Q2 Some people believe famous people s support towards international aid organizations draws attention to problems Others think celebrities make the problems less important Discuss both views and give your opinion

Essay topics:

Q2 : Some people believe famous people’s support towards international aid organizations draws attention to problems. Others think celebrities make the problems less important. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Recently, the impact of celebrities' assistance, such as donations, on individual people has become the subject of heated debate. Some people assert that influencers can contribute to an increase in the level of attention to social problems by supporting charities, while others argue otherwise. Personally, I wholeheartedly agree with the former stance. In the following essay, both views will be discussed before a conclusion is reached with my opinion.

On the one hand, those who claim that renowned people helping socially disadvantaged people detrimentally affect individuals do so for several reasons. Proponents of this argument insist that some entertainers exploit charitable activities in an undesirable way, causing ordinary people to become less interested in social issues. As an illustration, Kim Ki-Hun who is a singer in South Korea patronised a charitable foundation, and as a result, he achieved fame. However, according to an article released by the Seoul Times, it turned out that the main reason for this donation was receiving tax waivers. Given these points, some people hold the view that well-known people can worsen the essence of aid.

My opinion, however, is that celebrities' help towards charitable institutions exerts a beneficial influence on everyday people. Perhaps the most compelling reason is that not only can public figures inform the masses of the importance of charitable work, but they are also able to raise awareness amongst the public considering that they are often exposed to media. Furthermore, a multitude of fans of celebrities have a predisposition to participate in financial support when their idols partake in it. To exemplify, Lionel Messi spent approximately 3 million US dollars on a charitable organisation in South Africa in order to alleviate global hunger in 2015, leading a myriad of his keen supporters across the globe to pay attention to poverty, which made it possible for them to donate 5 million US dollars. In light of the above, I find these more persuasive.

In conclusion, it is undeniable that there are a variety of opinions about this topic. However, after considering this matter in a careful manner, I fully support the view that famous people's assistance brings with it positives for the reasons discussed above.

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Average: 8.9 (1 vote)
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Essays by user idid382003 :

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 241, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
Message: Consider replacing "in an undesirable way" with adverb for "undesirable"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
...ertainers exploit charitable activities in an undesirable way, causing ordinary people to become less...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 127, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
Message: Consider replacing "in a careful manner" with adverb for "careful"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
... However, after considering this matter in a careful manner, I fully support the view that famous p...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 185, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'peoples'' or 'people's'?
Suggestion: peoples'; people's
...r, I fully support the view that famous peoples assistance brings with it positives for...
^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, furthermore, however, if, so, well, while, in conclusion, such as, as a result

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 10.0 13.1623246493 76% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 4.0 7.85571142285 51% => OK
Conjunction : 2.0 10.4138276553 19% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 14.0 7.30460921844 192% => OK
Pronoun: 35.0 24.0651302605 145% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 55.0 41.998997996 131% => OK
Nominalization: 13.0 8.3376753507 156% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1939.0 1615.20841683 120% => OK
No of words: 362.0 315.596192385 115% => OK
Chars per words: 5.35635359116 5.12529762239 105% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.36191444098 4.20363070211 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.03591160221 2.80592935109 108% => OK
Unique words: 230.0 176.041082164 131% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.635359116022 0.561755894193 113% => OK
syllable_count: 626.4 506.74238477 124% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.60771543086 106% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 5.43587174349 147% => OK
Article: 2.0 2.52805611222 79% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.10420841683 143% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 0.809619238477 247% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 8.0 4.76152304609 168% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 16.0 16.0721442886 100% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 20.2975951904 108% => OK
Sentence length SD: 62.0327219599 49.4020404114 126% => OK
Chars per sentence: 121.1875 106.682146367 114% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.625 20.7667163134 109% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.5625 7.06120827912 79% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.01903807615 60% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 8.67935871743 115% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.9879759519 50% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 3.4128256513 117% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.252624145779 0.244688304435 103% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0705565349557 0.084324248473 84% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.064710394593 0.0667982634062 97% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.146001629631 0.151304729494 96% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0576173748272 0.056905535591 101% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.1 13.0946893788 115% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 40.69 50.2224549098 81% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.44779559118 150% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.1 11.3001002004 116% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.1 12.4159519038 114% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.96 8.58950901804 116% => OK
difficult_words: 120.0 78.4519038076 153% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 9.0 9.78957915832 92% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 10.1190380762 107% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.7795591182 102% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 89.8876404494 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 8.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.