Do you agree or disagree? If people have the opportunity to get a secure job, they should take it right away rather than wait for a job that would be more satisfying

Essay topics:

Do you agree or disagree? If people have the opportunity to get a secure job, they should take it right away rather than wait for a job that would be more satisfying

Modernization has been always a demanding challenge in many parts of world. In term of working, it is suggested that career is important part of human life. Whether or not people ought to choose safe duty or pleasure jobs is controversial. According what I generally believe, having protected career is more important than satisfy job, because opportunity of safe job is limited and with safe job human can learn skill. The following paragraphs by containing the main reasons, will substantiate my viewpoint.

The main reasons why I believe that safe career is most important of safe job is because chance of secret job is bounded. To elaborate on my point, since number of job seekers are increasing, it is important to have safe jobs with fixed salary. In this age people really need money to attain goal and continuing life. In other word, the economic situation of the country is the prominent factor effecting people's preferences in choosing occupation. In my country, IRAN, the poor economic situation forces most industries to lay-off or even closure. Increased number of unemployed people and unstable economic situation compel the people to concentrate on finding a job that meet their expenses. A significant example that strikes my mind is about my life. When my brother graduated from university, he really wanted suitable jobs. After several time he was able to find secret jobs, but he did not pleasure feel about career. In this situation have safe jobs is impotent not satisfying about job.

In addition, I believe that people with certain jobs, after sometimes they find comfortable sense for duty. Employer with safe jobs not only gain experience but also learn skill. Therefore, they can use this experience for starting own company and jobs. Owing to having valuable knowledge, they would have success company. A quite clear example would be my friends' business. When my friend wanted start work, she went to Barezz Company. She did not like jobs, but it was safe career. Thus, she decided work at Barezz Co. and gain experience and skill. After 5 years, she could stablish her own association and she is really success person.

To conclude, I generally hold the opinion that protected career is the best choice for having duty. In this age competition for attain safe job is higher than past; as result, it is significant to have safe jobs. Also, people can gain experience and earn skill.

Votes
Average: 7 (1 vote)
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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 158, Rule ID: WHETHER[7]
Message: Perhaps you can shorten this phrase to just 'Whether'. It is correct though if you mean 'regardless of whether'.
Suggestion: Whether
...career is important part of human life. Whether or not people ought to choose safe duty or ple...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 450, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
...les preferences in choosing occupation. In my country, IRAN, the poor economic sit...
^^
Line 3, column 838, Rule ID: MANY_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun time seems to be countable; consider using: 'several times'.
Suggestion: several times
..., he really wanted suitable jobs. After several time he was able to find secret jobs, but he...
^^^^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, if, really, so, therefore, thus, in addition

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 21.0 15.1003584229 139% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 9.8082437276 92% => OK
Conjunction : 14.0 13.8261648746 101% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 11.0286738351 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 39.0 43.0788530466 91% => OK
Preposition: 48.0 52.1666666667 92% => OK
Nominalization: 13.0 8.0752688172 161% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2019.0 1977.66487455 102% => OK
No of words: 403.0 407.700716846 99% => OK
Chars per words: 5.00992555831 4.8611393121 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.48049772903 4.48103885553 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.62444693975 2.67179642975 98% => OK
Unique words: 209.0 212.727598566 98% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.518610421836 0.524837075471 99% => OK
syllable_count: 627.3 618.680645161 101% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 12.0 9.59856630824 125% => OK
Article: 6.0 3.08781362007 194% => OK
Subordination: 8.0 3.51792114695 227% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 3.0 1.86738351254 161% => OK
Preposition: 14.0 4.94265232975 283% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 27.0 20.6003584229 131% => OK
Sentence length: 14.0 20.1344086022 70% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 30.6751643263 48.9658058833 63% => OK
Chars per sentence: 74.7777777778 100.406767564 74% => OK
Words per sentence: 14.9259259259 20.6045352989 72% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.03703703704 5.45110844103 37% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 17.0 11.8709677419 143% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 3.85842293907 156% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.88709677419 82% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.222645477157 0.236089414692 94% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0615200853884 0.076458572812 80% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0686383436291 0.0737576698707 93% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.148913288765 0.150856017488 99% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0223302010335 0.0645574589148 35% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 9.6 11.7677419355 82% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 57.27 58.1214874552 99% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.8 10.1575268817 87% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.19 10.9000537634 103% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.7 8.01818996416 96% => OK
difficult_words: 86.0 86.8835125448 99% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 10.002688172 80% => OK
gunning_fog: 7.6 10.0537634409 76% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 10.247311828 78% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.