Q 14: Some people think that success in life comes from hard work and determination, while others think that there are more important factors such as money and appearance. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Recently, what factors contribute to successful life has become the subject of heated debate. Some people assert that devotion to work allows people to live a better life rather than money and appearance, while others argue otherwise. Personally, I wholeheartedly agree with the former stance. In the following essay, both views will be discussed before a conclusion is reached with my opinion.
On the one hand, those who claim that fortunes and appearance are directly related to having an improved standard of living do so for several reasons. Proponents of this argument insist that people from wealthy families can gain opportunities not only to receive better education but also to operate their own business. Moreover, these people are able to invest vast sums of money in the stock market, which could lead them to earn an astronomical amount of money. Furthermore, in modern society, there are a number of celebrities who benefit a great deal from their appearance. To be more specific, influencers, including movie stars and fashion models, achieve fame and obtain wealth owing to their appearance with the development of mass media.
My opinion, however, is that dedication to work plays a vital role in individuals' success. Perhaps the most compelling reason is that employees spending huge amounts of time and energy on work are more likely to become promoted to a high position at their workplace. To exemplify, although Kim Ki-Hun, from South Korea, who was born and raised in a poor area suffered from poverty in his childhood, he became a vice president in Samsung with the help of his commitment to work. In addition, working adults passionate about work can develop invaluable skills and knowledge related to their occupations, exerting a positive influence on them building a successful career.
In conclusion, it is undeniable that there are a variety of opinions about this topic. However, after considering this matter in a careful manner, I fully support the view that work commitments make it possible for workers to have a high quality of life for the reasons discussed above.
Q 14: Some people think that success in life comes from hard work and determination, while others think that there are more important factors such as money and appearance. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Recently, what factors contribute to successful life has become the subject of heated debate. Some people assert that devotion to work allows people to live a better life rather than money and appearance, while others argue otherwise. Personally, I wholeheartedly agree with the former stance. In the following essay, both views will be discussed before a conclusion is reached with my opinion.
On the one hand, those who claim that fortunes and appearance are directly related to having an improved standard of living do so for several reasons. Proponents of this argument insist that people from wealthy families can gain opportunities not only to receive better education but also to operate their own business. Moreover, these people are able to invest vast sums of money in the stock market, which could lead them to earn an astronomical amount of money. Furthermore, in modern society, there are a number of celebrities who benefit a great deal from their appearance. To be more specific, influencers, including movie stars and fashion models, achieve fame and obtain wealth owing to their appearance with the development of mass media.
My opinion, however, is that dedication to work plays a vital role in individuals' success. Perhaps the most compelling reason is that employees spending huge amounts of time and energy on work are more likely to become promoted to a high position at their workplace. To exemplify, although Kim Ki-Hun, from South Korea, who was born and raised in a poor area suffered from poverty in his childhood, he became a vice president in Samsung with the help of his commitment to work. In addition, working adults passionate about work can develop invaluable skills and knowledge related to their occupations, exerting a positive influence on them building a successful career.
In conclusion, it is undeniable that there are a variety of opinions about this topic. However, after considering this matter in a careful manner, I fully support the view that work commitments make it possible for workers to have a high quality of life for the reasons discussed above.
Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
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2024-03-17 | Huyenlbg87 | 84 | view |
2022-08-09 | idid382021 | 89 | view |
2022-08-07 | idid382021 | 89 | view |
2022-08-04 | hellielts | 89 | view |
2021-09-19 | idid382002 | 89 | view |
- Q2 Some people believe famous people s support towards international aid organizations draws the attention to problems while others think celebrities make the problems less important Discuss both views and give your opinions 89
- Q8 As countries develop more and more people buy and use their own cars Do you think the advantages of this trend for individuals outweigh the disadvantages for the environment 89
- Q9 As countries develop more and more people buy and use their own cars Do you think the advantage of this trend for individuals outweigh the disadvantages for the environment 89
- Q10 Development in technology causes environmental problems Some people believe the solution in these problems is everyone accepts a simpler way of life while others say that technology can solve these problems Discuss both views and give your own opinion 89
- Q 19 Developing countries require help offered by international organizations to ensure healthy and sustainable developments Some people think that financial aid is important Others believe that practical aid and advice is more important Discuss both thes 89
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 9, column 127, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
Message: Consider replacing "in a careful manner" with adverb for "careful"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
... However, after considering this matter in a careful manner, I fully support the view that work com...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, furthermore, however, if, moreover, so, while, in addition, in conclusion, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 13.0 13.1623246493 99% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 4.0 7.85571142285 51% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 10.4138276553 106% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 7.30460921844 178% => OK
Pronoun: 31.0 24.0651302605 129% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 58.0 41.998997996 138% => OK
Nominalization: 15.0 8.3376753507 180% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1951.0 1615.20841683 121% => OK
No of words: 379.0 315.596192385 120% => OK
Chars per words: 5.14775725594 5.12529762239 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.41224685777 4.20363070211 105% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.75651225279 2.80592935109 98% => OK
Unique words: 234.0 176.041082164 133% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.617414248021 0.561755894193 110% => OK
syllable_count: 618.3 506.74238477 122% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.60771543086 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 5.43587174349 129% => OK
Article: 0.0 2.52805611222 0% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.10420841683 190% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 0.809619238477 0% => OK
Preposition: 9.0 4.76152304609 189% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 16.0721442886 106% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 20.2975951904 108% => OK
Sentence length SD: 49.0652415043 49.4020404114 99% => OK
Chars per sentence: 114.764705882 106.682146367 108% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.2941176471 20.7667163134 107% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.47058823529 7.06120827912 77% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.38176352705 114% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.01903807615 20% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 8.67935871743 150% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.9879759519 25% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 3.4128256513 88% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.392522879696 0.244688304435 160% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.114817102233 0.084324248473 136% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.149421864558 0.0667982634062 224% => The coherence between sentences is low.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.260849460995 0.151304729494 172% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.265680799127 0.056905535591 467% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.0 13.0946893788 107% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 49.15 50.2224549098 98% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.44779559118 42% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 11.3001002004 105% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.89 12.4159519038 104% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.44 8.58950901804 110% => OK
difficult_words: 113.0 78.4519038076 144% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 9.78957915832 82% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 10.1190380762 107% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.7795591182 102% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 89.8876404494 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 8.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.