"The best way for a society to prepare its young people for leadership in government, industry, or other fields is by instilling in them a sense of cooperation, not competition."
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim. In developing and supporting your position, be sure to address the most compelling reasons and/or examples that could be used to challenge your position.
In asserting that the best way for a society to prepare its young people for government, industry or other field is by installing in them a sense of cooperation, rather than competition, the author failed to acknowledge other diverse issues - the fact that incentives and motivations, in societies, must reside as a fundamental key factor - besides communities that have the motivation as a primary factor. Nevertheless, I agree with the statement to the extent that "only" societies with a high spirit is considered, in other cases, as will be elucidated in the points below, it will not be so.
First, it is acceptable as a fact that cooperation leads to teamwork, as a result, teamwork builds higher work efficiency. To elaborate on, societies with a spirit of teamwork are more prosperous, and their young people can collaborate with each other better. Take for instance most of the erudite researchers in my former university, University of Guilan, that were not capable of conducting a simple research with the collaboration of other researchers. they got used to the fact of doing a research on their own, and never thought of reaching a compromise with other students. As a result, the majority of the young studied, when choosing a job or deciding for their career, tend to eschew work environments that entail teamwork and cooperation. Simply put, lack of the appropriate skill to do conduct a research, experiment, or even a job project lead them to failure in the foreseeable future in their vocation. Consequently, it is acceptable that cooperation is mandatory for young people, both in school and graduate study, to become ready for their future profession.
With these examples, it could be argued that cooperation is the only factor necessary for leadership in a government or in an industry. But when viewed holistically, it is not so, because if it were not for the competition, the human kind would not have thrived since cavemen appeared. An example can shed light on my point. Since the dawn of humanity, humankind has been getting into wars, for pieces of lands, or fighting over resources for a better life. Persian empire is a good example, if it were not for the competition and the acquisitiveness of the leader of the time, Darius, the Persian empire would not have gained such a power all over Asia and Europe. When people are being challenged, they have more incentive and motivation for success. furthermore, they become greedy to have a better life, to surmount obstacles in their life. As a result, a competitive spirit helps people to excel others and to outdo their peers, a key factor mandatory for a leadership in all parts of a society from government to industry.
To conclude, based on the aforementioned examples and reason, I agree with the statement to the extent that "only" societies with a great fundamental motivation and high spirit is considered. In other cases, competition is a significant part of leadership in a community.
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 394, Rule ID: A_UNCOUNTABLE[3]
Message: Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply 'simple research'.
Suggestion: simple research
...an, that were not capable of conducting a simple research with the collaboration of other researc...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 457, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: They
...the collaboration of other researchers. they got used to the fact of doing a researc...
^^^^
Line 3, column 492, Rule ID: A_UNCOUNTABLE[1]
Message: Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply 'research'.
Suggestion: research
...ers. they got used to the fact of doing a research on their own, and never thought of reac...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 754, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Furthermore
...e incentive and motivation for success. furthermore, they become greedy to have a better li...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
besides, but, consequently, first, furthermore, if, nevertheless, so, for instance, as a result
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 20.0 19.5258426966 102% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 12.4196629213 64% => OK
Conjunction : 17.0 14.8657303371 114% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 11.3162921348 115% => OK
Pronoun: 35.0 33.0505617978 106% => OK
Preposition: 70.0 58.6224719101 119% => OK
Nominalization: 20.0 12.9106741573 155% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2508.0 2235.4752809 112% => OK
No of words: 497.0 442.535393258 112% => OK
Chars per words: 5.046277666 5.05705443957 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.72159896747 4.55969084622 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.10310401066 2.79657885939 111% => OK
Unique words: 243.0 215.323595506 113% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.48893360161 0.4932671777 99% => OK
syllable_count: 796.5 704.065955056 113% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59117977528 101% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 6.24550561798 176% => OK
Interrogative: 2.0 0.740449438202 270% => OK
Article: 7.0 4.99550561798 140% => OK
Subordination: 9.0 3.10617977528 290% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 5.0 1.77640449438 281% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 10.0 4.38483146067 228% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 20.2370786517 94% => OK
Sentence length: 26.0 23.0359550562 113% => OK
Sentence length SD: 74.017329707 60.3974514979 123% => OK
Chars per sentence: 132.0 118.986275619 111% => OK
Words per sentence: 26.1578947368 23.4991977007 111% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.0 5.21951772744 96% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 7.80617977528 51% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 10.2758426966 107% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 5.13820224719 117% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.83258426966 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.269336125516 0.243740707755 111% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0762169209642 0.0831039109588 92% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0645007541714 0.0758088955206 85% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.178461209444 0.150359130593 119% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0792335129204 0.0667264976115 119% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.4 14.1392134831 109% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 45.09 48.8420337079 92% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.92365168539 141% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.4 12.1743820225 110% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.31 12.1639044944 101% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.93 8.38706741573 106% => OK
difficult_words: 126.0 100.480337079 125% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 31.0 11.8971910112 261% => Linsear_write_formula is high.
gunning_fog: 12.4 11.2143820225 111% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.7820224719 110% => OK
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Rates: 62.5 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.75 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.