Do you believe that professional athletes make good role models for young people

Essay topics:

Do you believe that professional athletes make good role models for young people?

These days, most of the young people imitate the style and the method of athletes’ life, thinking of them as role models. In my opinion, sportsmen can be inspiring role models from the perspective of healthy life and hard attempts, nevertheless, those models can lead young ones to various wrong ways as well.

Athletes who have a healthy lifestyle, and who never give up on their goals can be efficient heroes for teenagers. Living healthy, exercising regularly, and eating healthy food are the bold characteristics of athletes, which are very helpful for their followers. Choosing athletes as role models, youngsters try to do sports and eat healthy food, which is highly beneficial to their physical health. At the same time, sportsmen are famous for their persistence in struggling, continuous practices and stamina to achieve their targets. Therefore, their teenage fans learn that if they want to reach their dreams, they have to work hard and never stop trying for their goals.

However, sportsmen who want to reach fame and wealth by attracting media attention, also who cheat to win, can be harmful role models. Recently, many athletes try to be popular and wealthy by participating in advertisements in the media. Consequently, young people who follow them may misunderstand that making money is the priority for their role models, and they only focus on this side of being athletes rather than their efficient attributes. Secondly, some famous athletes use drugs in their games in order to perform better and win the match. Copying this detrimental trend, many teenagers in the US get used to doping before their exams or sports matches, which is really disadvantageous for their both mental and physical health.

In conclusion, since athletes have become role models for young people, I believe that they can be both efficient and harmful heroes. Although living healthy and attempting hard for goals can be learned from sportsmen, but aiming for popularity and wealth in media, and cheating for winning the games, can be learned by youngsters too, which are not desirable outcomes.

Votes
Average: 5.5 (5 votes)
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Essays by user negardavoodi :

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...g ones to various wrong ways as well. Athletes who have a healthy lifestyle, a...
^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, consequently, however, if, may, nevertheless, really, second, secondly, so, therefore, well, in conclusion, in my opinion

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 15.0 13.1623246493 114% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 7.85571142285 102% => OK
Conjunction : 18.0 10.4138276553 173% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 7.30460921844 164% => OK
Pronoun: 29.0 24.0651302605 121% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 37.0 41.998997996 88% => OK
Nominalization: 2.0 8.3376753507 24% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1771.0 1615.20841683 110% => OK
No of words: 341.0 315.596192385 108% => OK
Chars per words: 5.1935483871 5.12529762239 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.29722995808 4.20363070211 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.73425775955 2.80592935109 97% => OK
Unique words: 189.0 176.041082164 107% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.554252199413 0.561755894193 99% => OK
syllable_count: 520.2 506.74238477 103% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.60771543086 93% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 5.43587174349 92% => OK
Article: 0.0 2.52805611222 0% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.10420841683 95% => OK
Conjunction: 5.0 0.809619238477 618% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 4.0 4.76152304609 84% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 14.0 16.0721442886 87% => OK
Sentence length: 24.0 20.2975951904 118% => OK
Sentence length SD: 38.8296252354 49.4020404114 79% => OK
Chars per sentence: 126.5 106.682146367 119% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.3571428571 20.7667163134 117% => OK
Discourse Markers: 9.42857142857 7.06120827912 134% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.01903807615 20% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 8.67935871743 127% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.9879759519 50% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 3.4128256513 29% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.232010940024 0.244688304435 95% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0913679605309 0.084324248473 108% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0712441194463 0.0667982634062 107% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.158599663307 0.151304729494 105% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0403951128685 0.056905535591 71% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.2 13.0946893788 116% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 55.58 50.2224549098 111% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.44779559118 118% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 11.3001002004 102% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.12 12.4159519038 106% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.86 8.58950901804 103% => OK
difficult_words: 87.0 78.4519038076 111% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 9.78957915832 112% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 10.1190380762 115% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.7795591182 111% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 73.0337078652 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 6.5 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.