Some people think the main purpose of schools is to turn people into good citizens and workers, rather than benefit them as individuals. To what extent do you agree?
It is widely claimed that training people to become a productive citizens is the initial aim of education. Although I totally agree with this view point, I also approve one of another role of school, which is to realize and develope each individual uniqueness.
On the one hand, owing to be a part of social system, education is obviously responsible for serving demand of society by developing human factors. Referred from practical state, there has existed difficult and strict requirement for each person in order to be accepted as an employer. As a result, if anyone wants to contribute for development, it won't be necessary for them to gain knowledge as well as ability enough. Schools is where learners have chances to figure out what they necessitate to own. Based on developing foundamental skill through their effort to systemize and organize information from subjects, learners are capable of adapting their apprehension to future duties. Moreover, setting a role for people to grow into efficient workers is synonymous to enhancing profit. No matter what type of education is, private or state, companies as well as corporations will take most advantages from excellent students. Response of investigation into schools is the task that learners have to create sustainable development.
On the other hand, schools not only play role of benefitting society but also has functions of personal improvement. The most important trait to define an efficient education system is focusing on potential and capacity of learners, especially children. Each individual has his own strengths and specific ability, which is only recognized and promoted in a suitable environment. True variety range of subjects, students I supplied opportunities to explore themselves, final category that they belonged to. Besides, schools can help people raise common sense of their position and commission, which then lead to provoke their effort. Once recognizing each own value, individual will concentrate on proving that they deserve becoming valuable through having great impact on many aspect social development.
In conclusion, schools has both aims mentioned, specified as turning people into constructive workers and best version of themselves. They should be put into an interrelation so as to create an overall view of education.
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 66, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[2]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'citizen'?
Suggestion: citizen
... training people to become a productive citizens is the initial aim of education. Althou...
^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 724, Rule ID: AFFORD_VBG[1]
Message: This verb is used with infinitive: 'to become'.
Suggestion: to become
...oncentrate on proving that they deserve becoming valuable through having great impact on...
^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 176, Rule ID: SO_AS_TO[1]
Message: Use simply 'to'
Suggestion: to
...hey should be put into an interrelation so as to create an overall view of education.
^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, besides, but, if, moreover, so, then, well, as to, in conclusion, as a result, as well as, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 15.0 7.0 214% => Less to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 4.0 1.00243902439 399% => Less auxiliary verb wanted.
Conjunction : 10.0 6.8 147% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 3.15609756098 253% => Less relative clauses wanted (maybe 'which' is over used).
Pronoun: 22.0 5.60731707317 392% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 54.0 33.7804878049 160% => OK
Nominalization: 15.0 3.97073170732 378% => Less nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1970.0 965.302439024 204% => Less number of characters wanted.
No of words: 362.0 196.424390244 184% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.44198895028 4.92477711251 111% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.36191444098 3.73543355544 117% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.98777052115 2.65546596893 113% => OK
Unique words: 223.0 106.607317073 209% => Less unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.616022099448 0.547539520022 113% => OK
syllable_count: 621.9 283.868780488 219% => syllable counts are too long.
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.45097560976 117% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 1.53170731707 261% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 1.0 4.33902439024 23% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 1.07073170732 280% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 0.482926829268 0% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 3.36585365854 119% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 8.94146341463 201% => Too many sentences.
Sentence length: 20.0 22.4926829268 89% => OK
Sentence length SD: 25.6361049409 43.030603864 60% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 109.444444444 112.824112599 97% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.1111111111 22.9334400587 88% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.33333333333 5.23603664747 121% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 3.83414634146 104% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 1.69756097561 177% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 3.70975609756 377% => Less positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 1.13902439024 176% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.09268292683 49% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.16918955425 0.215688989381 78% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0516120138765 0.103423049105 50% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0532319799254 0.0843802449381 63% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.111848031333 0.15604864568 72% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0311529706259 0.0819641961636 38% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.2 13.2329268293 107% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 42.72 61.2550243902 70% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 6.51609756098 172% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.3 10.3012195122 119% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.27 11.4140731707 125% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.78 8.06136585366 121% => OK
difficult_words: 118.0 40.7170731707 290% => Less difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 11.4329268293 101% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 10.9970731707 91% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.0658536585 108% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 78.6516853933 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 7.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.