Young people nowadays do not give enough time to helping their communities
The world around us changes in unbelievable pace. No matter, how we use our time, we miss doing something. In this way, many claims todays we do not assign enough time to care and help others, while others disagree. From my prespective, Although everybody has unanimous consensus about the value of caring about each others, we do not try enough. In the following paragraphs, I express two conspecuous reasons to elaborate on my standpoint.
First and foremost, we live in the society which bombarding hearing about the importance of success. No medias and no teachers talk about the value of being kind and caring about the other people.In this community, not surprisingly, people prefer to consume their thime to get more money, and better position. In the better words, they put their efforts to reach the targets that media prepetuates. Take me an example, When I was going to high school, all of my teachers and my families push me toward to read more to be graduate whith maximum GPA. Scarecly did I remeber than I heard about the beneficial aspects of caring about the community and it can affect me to improve my personality as well as helping the other folks. Now, I think to myself,if I had been my parents, I should have teach my child the importance of the way he treats others. This example embodies theere is a clear relationship between environment effects and how the people affects from it in order to wheter care about their society or not.
In the second place, our government should show the beneficial aspects of helping our society. Goverments can use other country models to encourage people to be more involved in their communities. There are are many developed country that the importance of caring about others are wll stablished. Folks can understand it can affect their lives as well as their others if the government shows the exellent models. For instance, two years ago, I watched a movie about the japenease people; the film was talking about the culture of their native folks. Although, the main purpose of the film was not about the caring about each other, I was fascinated when I get familiar with the value of society in the japenease culture. All of them consider the other rights before themselves. My country might have changed to developed country if we had learned this behaviors.
In the final analysis, people our country do not assist each other, not only do we exaggerate the value of success, but also our government do not advertise the value of caring toward other people. If we want to be me in better wealth, we should learn from the good models and revise our characteristics about treating others.
- If people have the opportunity to get a secure job, they should take it right away rather than wait for a job that would be more satisfying 73
- 28 3
- One of the best ways that parents can help their teenage children prepare for adult life is to encourage them take a part time job 90
- Agree/Disagree:It's better for children choose jobs that are similar to their parent' jobs than to choose job that are very different from their parents' jobs. 73
- Imagine that you plan to donate money to charity to help people in need. If you could give money to only one type of charitable organization, which one of the following would you choose and why? 80
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 196, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: In
... kind and caring about the other people.In this community, not surprisingly, peopl...
^^
Line 2, column 749, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , if
... the other folks. Now, I think to myself,if I had been my parents, I should have te...
^^^
Line 2, column 790, Rule ID: HAVE_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Use past participle here: 'taught'.
Suggestion: taught
...if I had been my parents, I should have teach my child the importance of the way he t...
^^^^^
Line 2, column 967, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ts and how the people affects from it in order to wheter care about their society...
^^
Line 3, column 203, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a word
Suggestion: are
...re involved in their communities. There are are many developed country that the importa...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 542, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...alking about the culture of their native folks. Although, the main purpose of the...
^^
Line 3, column 848, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'these'?
Suggestion: these
... to developed country if we had learned this behaviors. In the final analysis, peop...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, if, second, so, well, while, for instance, i think, talking about, as well as, in the second place
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 13.0 15.1003584229 86% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 9.8082437276 82% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 13.8261648746 80% => OK
Relative clauses : 5.0 11.0286738351 45% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 59.0 43.0788530466 137% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 65.0 52.1666666667 125% => OK
Nominalization: 9.0 8.0752688172 111% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2197.0 1977.66487455 111% => OK
No of words: 457.0 407.700716846 112% => OK
Chars per words: 4.80743982495 4.8611393121 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.62358717085 4.48103885553 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.61483112486 2.67179642975 98% => OK
Unique words: 232.0 212.727598566 109% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.507658643326 0.524837075471 97% => OK
syllable_count: 686.7 618.680645161 111% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 13.0 9.59856630824 135% => OK
Article: 3.0 3.08781362007 97% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.94265232975 142% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 20.6003584229 107% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 20.1344086022 99% => OK
Sentence length SD: 43.3502933541 48.9658058833 89% => OK
Chars per sentence: 99.8636363636 100.406767564 99% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.7727272727 20.6045352989 101% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.27272727273 5.45110844103 97% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 7.0 5.5376344086 126% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 16.0 11.8709677419 135% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.88709677419 102% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.149565362599 0.236089414692 63% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0460803530707 0.076458572812 60% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0509921759583 0.0737576698707 69% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.102112083447 0.150856017488 68% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0335015580743 0.0645574589148 52% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.6 11.7677419355 99% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 59.64 58.1214874552 103% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 10.1575268817 97% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.62 10.9000537634 97% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.05 8.01818996416 100% => OK
difficult_words: 99.0 86.8835125448 114% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 6.5 10.002688172 65% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 10.0537634409 99% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 10.247311828 98% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.