In the past, sports champions used to be motivated by the desire to win a match or to break world records. These days, they are more likely to be motivated by prize money and the opportunity to be famous. What message does this send to young people and how does this attitude to sport affect the sports themselves?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
There is a general perception that earlier sportsmen used to be motivated by the desire for victory or outstanding achievements while modern sports players overlook these core values and prioritize other things, namely stardom and richness. However, this change in motivation engenders a negative impact on the young generation and even the sports itself, which will be expounded on in the following essay.
To commence with, nowadays, many football or basketball stars are receiving high incomes and popularity. Accordingly, they abandon their initial goals and lead an extravagant, unhealthy lifestyle, which in turn weakens their health and senses. Consequently, they start to lose discipline, face failures and reach an end in their careers. Furthermore, some players who are tempted by monetary gains and fame, which overshadows other motivations, will seek illegal ways to win the match such as the use of banned substances, or breweries. All of this will convey the wrong messages to everyone, not only making them believe that professional sports is merely a world running on money and fame but also changing their approach to sports and sport’s former values.
It is evident that the shift in the aim of professional athletes also modifies the structure of the sports industry. Recently, sports leagues have become commercialized with the transfer of players and different forms of advertisements. Meanwhile, companies tend to take advantage of sporting events to successfully popularise and improve their images. For example, the Euro Cup 2021 which took place in Europe was sponsored by the Coca-Cola Company; therefore, during the tournament, ubiquitous advertisements of the company were seen all over the world, raising the company’s stock price in the market. Lastly, many games now are focusing on an individual rather than a whole team, as players are becoming more self-centered and only concentrating on their appearances instead of their performances.
In conclusion, sports have truly become a form of business these days. Sportsmen are given better conditions than in the past, with high incomes and fame. These merits notwithstanding, the core values of sports, regarding healthy competitiveness, discipline, and good desires, are all forgotten. Concerning sports players’ individualism and sports industrialization’s negative effects, the government should be responsible for solving these issues and preserving the elemental values of sports.
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| 2023-08-19 | nguyenanhquan | 89 | view |
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Comments
Essay evaluations by e-grader
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 29, Rule ID: MANY_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun football seems to be countable; consider using: 'many footballs'.
Suggestion: many footballs
...ing essay. To commence with, nowadays, many football or basketball stars are receiving high ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 101, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'sports'' or 'sport's'?
Suggestion: sports'; sport's
...etes also modifies the structure of the sports industry. Recently, sports leagues have...
^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
accordingly, also, but, consequently, furthermore, however, if, lastly, look, regarding, so, therefore, while, for example, in conclusion, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 13.1623246493 106% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 4.0 7.85571142285 51% => OK
Conjunction : 21.0 10.4138276553 202% => Less conjunction wanted
Relative clauses : 8.0 7.30460921844 110% => OK
Pronoun: 21.0 24.0651302605 87% => OK
Preposition: 45.0 41.998997996 107% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 8.3376753507 72% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2109.0 1615.20841683 131% => OK
No of words: 374.0 315.596192385 119% => OK
Chars per words: 5.63903743316 5.12529762239 110% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.3976220399 4.20363070211 105% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.16767742581 2.80592935109 113% => OK
Unique words: 236.0 176.041082164 134% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.631016042781 0.561755894193 112% => OK
syllable_count: 638.1 506.74238477 126% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.60771543086 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 5.43587174349 92% => OK
Article: 3.0 2.52805611222 119% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.10420841683 48% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 0.809619238477 247% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 6.0 4.76152304609 126% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 16.0 16.0721442886 100% => OK
Sentence length: 23.0 20.2975951904 113% => OK
Sentence length SD: 56.6347604723 49.4020404114 115% => OK
Chars per sentence: 131.8125 106.682146367 124% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.375 20.7667163134 113% => OK
Discourse Markers: 9.125 7.06120827912 129% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.01903807615 40% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 8.67935871743 104% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.9879759519 75% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 3.4128256513 117% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.191873953157 0.244688304435 78% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0547129370303 0.084324248473 65% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0548696622762 0.0667982634062 82% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.121271932133 0.151304729494 80% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0721474613371 0.056905535591 127% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 16.8 13.0946893788 128% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 39.67 50.2224549098 79% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.44779559118 150% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.4 11.3001002004 119% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 15.73 12.4159519038 127% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.63 8.58950901804 112% => OK
difficult_words: 115.0 78.4519038076 147% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 15.0 9.78957915832 153% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 10.1190380762 111% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.7795591182 111% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 89.8876404494 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 8.0 Out of 9
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 29, Rule ID: MANY_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun football seems to be countable; consider using: 'many footballs'.
Suggestion: many footballs
...ing essay. To commence with, nowadays, many football or basketball stars are receiving high ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 101, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'sports'' or 'sport's'?
Suggestion: sports'; sport's
...etes also modifies the structure of the sports industry. Recently, sports leagues have...
^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
accordingly, also, but, consequently, furthermore, however, if, lastly, look, regarding, so, therefore, while, for example, in conclusion, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 13.1623246493 106% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 4.0 7.85571142285 51% => OK
Conjunction : 21.0 10.4138276553 202% => Less conjunction wanted
Relative clauses : 8.0 7.30460921844 110% => OK
Pronoun: 21.0 24.0651302605 87% => OK
Preposition: 45.0 41.998997996 107% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 8.3376753507 72% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2109.0 1615.20841683 131% => OK
No of words: 374.0 315.596192385 119% => OK
Chars per words: 5.63903743316 5.12529762239 110% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.3976220399 4.20363070211 105% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.16767742581 2.80592935109 113% => OK
Unique words: 236.0 176.041082164 134% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.631016042781 0.561755894193 112% => OK
syllable_count: 638.1 506.74238477 126% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.60771543086 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 5.43587174349 92% => OK
Article: 3.0 2.52805611222 119% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.10420841683 48% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 0.809619238477 247% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 6.0 4.76152304609 126% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 16.0 16.0721442886 100% => OK
Sentence length: 23.0 20.2975951904 113% => OK
Sentence length SD: 56.6347604723 49.4020404114 115% => OK
Chars per sentence: 131.8125 106.682146367 124% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.375 20.7667163134 113% => OK
Discourse Markers: 9.125 7.06120827912 129% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.01903807615 40% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 8.67935871743 104% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.9879759519 75% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 3.4128256513 117% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.191873953157 0.244688304435 78% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0547129370303 0.084324248473 65% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0548696622762 0.0667982634062 82% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.121271932133 0.151304729494 80% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0721474613371 0.056905535591 127% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 16.8 13.0946893788 128% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 39.67 50.2224549098 79% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.44779559118 150% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.4 11.3001002004 119% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 15.73 12.4159519038 127% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.63 8.58950901804 112% => OK
difficult_words: 115.0 78.4519038076 147% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 15.0 9.78957915832 153% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 10.1190380762 111% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.7795591182 111% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 89.8876404494 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 8.0 Out of 9
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.