors, university should receive financial support.
Students need latest library facility to get all the study material to get good education. They need latest technology like computers and internet facility. These tools are very important to get the latest knowledge. Moreover, students require latest updated subject books and research magazines collection. To run the library, university needs sincere staff members for long hours. For long hours, library uses lots of electricity to keep the area pleasant. So, this way, university needs money to operate library.
I do believe that sports and social activities are important, but not at the cost of study. These activities are important for students’ good physical and mental health. In my view, if students indulge themselves into sports and social activities, then it becomes difficult for them to fully concentrate into study and get a higher score in all the tests. And if any individual wants to pursue career in the sports, then, the person can achieve by joining any sports club outside university. Here, I would like to give the example of Sachin Tendulkar, who is the greatest Indian cricketer, never attended university to get cricket training. In short, physical and mental health is important for students and can be achieved by spending less money outside the university. And students can also play sports on grounds and do social activities by joining some clubs at university, but I do not think that these activities need lots of money.
In nutshell, classes and libraries are more important than sports and social activities at university. Sports training and social activities can be done at university with use of less money, or outside the university with the help of other resources, but knowledge and education cannot be achieved without classes, professors and libraries, and all these things need lots of money, so that classes and libraries should receive more financial support than sports and social activities.
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
|---|---|---|---|
| 2020-01-23 | King harald | 80 | view |
| 2020-01-06 | Sally Bassem | 76 | view |
| 2020-01-01 | prayashpathak | 66 | view |
| 2019-12-19 | Mazharsaeedbutt | 70 | view |
| 2019-12-18 | tuktuki1311 | 73 | view |
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
flaws:
No. of Words: 480 while No. of Different Words: 186 //it means it has a lot of duplicated content.
We are expecting:
No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 20 in 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 25 15
No. of Words: 480 350
No. of Characters: 2496 1500
No. of Different Words: 186 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.681 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.2 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.627 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 200 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 149 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 102 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 72 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 19.2 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.914 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.6 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.356 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.494 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.142 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5
Thank you very much, essayE
Thank you very much, essayE-rater for your comments and suggestions, can you tell me how to increase vocabulary for essays??..
Better to have 5 paragraphs
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments will increase the vocabulary words, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1
para 3: reason 2
para 4: reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
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Or more in details:
Para 1: introduction. my choice: A or B. agree or disagree. (suppose we support side A)
Para 2: First, reason 1 (1 sentence) + why reason 1(some arguments. 2-3 sentences) + examples for reason 1 (around 1 sentences) + small conclusions (like advantages of reason 1 or comparisons if not reason 1, 1-2 sentences).
Para 3: Second, reason 2, blabla... do the same thing as First
Para 4: Admittedly, there are some advantages of side B. first,....second...However, there is no causation/relation... Still I support side A, ...first,....second...
Para 5: Conclusion.
An simple example (Eating at home or restaurant) for paragraph 2:
Para 2: First, reason 1 (1 sentence: Eating at home can save money) + why reason 1(some arguments. 2-3 sentences: I can prepare cheaper food from food market; I don't need to drive or take a bus to reach the restaurant; I don't need to pay tips...) + examples for reason 1 (around 1 sentence: for example, a sandwich can cost me $10 at restaurant, but it only cost me $5 at home.) + small conclusions (like advantages of reason 1 or comparisons if not reason 1, 1-2 sentences: with the money I saved, I can buy a good book to read; I can use the money for a trip...).
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read TOEFL essays by this user:
http://www.testbig.com/users/ftn
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 268, Rule ID: THE_SUPERLATIVE[2]
Message: A determiner is probably missing here: 'with the latest'.
Suggestion: with the latest
...ys, classes at all the universities are with latest facilities, like air conditioning, heat...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 10, Rule ID: THE_SUPERLATIVE[2]
Message: A determiner is probably missing here: 'need the latest'.
Suggestion: need the latest
...ld receive financial support. Students need latest library facility to get all the study m...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 96, Rule ID: THE_SUPERLATIVE[2]
Message: A determiner is probably missing here: 'need the latest'.
Suggestion: need the latest
...dy material to get good education. They need latest technology like computers and internet ...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 8, column 486, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...port than sports and social activities.
^^^^^^^^^
Discourse Markers used:
['also', 'but', 'hence', 'if', 'moreover', 'so', 'then', 'well', 'in short', 'in my view']
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.290740740741 0.229887763892 126% => OK
Verbs: 0.122222222222 0.158761421928 77% => OK
Adjectives: 0.12037037037 0.0866891130778 139% => OK
Adverbs: 0.037037037037 0.046263068375 80% => OK
Pronouns: 0.0240740740741 0.0685040099705 35% => OK
Prepositions: 0.107407407407 0.118717715034 90% => OK
Participles: 0.0111111111111 0.0351676179071 32% => Some participles wanted.
Conjunctions: 2.76435332502 2.67179642975 103% => OK
Infinitives: 0.0296296296296 0.0309702414327 96% => OK
Particles: 0.0 0.00188951952338 0% => OK
Determiners: 0.0555555555556 0.0887237588012 63% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.0259259259259 0.0209618222197 124% => OK
WH_determiners: 0.00185185185185 0.0139019557991 13% => Some subClauses wanted starting by 'Which, Who, What, Whom, Whose.....'
Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 3059.0 2387.08602151 128% => OK
No of words: 480.0 408.028673835 118% => OK
Chars per words: 6.37291666667 5.86048508987 109% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.68069463864 4.48200974243 104% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.435416666667 0.338922669872 128% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.316666666667 0.251872472559 126% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.227083333333 0.174417080927 130% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.166666666667 0.112833075102 148% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.76435332502 2.67179642975 103% => OK
Unique words: 203.0 212.727598566 95% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.422916666667 0.524397521467 81% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
Word variations: 47.3104033772 59.2087087015 80% => OK
How many sentences: 25.0 20.6684587814 121% => OK
Sentence length: 19.2 20.5533526081 93% => OK
Sentence length SD: 68.3701221295 48.84282405 140% => OK
Chars per sentence: 122.36 120.699889404 101% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.2 20.5533526081 93% => OK
Discourse Markers: 0.4 0.644075263715 62% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.5376344086 110% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.54480286738 72% => OK
Readability: 50.8666666667 45.7405998639 111% => OK
Elegance: 2.23232323232 1.45489161554 153% => OK
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.429125723149 0.300154397459 143% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.146878286801 0.103427244359 142% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.108706094739 0.0752933317313 144% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.528708183606 0.497263757937 106% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.15157444659 0.151897553556 100% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.174515454682 0.114077575197 153% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.145735905718 0.0781384742642 187% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.423637589533 0.336927656856 126% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.0742560619645 0.067059652881 111% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.317399060431 0.210909579961 150% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.155275756073 0.0618886996521 251% => OK
Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 20.0 11.8870967742 168% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.86379928315 26% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.91756272401 81% => OK
Positive topic words: 20.0 8.42114695341 237% => OK
Negative topic words: 1.0 2.4623655914 41% => OK
Neutral topic words: 4.0 2.75985663082 145% => OK
Total topic words: 25.0 13.6433691756 183% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
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Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: This is not the final score. The e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.