Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
If people have the opportunity to get a secure job, they should take it right away rather than wait for a job that would be more satisfying.
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer
In today's modern world, having a good job is of great importance.because not only a good job does bring us happiness, but also it could attache our life to the most sophesticated society levels. I personally adhere to the view that it is better to wait for a satisfying job rather than get aimmediately a secure but a low level job. The following paragraphs will elaborate more on this issue.
To start with, being interested in our career is of great importance. To be successful in upcoming years of our life, we should follow our dreams and our altimate goals. because growing up, we become exhousted of what we do without any interest. although a secure job could bring us an arrey of merits, in longterm will become frustrating for us to continue some career which we are not interested in. To put this in more vivid picture, let us consider a situation in which a young man find a decent job in a bank. he is aware of his mental posision and his capacity for long and monatery works. In fact, he is not able to handle a laborious task of sitting behind a desk. However, he consider that this is a well-paid job. Hence he accept it. Nevertheless.after only a few years he will resign from his job, searching for a new and more exciting career, perhaps in an atelier of photography. this kind of job is his actuall interest, what he really excpected from his childhood. In art works he is more talented. this is, therefore, crystally clear that he should has been waited, from the first, for this artistic work.
Frome aother point of view, the more we have patience the more we get better chance to find more rewarding jobs. In today's competitive world, it is crucial to become sophesticated in a field of work by continuing our education in higher levels in good universities. although it is possible that we find a secure job after graduation from highschool, it is more sensible that in youth we continue our education to top levels to find a superior job. Due to the fact that the top-notch companies have a very competetive addmission, graduated students in phd or masters, from top ranked universities have more chance to get a job in these companies. As an in-depth study conducted in some developed countries indicated, The hefty of the people who earn a promissing job in great companies in these countries are the graduated students from top 50 universties in the world. Thereby, as far as I am concerened, it is more reasonable to develope our knowledg and wait for a better job beacause a decent and satisfying job has a profound influence over our entire life.
Drawn upon the aforementioned reason, people should wait for a promissing job because an only secure job is not enough for the whole life. Not only waiting for a satisfying job could make us happier in our future life, but also by continuing our study we can get to higher level vacancies in top-notch companies. whic hcan make us wealthy a the end.
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2020-01-28 | supergirl20 | 60 | view |
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 171, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Because
...llow our dreams and our altimate goals. because growing up, we become exhousted of what...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 248, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Although
...ed of what we do without any interest. although a secure job could bring us an arrey of...
^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 388, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...to continue some career which we are not interested in. To put this in more vivid...
^^
Line 3, column 518, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: He
... young man find a decent job in a bank. he is aware of his mental posision and his...
^^
Line 3, column 688, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[1]
Message: The pronoun 'he' must be used with a third-person verb: 'considers'.
Suggestion: considers
...k of sitting behind a desk. However, he consider that this is a well-paid job. Hence he ...
^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 727, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Hence,
... consider that this is a well-paid job. Hence he accept it. Nevertheless.after only a...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 736, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[1]
Message: The pronoun 'he' must be used with a third-person verb: 'accepts'.
Suggestion: accepts
... that this is a well-paid job. Hence he accept it. Nevertheless.after only a few years...
^^^^^^
Line 3, column 747, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Nevertheless,
...is a well-paid job. Hence he accept it. Nevertheless.after only a few years he will resign f...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 896, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: This
..., perhaps in an atelier of photography. this kind of job is his actuall interest, wh...
^^^^
Line 3, column 1017, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: This
...hood. In art works he is more talented. this is, therefore, crystally clear that he ...
^^^^
Line 3, column 1068, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[2]
Message: The verb 'should' requires the base form of the verb: 'have'
Suggestion: have
...erefore, crystally clear that he should has been waited, from the first, for this a...
^^^
Line 5, column 267, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Although
... in higher levels in good universities. although it is possible that we find a secure jo...
^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 529, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...nies have a very competetive addmission, graduated students in phd or masters, fr...
^^
Line 7, column 314, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Whic
...level vacancies in top-notch companies. whic hcan make us wealthy a the end.
^^^^
Line 7, column 340, Rule ID: DT_DT[1]
Message: Maybe you need to remove one determiner so that only 'a' or 'the' is left.
Suggestion: a; the
...ch companies. whic hcan make us wealthy a the end.
^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, hence, however, if, nevertheless, really, so, therefore, well, in fact, kind of, to start with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 15.1003584229 126% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 9.8082437276 102% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 13.8261648746 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 11.0286738351 82% => OK
Pronoun: 62.0 43.0788530466 144% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 70.0 52.1666666667 134% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 8.0752688172 99% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2415.0 1977.66487455 122% => OK
No of words: 521.0 407.700716846 128% => OK
Chars per words: 4.63531669866 4.8611393121 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.77759609229 4.48103885553 107% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.83554028036 2.67179642975 106% => OK
Unique words: 246.0 212.727598566 116% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.47216890595 0.524837075471 90% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 770.4 618.680645161 125% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 9.59856630824 115% => OK
Article: 3.0 3.08781362007 97% => OK
Subordination: 7.0 3.51792114695 199% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 11.0 4.94265232975 223% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 25.0 20.6003584229 121% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 20.1344086022 99% => OK
Sentence length SD: 56.7553909334 48.9658058833 116% => OK
Chars per sentence: 96.6 100.406767564 96% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.84 20.6045352989 101% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.48 5.45110844103 82% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 15.0 5.5376344086 271% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 18.0 11.8709677419 152% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.85842293907 52% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.88709677419 102% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.264820908505 0.236089414692 112% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0793356410777 0.076458572812 104% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0630667359327 0.0737576698707 86% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.19335959825 0.150856017488 128% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0379482872006 0.0645574589148 59% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.8 11.7677419355 92% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 59.64 58.1214874552 103% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 10.1575268817 97% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.63 10.9000537634 88% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.81 8.01818996416 97% => OK
difficult_words: 105.0 86.8835125448 121% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 10.0537634409 99% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 10.247311828 98% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.