Some adults believe that nowadays children’s behavior is worse than children’s behavior was in the past. These adults have suggested three actions that parents can do to help children ages 5-10 behave better ( for example by speaking more respectfully to adults or acting more kindly toward others). Which one action that parents can do might have the most positive effect on their children’s behavior? Why?
– limiting the types of television programs and movies their children can watch.
– spending more time talking with their children.
– supervising or monitoring more closely what their children do when they play with their friends.
Since the creation of man, people have been trying to train their children as well as they could. Today, most people wonder whether what is the best action that parents can do to help children ages 5-10 behave better. In my opinion, spending more time talking with them would be a better approach because unlike two other choices it doesn’t hurt children's freedom; thus, it would be more efficient. Moreover, they will learn how to act well from you. I will illustrate my reasons in the following paragraphs.
First, not affecting children’s freedom at all, spending more time talking with children would be more effective. Indeed, every human especially children may guard against something that limits their freedom; thus, the other options may negatively affect them. On the contrary, you can get a good result by talking with them in kindly words. For example, when I was 8 years old, I had an extremely impolite friend talking in an insulting way; thereby, others could hardly tolerate him. Indeed, he was punished a lot because of his bad behavior. His parents had been trying several methods, including limiting his friendships and tv programs that he was allowed to watch, to teach him how to behave well before they talked to a children counselor. He told them that children tend to oppose these kinds of actions; Indeed, he advised them to spend more time talking with him warmly and try to become more close to him. Surprisingly, after a couple of months, this plan helped him to change his behavior gradually.
Second, by spending more time with kids, there is more chance for them to learn how to behave well from you. According to a Japanese idiom, should want you to teach a behavior to your child, you must first behave in that way and they will learn themselves step by step. Therefore, by spending more time with children you give them more chances to analyze your behavior and learn them from you. For instance, when I was a child my parents talked with me a lot and explained everything to me. Indeed, when I did a wrong act like lying about something, they tried to talk with me kindly and convince me that it wasn’t a proper action instead of talking aggressively and limiting me. Indeed, in most of our relatives’ opinions, they did a great job by teaching me how to behave with other people well. Hence, if they had not spent time to talk with me, I would have been faced with their wish and never have I been learned to behave well.
Based on the aforementioned reasons, it can be concluded that allocating more extra time to children talking with them would a better choice for parents to teach their children how to behave well.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 428, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
Message: Consider replacing "in an insulting way" with adverb for "insulting"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
...ad an extremely impolite friend talking in an insulting way; thereby, others could hardly tolerate ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 337, Rule ID: CHANCE_CHANGE[1]
Message: Did you mean 'changes'?
Suggestion: changes
...e time with children you give them more chances to analyze your behavior and learn them...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
first, hence, if, may, moreover, second, so, therefore, thus, well, for example, for instance, as well as, in my opinion, on the contrary
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 15.1003584229 93% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 17.0 9.8082437276 173% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 13.8261648746 58% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 10.0 11.0286738351 91% => OK
Pronoun: 74.0 43.0788530466 172% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 67.0 52.1666666667 128% => OK
Nominalization: 2.0 8.0752688172 25% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2215.0 1977.66487455 112% => OK
No of words: 467.0 407.700716846 115% => OK
Chars per words: 4.74304068522 4.8611393121 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.64867537961 4.48103885553 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.49855040073 2.67179642975 94% => OK
Unique words: 227.0 212.727598566 107% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.48608137045 0.524837075471 93% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 659.7 618.680645161 107% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 15.0 9.59856630824 156% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 3.51792114695 171% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 9.0 4.94265232975 182% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 20.6003584229 102% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 20.1344086022 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 45.060956447 48.9658058833 92% => OK
Chars per sentence: 105.476190476 100.406767564 105% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.2380952381 20.6045352989 108% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.52380952381 5.45110844103 120% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 16.0 11.8709677419 135% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.88709677419 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.239498274134 0.236089414692 101% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0853759858614 0.076458572812 112% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0692763458347 0.0737576698707 94% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.186500780839 0.150856017488 124% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0386743279319 0.0645574589148 60% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.0 11.7677419355 102% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 66.07 58.1214874552 114% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 10.1575268817 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.51 10.9000537634 96% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.5 8.01818996416 94% => OK
difficult_words: 82.0 86.8835125448 94% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 7.5 10.002688172 75% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 10.0537634409 107% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 10.247311828 78% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.