Some people think young people should be free to choose their job, while others believe that they should be realistic and think about their future.
Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Choosing jobs has been a headache to young generation nowadays. It is argued that young people should be free to choose their job, while others think that they should be realistic and consider about their future. In my perspective, both arguments are reasonable for some reasons.
There are certainly some reasons why young people should be free to choose their job. One of the reasons is that young people can have more potential of becoming productive if they are allowed to choose their job freely. This is because they are likely to contribute more efforts on doing research in the fields they are interested. This also increases the work efficiency of their company. Another reason is that young people can easily achieve good results. As youngsters have wide range of knowledge about the thing they love, such knowledge can benefit for their future careers.
However, there are opposing voices saying that young people should be realistic and think about their future. If young people can choose their ideal job, they would have a sense of fulfillments. However, some professions are poorly paid. Artists, for example, although they have many amazing arts pieces, they still go to Centrelink for allowances to sustain their lives. Apart from this, young people should think of long term job because it will give them stable income. Having decent jobs such as accountants in listed company, youngsters no longer need to worry about their financial problems because they will get paid handsomely every months.
In conclusion, although young people can have a sense of happiness and fulfillments of choosing their job freely, I still think that youngsters should put more concern about their future careers which allows them to maintain their lives.
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Sentence: Artists, for example, although they have many amazing arts pieces, they still go to Centrelink for allowances to sustain their lives.
Description: A noun, plural, common is not usually followed by a noun, plural, common
Suggestion: Refer to arts and pieces
careers which allows them to maintain their lives.
careers which allow them to maintain their lives.
flaws:
No. of Different Words: 148 200
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.0 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 2 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 9 2
No. of Sentences: 16 15
No. of Words: 286 350
No. of Characters: 1435 1500
No. of Different Words: 148 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.112 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.017 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.32 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 105 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 63 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 40 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 28 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 17.875 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.968 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.625 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.357 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.507 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.095 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5