TPO 19 Integrated essay
In this set of materials the article posits that our society is being harmed with negative effects of buzzers- someone who advertise personally to people. In this regard it provide three reasons of support which they have bad aspect on the community. However, the lecturer who is a buzzer himself, raises questions on the ideas and presents some evidence to refute them all.
First, the author of the reading passage states that buzzers are being paid, so they wouldn't tell the truth about products to people. In the contrast, the speaker cast doubt on this point by saying that companies investigate and they prefer to hire the people who are using their products for advertising. The buzzer indicates that he loved his cell phone and always tell the truth about this mobile, and that is why this company hired him.
The next explanation which is uttered in the article is that people will believe buzzers without any judgment. On contrary, the lecturer explains that people always ask him many questions about these phones. Therefore, if he don't have convincing answers for them, these customers wouldn't like to buy any cell-phone.
Finally, the author of the article asserts that buzzing has terrible consequences on the social relationships. Conversely, the speaker claims that the opposite is likely to be true. According to the lecturer, the buzzers tell people that they will have a good experience with having this phones and they would like it. Hence, this act can help them to build a superior relationship.
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In this regard it provide three reasons of support which they have bad aspect on the community.
Description: 'they' refers to what? Be sensitive to use pronouns.
if he don't have convincing answers
if he doesn't have convincing answers
Sentence: According to the lecturer, the buzzers tell people that they will have a good experience with having this phones and they would like it.
Description: A determiner/pronoun, singular is not usually followed by a noun, plural, common
Suggestion: Refer to this and phones
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 22 in 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 13 12
No. of Words: 256 250
No. of Characters: 1235 1200
No. of Different Words: 145 150
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4 4.2
Average Word Length: 4.824 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.41 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 93 80
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 63 60
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 36 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 21 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 19.692 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.283 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.462 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.331 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.568 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.103 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 4