TPO-10 - Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Playing computer games is a waste of time. Children should not be allowed to play them.Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

There is no shortage about the debate about the impact of computer games on our developing kids. In my opinion, these games are not good for our kids, it affects the developmental process of our kids, and we should prevent them to play such kinds of game. I feel this way because of two reasons which I will explore in the following essay.
In my opinion,
First of all, our kids are the most vulnerable creation of the god and it is our duty to prevent them from such kind of game which affect their potential growth. Developing kids need, physical as well as a social connection for their proper growth and development. For example, physical exercise is required for the proper development and maturation of body muscles, which makes them stronger, However, computer game prevent them to play physical games like football, cricket or other running game. Due to this our kids suffered from some kind muscular weakness. Physcial exercise is required for the proper blood supply in the body, which is the source of nutrient supply to the internal organ. My own experience is a compelling example for this. When I was a kid, I was addicted to the computer games, because of it, I had a problem in my spinal cord and was unable to walk. The doctor advised me to do some physical exercise. Therefore, I strongly believe that computer games should be bad, it affects our kids at large.
Secondly, Computer games affect the brain development of our kids. There are several scientific studies showed that computer games had an adverse effect on the nervous system, and it affects cognitive ability of the developing kids. Such kind of kids displays lower ability in learning and memory. In kids, the nervous system is highly affected by the environment in which our kids are growing, It affects the synaptic plasticity and brain volume too, which have negative consequences on the personality of our kids. For instance, my younger daughter is affected by this syndrome because of the computer games. She lacks the ability of social communication along with lower IQ. She was a computer game lover, but nowadays she is visiting to the neurobiologist and psychologist.
In conclusion, I agree with the statement that computer games are no good for our children, it affects their mental as well as physical development. Therefore, I would like to suggest to ban these kinds of harmful game.

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Average: 7 (1 vote)
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 188, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ds, it affects the developmental process of our kids, and we should prevent them ...
^^
Line 1, column 342, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... I will explore in the following essay. In my opinion, First of all, our kids a...
^^^
Line 5, column 177, Rule ID: ADMIT_ENJOY_VB[1]
Message: This verb is used with the gerund form: 'suggest banning'.
Suggestion: suggest banning
...development. Therefore, I would like to suggest to ban these kinds of harmful game.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, however, if, second, secondly, so, therefore, well, for example, for instance, i feel, in conclusion, kind of, as well as, first of all, in my opinion

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 15.1003584229 126% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 5.0 9.8082437276 51% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 13.8261648746 80% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 11.0286738351 91% => OK
Pronoun: 52.0 43.0788530466 121% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 51.0 52.1666666667 98% => OK
Nominalization: 12.0 8.0752688172 149% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1980.0 1977.66487455 100% => OK
No of words: 407.0 407.700716846 100% => OK
Chars per words: 4.86486486486 4.8611393121 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.49157444576 4.48103885553 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.64928675424 2.67179642975 99% => OK
Unique words: 191.0 212.727598566 90% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.469287469287 0.524837075471 89% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 626.4 618.680645161 101% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 16.0 9.59856630824 167% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.51792114695 57% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.86738351254 161% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 20.6003584229 102% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 20.1344086022 94% => OK
Sentence length SD: 52.2194479892 48.9658058833 107% => OK
Chars per sentence: 94.2857142857 100.406767564 94% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.380952381 20.6045352989 94% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.71428571429 5.45110844103 142% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 11.8709677419 76% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 8.0 3.85842293907 207% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.88709677419 82% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.14290412829 0.236089414692 61% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0478573065331 0.076458572812 63% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0439251978306 0.0737576698707 60% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.107813325192 0.150856017488 71% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0303348599185 0.0645574589148 47% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.2 11.7677419355 95% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 60.65 58.1214874552 104% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 10.1575268817 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.91 10.9000537634 100% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.34 8.01818996416 104% => OK
difficult_words: 97.0 86.8835125448 112% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 10.0537634409 95% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.