A university has money in its budget to do one thing to improve its facilities for students. It can either improve the quality of the technology (for example: computers and printers) that it provides for students. Or it can redesign spaces where students hold club meetings and gather with friends in their spare time to make these areas more comfortable and appealing. Which idea do you prefer and why?
Nowadays, managing university budget has become a prominent issue in all governments. Due to its paramount importance and direct and indirect impact on students satisfaction headway, efforts for its improvement have always been among the top priorities of educational systems. A controversial question regarding this issue is whether spending budget on improve the quality of the technology is more important than redesign club meeting. Some people are inclined toward the opinion that improve the quality of the technology are the most important factors contributing to enhance facilities for students. while others believe that university should spend their budget on redesign spaces where students hold club meetings and gather with friends in their spare time. I, despite the general consensus, contend that both have their own merits and demerits. In what follows, I will aptly substantiate my viewpoint.
The first exquisite point to be mentioned is that without technology facilities such as computer, printer and so on, students will confront with a lot of problem. To elucidate, take a personal experience as an example; back in university of Yazd, when I was students there, the printers on electronic engineering department were always destroyed. had we a copy of our assignment, we would have gone other departments. It took a lot of time and cause to we attended class with delay. Such problems were aggravated during final exams.
Nonetheless, no one could neglect the fact that constructing meeting rooms creates the opportunities that not only could students rest after a busy day but also they could boost their pesonal skills such as making new friends. One of the main goals of educations is to train people for their future life. A student who bonds well with other student, has a self-confidence will be successful on his future life. Meeting rooms provide occasions that students could improve these abilities. Take my own experience, I always had problem in socialization with other people, these meeting rooms help me to overcome these negative habits.
Another equally significant point to be mentioned is that Building such a great area in university assists students to meet different character of people. In this situation, they have chance to associate with them for acquiring extra information. For example, one day I and my friends had talked about my research paper, one of the PHD students heard our speech and invited me to contributed whit him in this field. There was really a remarkable experience.
In brief, contemplating all the aforementioned reasons, one soon realizes that either improving the quality of the technology or constructing meeting room are essential to enhance facilities for students. Consequently, I highly suggest that authorities put more emphasis on better budget management in order to achieve better university facilities.
- TPO 30 Integrated Writing Task 75
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 153, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'students'' or 'student's'?
Suggestion: students'; student's
...tance and direct and indirect impact on students satisfaction headway, efforts for its i...
^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 605, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: While
...ing to enhance facilities for students. while others believe that university should s...
^^^^^
Line 1, column 781, Rule ID: GENERAL_XX[1]
Message: Use simply 'consensus'.
Suggestion: consensus
...nds in their spare time. I, despite the general consensus, contend that both have their own merit...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 146, Rule ID: A_LOT_OF_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun problem seems to be countable; consider using: 'a lot of problems'.
Suggestion: a lot of problems
... and so on, students will confront with a lot of problem. To elucidate, take a personal experien...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 348, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Had
...ering department were always destroyed. had we a copy of our assignment, we would h...
^^^
Line 15, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... achieve better university facilities.
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, consequently, first, if, nonetheless, really, regarding, so, well, while, for example, in brief, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 16.0 15.1003584229 106% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 9.8082437276 92% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 13.8261648746 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 11.0286738351 118% => OK
Pronoun: 45.0 43.0788530466 104% => OK
Preposition: 56.0 52.1666666667 107% => OK
Nominalization: 16.0 8.0752688172 198% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2458.0 1977.66487455 124% => OK
No of words: 454.0 407.700716846 111% => OK
Chars per words: 5.4140969163 4.8611393121 111% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.61598047577 4.48103885553 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.9664100494 2.67179642975 111% => OK
Unique words: 262.0 212.727598566 123% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.577092511013 0.524837075471 110% => OK
syllable_count: 758.7 618.680645161 123% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.51630824373 112% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 9.59856630824 73% => OK
Article: 4.0 3.08781362007 130% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.51792114695 57% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 20.6003584229 112% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 20.1344086022 94% => OK
Sentence length SD: 53.7437031965 48.9658058833 110% => OK
Chars per sentence: 106.869565217 100.406767564 106% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.7391304348 20.6045352989 96% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.0 5.45110844103 92% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 5.5376344086 108% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 15.0 11.8709677419 126% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 3.85842293907 130% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.303300072894 0.236089414692 128% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0739813733476 0.076458572812 97% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0761015119603 0.0737576698707 103% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.161546031356 0.150856017488 107% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0837177362039 0.0645574589148 130% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.9 11.7677419355 118% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 43.73 58.1214874552 75% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 10.1575268817 117% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.1 10.9000537634 129% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.93 8.01818996416 111% => OK
difficult_words: 125.0 86.8835125448 144% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 12.0 10.002688172 120% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 10.0537634409 95% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 90.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 27.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.