The following appeared in the editorial section of a local newspaper:
On average, middle-aged consumers devote 39 percent of their retail expenditure to department store products and services, while for younger consumers the average is only 25 percent. Since the number of middle-aged people will increase dramatically within the next decade, department stores can expect retail sales to increase significantly during that period. Furthermore, to take advantage of the trend, these stores should begin to replace some of those products intended to attract the younger consumer with products intended to attract the middle-aged consumer.
The argument claims that reducing the number of products intended to attract younger people by products attracting older people will increase the sales of the store in the next decade.Stated in this way the argument manipulates facts and gives a distorted view of the situation. The conclusion of the argument is rife with holes and assumptions for which there is no transpicuous evidence. Hence the argument lacks perspicuity and has several imperfections.
Primarily, the argument claims that the revenue for the middle aged and the younger people is same. If younger people earned more,for example, $200 and 25 % of it would be $50. And if the middle aged people earned only $100 and 39 % of it would be $39. In this case the department store gets more sales from the younger people. Replacing the products will only lead to a loss for the departmental store.
Secondly, the argument readily assumes that the average amount of the revenue spent by the people is correct. If the expenditure of both is 100 and 39 percent spent by the middle aged people would be 39 and similarly amount spent by younger people will be 25 . A difference of 14 would not be a greater difference that the store can get.If the amount is huge,the argument is valid. But no such evidence is shown.
Next in line, the argument asserts that after ten years the revenue would increase if the store replaces some of the products for middle aged people. The argument is flawed because the preference of people after years could change.The younger people now will be the middle aged people ten years later. So, their preference to the department store would be the same and there is no proof that it will increase.
Finally, we are left with so many questions about how the store came to such a conclusion. Was a survey conducted? If there was a survey, were the number of men and women equal?Are the preference of the men and women same all through the year? Were there equal number of all aged group of people? Without unassailable answers to these questions, one is left with the impression that the claim is more of a wishful thinking rather than a substantive evidence.
In its totality, the argument has too many obtensibly related facts and has several questions.It would be considerably strengthened if the author provided relevant facts .If not the argument is unsubstantiated and open to debate.
- The following appeared in the editorial section of a local newspaper:On average, middle-aged consumers devote 39 percent of their retail expenditure to department store products and services, while for younger consumers the average is only 25 percent. Sin 66
- The following appeared in the editorial section of a local newspaper:On average, middle-aged consumers devote 39 percent of their retail expenditure to department store products and services, while for younger consumers the average is only 25 percent. Sin 66
- A nation should require all of its students to study the same national curriculum until they enter college.Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you t 50
- The following is a memorandum from the business manager of a television station."Over the past year, our late-night news program has devoted increased time to national news and less time to weather and local news. During this time period, most of the comp 62
- The following appeared in the editorial section of a local newspaper:On average, middle-aged consumers devote 39 percent of their retail expenditure to department store products and services, while for younger consumers the average is only 25 percent. Sin 50
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 185, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Stated
...e sales of the store in the next decade.Stated in this way the argument manipulates fa...
^^^^^^
Line 1, column 313, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ation. The conclusion of the argument is rife with holes and assumptions for whic...
^^
Line 1, column 392, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Hence,
...hich there is no transpicuous evidence. Hence the argument lacks perspicuity and has ...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 130, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , for
...e is same. If younger people earned more,for example, 00 and 25 % of it would be 0. ...
^^^^
Line 3, column 218, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...if the middle aged people earned only 00 and 39 % of it would be 9. In this case ...
^^
Line 3, column 259, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... and 39 % of it would be 9. In this case the department store gets more sales fro...
^^
Line 5, column 144, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...rrect. If the expenditure of both is 100 and 39 percent spent by the middle aged...
^^
Line 5, column 152, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...f the expenditure of both is 100 and 39 percent spent by the middle aged people ...
^^
Line 5, column 205, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...nt by the middle aged people would be 39 and similarly amount spent by younger pe...
^^
Line 5, column 262, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...mount spent by younger people will be 25 . A difference of 14 would not be a grea...
^^
Line 5, column 283, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...r people will be 25 . A difference of 14 would not be a greater difference that t...
^^
Line 5, column 342, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: If
...eater difference that the store can get.If the amount is huge,the argument is vali...
^^
Line 5, column 363, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , the
... the store can get.If the amount is huge,the argument is valid. But no such evidence...
^^^^
Line 7, column 106, Rule ID: SOME_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'some'.
Suggestion: some
...ue would increase if the store replaces some of the products for middle aged people. The ar...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 232, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: The
...ence of people after years could change.The younger people now will be the middle a...
^^^
Line 7, column 244, Rule ID: MASS_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Possible agreement error - use third-person verb forms for singular and mass nouns: 'peoples'.
Suggestion: peoples
...le after years could change.The younger people now will be the middle aged people ten ...
^^^^^^
Line 9, column 179, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Are
... were the number of men and women equal?Are the preference of the men and women sam...
^^^
Line 11, column 95, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: It
...related facts and has several questions.It would be considerably strengthened if t...
^^
Line 11, column 170, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...ed if the author provided relevant facts .If not the argument is unsubstantiated a...
^^
Line 11, column 172, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: If
... if the author provided relevant facts .If not the argument is unsubstantiated and...
^^
Discourse Markers used:
['but', 'finally', 'hence', 'if', 'second', 'secondly', 'similarly', 'so', 'then', 'as to', 'for example']
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.224215246637 0.25644967241 87% => OK
Verbs: 0.150224215247 0.15541462614 97% => OK
Adjectives: 0.100896860987 0.0836205057962 121% => OK
Adverbs: 0.042600896861 0.0520304965353 82% => OK
Pronouns: 0.0134529147982 0.0272364105082 49% => OK
Prepositions: 0.121076233184 0.125424944231 97% => OK
Participles: 0.0358744394619 0.0416121511921 86% => OK
Conjunctions: 2.69525540581 2.79052419416 97% => OK
Infinitives: 0.0134529147982 0.026700313972 50% => OK
Particles: 0.0 0.001811407834 0% => OK
Determiners: 0.14798206278 0.113004496875 131% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.0336322869955 0.0255425247493 132% => OK
WH_determiners: 0.00448430493274 0.0127820249294 35% => Some subClauses wanted starting by 'Which, Who, What, Whom, Whose.....'
Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 2392.0 2731.13054187 88% => OK
No of words: 411.0 446.07635468 92% => OK
Chars per words: 5.8199513382 6.12365571057 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.50256981431 4.57801047555 98% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.32603406326 0.378187486979 86% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.240875912409 0.287650121315 84% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.170316301703 0.208842608468 82% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.0997566909976 0.135150697306 74% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.69525540581 2.79052419416 97% => OK
Unique words: 178.0 207.018472906 86% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.433090024331 0.469332199767 92% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
Word variations: 46.2316003659 52.1807786196 89% => OK
How many sentences: 21.0 20.039408867 105% => OK
Sentence length: 19.5714285714 23.2022227129 84% => OK
Sentence length SD: 60.3171136164 57.7814097925 104% => OK
Chars per sentence: 113.904761905 141.986410481 80% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.5714285714 23.2022227129 84% => OK
Discourse Markers: 0.52380952381 0.724660767414 72% => OK
Paragraphs: 6.0 5.14285714286 117% => OK
Language errors: 20.0 3.58251231527 558% => Correct essay format wanted or double check grammar & spelling issues after essay writing.
Readability: 43.6590198123 51.9672348444 84% => OK
Elegance: 1.84782608696 1.8405768891 100% => OK
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.445081637977 0.441005458295 101% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.177655998551 0.135418324435 131% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.146283051767 0.0829849096947 176% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.603617471591 0.58762219726 103% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.203559312375 0.147661913831 138% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.197524708462 0.193483328276 102% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0889737468759 0.0970749176394 92% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.470011419258 0.42659136922 110% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.137098808603 0.0774707102158 177% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.305066611008 0.312017818177 98% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0765581788567 0.0698173142475 110% => OK
Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 8.33743842365 60% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 10.0 6.87684729064 145% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.82512315271 124% => OK
Positive topic words: 5.0 6.46551724138 77% => OK
Negative topic words: 9.0 5.36822660099 168% => OK
Neutral topic words: 4.0 2.82389162562 142% => OK
Total topic words: 18.0 14.657635468 123% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6 -- The score is based on the average performance of 20,000 argument essays. This e-grader is not smart enough to check on arguments.
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Note: This is not the final score. The e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.