As a student of university that has a long break between university semesters, the university requires all students to do one of the following for one month during the break:1、Students must take a course on the subject that has no direct connection to t

Essay topics:

As a student of university that has a long break between university semesters, the university requires all students to do one of the following for one month during the break:

1、Students must take a course on the subject that has no direct connection to their majors of study ( For example, a student majoring in engineering may take course in fine arts or social science.)

2、Students must volunteer to work in the university’s city or their hometowns to improve some aspects of life of the city or their own town. ( For example, students may help local primary school children with their homework.)

Which one do you think is more beneficial for students in their university? Why? Given detailed examples and reasons. Use your OWN words, do NOT use memorized examples.

Most of the universities have a long break between university semesters. During the vocation, students are supported to do something meaningful to promote their personality. There is a couple of choice: taking a course that has no direct connection to their majors or being volunteers to work in the city. I believe that working in the city is more beneficial for students.

First of all, being volunteers to work in the city are beneficial for students to accumulate job experiences. Most of the Students do not understand how to find jobs after they graduated. If they being volunteer to work in the city during the vacation, they will lay a solid foundation for the future and may have the opportunity to obtain a permanent job after they graduated from universities. For example, students may help local primacy school children with their homework. They can not only accumulate the experiences to be teachers, but also improve their social relationship. When they graduate, the school’s president may invite them to teach children in their school.

In addition, it is a waste of time for students to take courses which has no connection to their major. Most of students would not like to take extra courses, because it is a burden for them. They learned this new knowledge, but there is no place for them to utilize in their life or work. For example, a student whose major subject is math, but he is required to study art in the holiday. There is no doubt he cannot use art in the future, therefor it is just a waste of time.

Admittedly, the course they take may be helpful in their future to some extent. Some students can combine these two subjects to make their work more successful. For instance, my brother is an actor who always show some plays on stage. He took a Chinese class before and he always use poem to present his mind in his performers. Hence the Chinese class which has no direct connection with his major is helpful for his major.

In the nutshell, compared with taking extra classes, being volunteers to work in the city has more merits. I believe that work in the city is more beneficial for students.

Votes
Average: 6.5 (1 vote)
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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 9, column 105, Rule ID: MOST_SOME_OF_NNS[1]
Message: After 'Most of', you should use 'the' ('Most of the students') or simply say ''Most students''.
Suggestion: Most of the students; Most students
...which has no connection to their major. Most of students would not like to take extra courses, b...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 13, column 281, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[3]
Message: The pronoun 'he' must be used with a third-person verb: 'uses'.
Suggestion: uses
...ok a Chinese class before and he always use poem to present his mind in his perform...
^^^
Line 13, column 329, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Hence,
... to present his mind in his performers. Hence the Chinese class which has no direct c...
^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, hence, if, may, so, for example, for instance, in addition, no doubt, first of all

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 20.0 15.1003584229 132% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 9.8082437276 92% => OK
Conjunction : 7.0 13.8261648746 51% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 8.0 11.0286738351 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 39.0 43.0788530466 91% => OK
Preposition: 53.0 52.1666666667 102% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 8.0752688172 99% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1784.0 1977.66487455 90% => OK
No of words: 373.0 407.700716846 91% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.78284182306 4.8611393121 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.39467950092 4.48103885553 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.67484018842 2.67179642975 100% => OK
Unique words: 179.0 212.727598566 84% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.479892761394 0.524837075471 91% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 553.5 618.680645161 89% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 9.59856630824 83% => OK
Article: 3.0 3.08781362007 97% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.51792114695 85% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.86738351254 161% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.94265232975 61% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 20.6003584229 107% => OK
Sentence length: 16.0 20.1344086022 79% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 28.7917860187 48.9658058833 59% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 81.0909090909 100.406767564 81% => OK
Words per sentence: 16.9545454545 20.6045352989 82% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.54545454545 5.45110844103 83% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 11.8709677419 118% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 3.85842293907 130% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.264782142117 0.236089414692 112% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0876745264494 0.076458572812 115% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0873106901843 0.0737576698707 118% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.160754763841 0.150856017488 107% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.115805949623 0.0645574589148 179% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 9.6 11.7677419355 82% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 63.7 58.1214874552 110% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.4 10.1575268817 83% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.15 10.9000537634 93% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.31 8.01818996416 91% => OK
difficult_words: 68.0 86.8835125448 78% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 7.0 10.002688172 70% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.4 10.0537634409 84% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 10.247311828 78% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200

Rates: 65.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 19.5 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.