"Unfortunately, in contemporary society, creating an appealing image has become more important than the reality or truth behind that image."
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.
It is said that in modern life, making a charming image has reduced the importance of reality and the truth behind that image. I agree with this point of view.
Nowadays, with the introduction of new technologies, the expectation level of some people has irrationally increased, and this subject has overshadowed all aspects of their lives. The existence of social networks, such as Instagram and Telegram in the virtual space has worsened this situation. As a result, to satisfy the unusual expectations, the truth and reality behind many things are hidden. The best example is related to the number of followers on Instagram. If you have a business and the quality of your products is good but you do not have millions of followers, individuals do not trust you for purchase. Therefore, after a while, you will be forced to buy some fake followers to deceive people to show that you are so popular and have a lot of customers. In other words, some individuals are more likely to look at the number of followers of the page instead of paying attention to the function of business owners and the quality of products. This is because many people as a customer think that a large number of followers can be a good indication to ensure the quality of services on a page while this subject is not always true. The existence of such belief gives a chance to offenders to misuse the situation and hurt the trust of people in the virtual world.
Another example is a fake image from the life that many people may present. There are a lot of individuals immersing themselves in virtual space and trying to show themselves according to what they are not in the real world. Many of them show off their life and try to pretend that they are wealthy and without any effort, they earn a lot of money. They can be a bad role model for young people. This is because teenagers may think that they don't need to attempt to study and work to become successful. Unfortunately, the story of life in social networks is designed based on what individuals want to show others, and most of the time the realities are hidden. For example, one of the famous people on social networks is Tataloo who introduces himself as a person who did not go to school, and people around him all the time try to give him money. He shows that he has a good life, and he can do what he wants, and I can say that the only activity he can do is to say some dirty words. Many young people especially boys envy him, and they think that he is so lucky. However, in the real world, he is a miserable person who is addicted to drugs and accepts the insult of others giving him money. This is a fact of his situation that many young people do not accept. Many young people are naïve and easily believe the fraud shown on social networks.
In conclusion, in my view, people are easily deceived by lies and fraud in social networks, and this issue is not acceptable to them until the truth is revealed to them.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 1009, Rule ID: LARGE_NUMBER_OF[1]
Message: Specify a number, remove phrase, or simply use 'many' or 'numerous'
Suggestion: many; numerous
...se many people as a customer think that a large number of followers can be a good indication to e...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 443, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
...s because teenagers may think that they dont need to attempt to study and work to be...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, however, if, look, may, so, therefore, while, for example, in conclusion, such as, as a result, in my view, in other words
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 28.0 19.5258426966 143% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 12.4196629213 72% => OK
Conjunction : 22.0 14.8657303371 148% => OK
Relative clauses : 14.0 11.3162921348 124% => OK
Pronoun: 55.0 33.0505617978 166% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 78.0 58.6224719101 133% => OK
Nominalization: 11.0 12.9106741573 85% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2426.0 2235.4752809 109% => OK
No of words: 540.0 442.535393258 122% => OK
Chars per words: 4.49259259259 5.05705443957 89% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.82057051367 4.55969084622 106% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.49838356522 2.79657885939 89% => OK
Unique words: 235.0 215.323595506 109% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.435185185185 0.4932671777 88% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 777.6 704.065955056 110% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.59117977528 88% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 10.0 6.24550561798 160% => OK
Article: 6.0 4.99550561798 120% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.10617977528 97% => OK
Conjunction: 7.0 1.77640449438 394% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 7.0 4.38483146067 160% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 24.0 20.2370786517 119% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 23.0359550562 96% => OK
Sentence length SD: 44.6315160198 60.3974514979 74% => OK
Chars per sentence: 101.083333333 118.986275619 85% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.5 23.4991977007 96% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.29166666667 5.21951772744 101% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 7.80617977528 26% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 10.2758426966 88% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 12.0 5.13820224719 234% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.83258426966 62% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0901173949135 0.243740707755 37% => The similarity between the topic and the content is low.
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0297489395243 0.0831039109588 36% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0464333461578 0.0758088955206 61% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0824456773738 0.150359130593 55% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0735864054368 0.0667264976115 110% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.0 14.1392134831 78% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 66.07 48.8420337079 135% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.92365168539 39% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 12.1743820225 78% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.06 12.1639044944 74% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.59 8.38706741573 90% => OK
difficult_words: 98.0 100.480337079 98% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 11.8971910112 71% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 11.2143820225 96% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.7820224719 93% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 54.17 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.25 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.