Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?In the past, young people depended too much on their parents to make decisions for them; today young people are better able to make decisions about their own lives.Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Because of the improvement of the Internet and technology, human's life and working style have changed mostly in contrast to the past. As a result, I strongly agree with the statement that young people in the present are better able to make decisions to make decisions about their lives than in the past. There are two reasons I will explore in the following essays.
First of all, the Internet helps young people access valuable knowledge which was hard to be reached in the past. On the Internet, young people can conveniently learn new expertise and acquire higher education certificates with low costs. For example, the massive open course platforms, which integrate many courses and programs from different international universities, offer the opportunities for people to achieve academic programs from top universities such as UC Berkeley and Stanford. Therefore, nowadays young people over the world can use the resources to cultivate their career skills and change their lives by themselves.
Secondly, nowadays young people can receive much more resources over the world. Since the improvement of technology builds an open environment, people in the present can rapidly access and share ideas and information on the Internet. It means that chances and resources in the world can be distributed far and evenly on earth. To take my brother as an example, he was a sales in my country, which are small and compete in a private market. Through searching on the Internet, my brother found the chances to cooperate with a European country in a project. After the collaboration for one year, my brother successfully obtains the offer from the company and works abroad. If he was in the past, it was impossible to contact a foreign company in Taiwan on his own. The example illustrates how young people can make decisions on their own lives by obtaining more resources and information in the present.
In conclusion, I believe young people are better able to make decisions about their lives. Because of the development of technology and the Internet, young people can access valuable knowledge and search out resources much more easily in the present world.
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2020-01-29 | nusybah | 80 | view |
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- TPO43 Integrated Writing 85
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 14, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... in the following essays. First of all, the Internet helps young people access v...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, if, second, secondly, so, therefore, for example, in conclusion, in contrast, such as, as a result, first of all, in contrast to
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 10.0 15.1003584229 66% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 9.8082437276 82% => OK
Conjunction : 15.0 13.8261648746 108% => OK
Relative clauses : 5.0 11.0286738351 45% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 20.0 43.0788530466 46% => OK
Preposition: 57.0 52.1666666667 109% => OK
Nominalization: 9.0 8.0752688172 111% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1809.0 1977.66487455 91% => OK
No of words: 354.0 407.700716846 87% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.11016949153 4.8611393121 105% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.33761313653 4.48103885553 97% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.77698558719 2.67179642975 104% => OK
Unique words: 175.0 212.727598566 82% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.494350282486 0.524837075471 94% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 566.1 618.680645161 92% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 9.59856630824 73% => OK
Article: 3.0 3.08781362007 97% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 3.51792114695 171% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 8.0 4.94265232975 162% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 20.6003584229 83% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 20.0 20.1344086022 99% => OK
Sentence length SD: 42.776396169 48.9658058833 87% => OK
Chars per sentence: 106.411764706 100.406767564 106% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.8235294118 20.6045352989 101% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.23529411765 5.45110844103 151% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.5376344086 18% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 11.8709677419 84% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.88709677419 123% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.363075923847 0.236089414692 154% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.128310645307 0.076458572812 168% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.15312146879 0.0737576698707 208% => The coherence between sentences is low.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.271328485921 0.150856017488 180% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0965670845256 0.0645574589148 150% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.0 11.7677419355 110% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 51.18 58.1214874552 88% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 10.1575268817 109% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.36 10.9000537634 113% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.2 8.01818996416 102% => OK
difficult_words: 80.0 86.8835125448 92% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 10.0537634409 99% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 10.247311828 127% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.