If you could change one important thing about your hometown, what would you change. Use reason and specific examples to support your answer.

Essay topics:

If you could change one important thing about your hometown, what would you change. Use reason and specific examples to support your answer.

“Heath is Wealth”, we all knows the importance of health. In every person’s life health is a primarily important think, for maintain well human health it is necessary to offer a good service about health, to invent new technologies which are important to maintain human health. When I got a chance to change one important thing about my hometown, I would like to change health policies and offer good health services. The reasons of that change explain in following essay.

Many people are died because of the unavailability of treatment on a proper time on a proper place. Some of also dies only of insufficient money for hospitalization, also there are unavailability of medical instruments and the doctor. In my hometown there is one government hospital, in that hospital the availability of medical tools and instrument is less that’s why many of people turns toward the city for to save life. City is far long from my hometown, and it has much chance to die serious patient when he doesn’t get an instant treatment. I am already seen this type of many cases in my hometown. When I was a sixteen years old my neighbor uncle has a heart attack and he is dies because only of insufficient medical tools and instrument in hospital.

Also many people die because of unavailability of doctor in government hospital. In government hospital government appoint doctor, but in my hometown’s hospital the doctor is always unavailable in hospital because doctor has a privet hospital in city. He is spend more his time in his privet hospital and he is also suggest my hometown’s people to come in his privet hospital, he do better treatment of them over there. When I got a chance then I do strict action on that type of doctor.

In conclusion, when I got a chance to work on change one thing, I would like to prefer health issue in my hometown. I would like to change all old medical tools and instrument with latest in hospital and take strict actions against the doctor who is not present in hospital daily.

Votes
Average: 6.1 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
'Heath is Wealth', we all know...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 59, Rule ID: NON3PRS_VERB[2]
Message: The pronoun 'we' must be used with a non-third-person form of a verb: 'know'
Suggestion: know
... 'Heath is Wealth', we all knows the importance of health. In every pers...
^^^^^
Line 1, column 511, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...that change explain in following essay. Many people are ...
^^^^
Line 5, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...cal tools and instrument in hospital. Also many people die because of unavaila...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 23, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Also,
...nt in hospital. Also many people die because of unavailabili...
^^^^
Line 5, column 286, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'spent'.
Suggestion: spent
...or has a privet hospital in city. He is spend more his time in his privet hospital an...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 344, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'suggested'.
Suggestion: suggested
...e in his privet hospital and he is also suggest my hometown's people to come in hi...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 413, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[1]
Message: The pronoun 'he' must be used with a third-person verb: 'does'.
Suggestion: does
...ople to come in his privet hospital, he do better treatment of them over there. Wh...
^^
Line 5, column 453, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “When” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...do better treatment of them over there. When I got a chance then I do strict action ...
^^^^
Line 7, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...strict action on that type of doctor. In conclusion, when I got a chance to wo...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 302, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...r who is not present in hospital daily.
^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, if, so, then, well, in conclusion

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 15.0 15.1003584229 99% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 3.0 9.8082437276 31% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 13.8261648746 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 11.0286738351 100% => OK
Pronoun: 34.0 43.0788530466 79% => OK
Preposition: 57.0 52.1666666667 109% => OK
Nominalization: 12.0 8.0752688172 149% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1697.0 1977.66487455 86% => OK
No of words: 351.0 407.700716846 86% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.83475783476 4.8611393121 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.32839392791 4.48103885553 97% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.98144302718 2.67179642975 112% => OK
Unique words: 157.0 212.727598566 74% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.447293447293 0.524837075471 85% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 545.4 618.680645161 88% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 9.59856630824 73% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.94265232975 121% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 16.0 20.6003584229 78% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 21.0 20.1344086022 104% => OK
Sentence length SD: 50.5525716458 48.9658058833 103% => OK
Chars per sentence: 106.0625 100.406767564 106% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.9375 20.6045352989 106% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.75 5.45110844103 50% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 11.0 5.5376344086 199% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 11.8709677419 67% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.85842293907 104% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.88709677419 82% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.10886593466 0.236089414692 46% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0460891603502 0.076458572812 60% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0587586106456 0.0737576698707 80% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0800111515344 0.150856017488 53% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0555117799539 0.0645574589148 86% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.3 11.7677419355 105% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 50.16 58.1214874552 86% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 10.1575268817 113% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.73 10.9000537634 98% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 6.93 8.01818996416 86% => OK
difficult_words: 50.0 86.8835125448 58% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 10.0537634409 103% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 61.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 18.5 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.