Free style Someone I admire An infuential person

Essay topics:

Free-style: Someone I admire / An infuential person

There are many reasons to admire someone. For example, people admire Bill Gates because he makes a lot of money or that student is admired by his friends because of his achievement at the top of the class. I think everyone will have a person they admire. I also admire a person. The person I admire is not a billionaire, a scientist or a singer. The person I admire is just a farmer living in the countryside, that person is my father. I admire my father because he is a perfect person for me. 
  My father knows how to do all kinds of things like building houses, working as a carpenter, cooking and so on. The house my family is living in is built by my father. In particular, he is a very patient and kind person. What I admire most of all is my father's perfectionism. He generates the main source of income for my family. Besides, he also helps my mother with housework. My father was both a farmer and a construction worker. He alone does a lot of work to make my family have a more comfortable life, besides the two main jobs my father also fixes all the things in the house. My father was like a carpenter who could build cabinets, tables, chairs and beds. Especially, he also knows how to fix cars and repair electricity. My father is always busy all day. However, my father never forgets to take care of his children.
 I not only admire my father in his work but also for his personality. He is a very patient and kind person. He taught me to behave politely and encouraged me to study well if I want to be successful. If I feel disappointed, he knows how to inspire and motivate me by his stories. My father never raised his voice at me when I did something wrong. He would patiently listen to my explanation and then point out my mistake. My father always helped me realize and correct my mistakes. he didn't criticize or scold me. My father is also a very kind person. He is very good at helping people around such as fixing houses or fixing furniture. In addition, my father is also very good at helping abandoned stray cats, he will find owners for them without letting them roam.
  I admire my father both in his work and in his life. People will usually admire famous or rich person. However, I admire the person closest to me. He always tries to give my family the happiest life. My father has always been my role model. He loves to take care of his family and is a good and responsible worker. I love him a lot. In my heart, he is always my idol.

Votes
Average: 5.6 (1 vote)
Essays by user Nguyễn Tiết Nghi :

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
There are many reasons to admire someone...
^^^^
Line 1, column 498, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...r because he is a perfect person for me.    My father knows how to do all kinds of t...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... forgets to take care of his children.  I not only admire my father in his work ...
^^^^
Line 3, column 486, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: He
...ped me realize and correct my mistakes. he didnt criticize or scold me. My father ...
^^
Line 3, column 489, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: didn't
... me realize and correct my mistakes. he didnt criticize or scold me. My father is als...
^^^^^
Line 4, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...rs for them without letting them roam.   I admire my father both in his work and ...
^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, besides, but, however, if, so, then, well, for example, i feel, i think, in addition, in particular, such as

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 21.0 7.0 300% => Less to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 5.0 1.00243902439 499% => Less auxiliary verb wanted.
Conjunction : 19.0 6.8 279% => Less conjunction wanted
Relative clauses : 4.0 3.15609756098 127% => OK
Pronoun: 82.0 5.60731707317 1462% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 46.0 33.7804878049 136% => OK
Nominalization: 4.0 3.97073170732 101% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2014.0 965.302439024 209% => Less number of characters wanted.
No of words: 468.0 196.424390244 238% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.30341880342 4.92477711251 87% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.65116196802 3.73543355544 125% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.48714277295 2.65546596893 94% => OK
Unique words: 210.0 106.607317073 197% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.448717948718 0.547539520022 82% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 664.2 283.868780488 234% => syllable counts are too long.
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.45097560976 96% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 30.0 1.53170731707 1959% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 4.0 4.33902439024 92% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 1.07073170732 93% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 0.482926829268 0% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 3.36585365854 119% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 37.0 8.94146341463 414% => Too many sentences.
Sentence length: 12.0 22.4926829268 53% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 35.9693075884 43.030603864 84% => OK
Chars per sentence: 54.4324324324 112.824112599 48% => More chars_per_sentence wanted.
Words per sentence: 12.6486486486 22.9334400587 55% => More words per sentence wanted.
Discourse Markers: 3.08108108108 5.23603664747 59% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 3.83414634146 104% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 1.69756097561 353% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 26.0 3.70975609756 701% => Less positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 1.13902439024 351% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.09268292683 171% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.101815880173 0.215688989381 47% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.051035287366 0.103423049105 49% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0758736957667 0.0843802449381 90% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.104461968603 0.15604864568 67% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0960722655254 0.0819641961636 117% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 5.1 13.2329268293 39% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 76.22 61.2550243902 124% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.51609756098 48% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 5.6 10.3012195122 54% => Flesch kincaid grade is low.
coleman_liau_index: 6.77 11.4140731707 59% => Coleman_liau_index is low.
dale_chall_readability_score: 6.63 8.06136585366 82% => OK
difficult_words: 71.0 40.7170731707 174% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 6.0 11.4329268293 52% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 6.8 10.9970731707 62% => OK
text_standard: 7.0 11.0658536585 63% => The average readability is low. Need to imporve the language.
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 56.1797752809 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 5.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.