Some people believe that when busy parents do not have a lot of time to spend with their children, the best use of that time is to have fun playing games or sports. Others believe that it is best to use that time doing things together that are related to schoolwork. Which of the two approaches do you prefer? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Today, as the economic conditions changed, parents are mostly engaged in daily activities and time-consuming occupations, and devoting time to their children has become a problem. Parents have different arguments about how they spend this short time with their children; some do entertainment activities, and others supervise children’s homework. I personally agree with the first choice because hobbies increase intimacy and closeness between parents and children, and enable parents to teach their children something as important as the school lessons.
Intimacy and closeness are excellent properties in the relationship between parents and children that is obtained by recreation. Since they are playing, parents can realize the expectations and favorites of their child. They find answers to these questions about what kind of game their child may like and what activities make them happy. Enhancing parent’s perceptions about their child leads to becoming more friendly to them. When a child notices him/her parents’ attention, he/she feels more comfortable and senses closer to them. It is noteworthy that a deep relationship between parent and student has benefits in children learning quality. In addition, while controlling school activities can be obtained by hiring others, forming this closeness by other persons rather than parents cannot be beneficial. Thus, gaming and sports make relations more friendly for both parents and children.
The closeness sensation isn’t the only advantage playing have; besides, father and mother can teach their baby many valuable lessons during the playing process. Some competitions and games contain essential life skills, which are as necessary as education. Bravery, kindness, vitality are a few samples of attributes obtained from games. When a child loses a game, she/he learns that failure is not a sign of inability and tries to win next time, which helps to encounter life problems. The play exposes children to diverse situations. Therefore they have to make decisions that consequently enable them how to react in such conditions. Plus, doing sport and kinetic games make children healthier, and they grow mentally. Accordingly, by playing, parents provide another school for children besides the usual school.
To conclude, parents can become closer to their children and teach them many things if they allocate their free time to play with their children. Furthermore, they can cover and handle schoolwork by hiring another person.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 539, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Therefore,
...exposes children to diverse situations. Therefore they have to make decisions that conseq...
^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
accordingly, besides, but, consequently, first, furthermore, if, may, so, therefore, thus, while, in addition, kind of
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 10.0 15.1003584229 66% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 9.8082437276 71% => OK
Conjunction : 21.0 13.8261648746 152% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 11.0286738351 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 37.0 43.0788530466 86% => OK
Preposition: 42.0 52.1666666667 81% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 8.0752688172 74% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2139.0 1977.66487455 108% => OK
No of words: 379.0 407.700716846 93% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.6437994723 4.8611393121 116% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.41224685777 4.48103885553 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.77589613931 2.67179642975 104% => OK
Unique words: 217.0 212.727598566 102% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.572559366755 0.524837075471 109% => OK
syllable_count: 628.2 618.680645161 102% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.51630824373 112% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 9.59856630824 63% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.86738351254 214% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 4.0 4.94265232975 81% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 20.6003584229 102% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 20.1344086022 89% => OK
Sentence length SD: 39.7538914081 48.9658058833 81% => OK
Chars per sentence: 101.857142857 100.406767564 101% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.0476190476 20.6045352989 88% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.61904761905 5.45110844103 103% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.5376344086 18% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 16.0 11.8709677419 135% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.88709677419 82% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.274165703464 0.236089414692 116% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0824715515722 0.076458572812 108% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0717254998421 0.0737576698707 97% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.189669493847 0.150856017488 126% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0659839976943 0.0645574589148 102% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.2 11.7677419355 121% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 44.75 58.1214874552 77% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 10.1575268817 113% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 15.14 10.9000537634 139% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.95 8.01818996416 112% => OK
difficult_words: 106.0 86.8835125448 122% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 15.0 10.002688172 150% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 10.0537634409 92% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 83.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 25.0 Out of 30
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.