Importance of Information 2
We humans live in a complex world that everything within it is connected to each other. the butterfly effect theory explains this connectivity by stating that tiny things as flip of a butterfly wing can cause a typhoon over some other part of the world. So, this premise that there are things and events that are unrelated to us because they don't affect our lives is a false one. In my opinion, it is so important to know about events around the world, even if it is unlikely that they will affect our daily lives for two reasons.
First and foremost, we must try to broaden our horizons as much as possible. If you ask what is the fundamental factor that helped humans to survive throughout history despite all the threats and problems, the answer is their ability to gain and store knowledge about variety of thing. For example, humans start to make signals for their communication, so they stored, passed and progressed this process until they reached the level of being able to communicate verbally. After that they devised writing and the next step was the invention of printing. However, this trend didn't stop and now we have internet as a mean of communication. so, by inventing and progressing the communicational means we can store and transmit information, experience and skills to each other and to the new generations. We all know that humans' existence is threatened in variety of ways like environmental factors like scarcity of water, global warming, soil pollution or human interventions like atomic bombs. So, this delicate balance can be disturbed easily, that is why we have to gather as much as information that we can to be prepared and act in advance to prevent disasters from happening. That is why I'm positive that it's important to know about events happening around the world in spite of the fact that they seem trivial.
Second, we aren't able to tell beforehand what information is crucial and what is not. In other words, we tend to know the importance of matters by hindsight that means after things happen. For instance, in the case of the Iranian revolution in 1970, people were obsessed to fire out the king of Iran and put an end to the monarchic regime. Their mistake was that they didn't pay attention to an alternative appropriate way of governance that provide liberty and justice for them. So, after the revolution the Islamic party gained the power and new dictatorship arose. If people was sensitive to the events and were more informed about the downfalls of totalitarian religious powers things wouldn't reach to another dictatorship. For instance, if the people were knowledgeable about history of the west and the oppression of the church they would have been more cautious. As a result, we should not underestimate any happening around the world.
In conclusion, due to the essentiality of gaining knowledge and the fact that we learn the importance of matters through hindsight, I advocate the statement that we should pay attention to events happening around the world. Finally, I suggest that news agencies all over the world should facilitate flow of information about occurrences around the world as much ad they could.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 89, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: The
...g within it is connected to each other. the butterfly effect theory explains this c...
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Line 1, column 343, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
...s that are unrelated to us because they dont affect our lives is a false one. In my ...
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Line 1, column 453, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...t to know about events around the world, even if it is unlikely that they will af...
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Line 3, column 574, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: didn't
...ention of printing. However, this trend didnt stop and now we have internet as a mean...
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Line 3, column 638, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: So
...ve internet as a mean of communication. so, by inventing and progressing the commu...
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Line 3, column 817, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'humans'' or 'human's'?
Suggestion: humans'; human's
...o the new generations. We all know that humans existence is threatened in variety of w...
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Line 3, column 1190, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
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Suggestion: I'm
...t disasters from happening. That is why Im positive that its important to know abo...
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Line 5, column 12, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
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Suggestion: aren't
...t that they seem trivial. Second, we arent able to tell beforehand what informatio...
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Line 5, column 369, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
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Suggestion: didn't
...hic regime. Their mistake was that they didnt pay attention to an alternative appropr...
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Suggestion: wouldn't
...of totalitarian religious powers things wouldnt reach to another dictatorship. For inst...
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Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, finally, first, however, if, second, so, for example, for instance, in conclusion, as a result, in my opinion, in other words, in spite of
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 23.0 15.1003584229 152% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 9.8082437276 112% => OK
Conjunction : 20.0 13.8261648746 145% => OK
Relative clauses : 19.0 11.0286738351 172% => OK
Pronoun: 61.0 43.0788530466 142% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 79.0 52.1666666667 151% => OK
Nominalization: 22.0 8.0752688172 272% => Less nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2638.0 1977.66487455 133% => OK
No of words: 537.0 407.700716846 132% => OK
Chars per words: 4.91247672253 4.8611393121 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.81386128306 4.48103885553 107% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.75657929429 2.67179642975 103% => OK
Unique words: 271.0 212.727598566 127% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.504655493482 0.524837075471 96% => OK
syllable_count: 819.9 618.680645161 133% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 15.0 9.59856630824 156% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 7.0 3.51792114695 199% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.94265232975 142% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 20.6003584229 112% => OK
Sentence length: 23.0 20.1344086022 114% => OK
Sentence length SD: 44.5194887339 48.9658058833 91% => OK
Chars per sentence: 114.695652174 100.406767564 114% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.347826087 20.6045352989 113% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.21739130435 5.45110844103 114% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 10.0 5.5376344086 181% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 11.8709677419 93% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.85842293907 104% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 8.0 4.88709677419 164% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.124854842777 0.236089414692 53% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0343488851836 0.076458572812 45% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0478046770064 0.0737576698707 65% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0906269555798 0.150856017488 60% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0402563873217 0.0645574589148 62% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.4 11.7677419355 114% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 56.59 58.1214874552 97% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 10.1575268817 109% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.49 10.9000537634 105% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.54 8.01818996416 107% => OK
difficult_words: 128.0 86.8835125448 147% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.5 10.002688172 135% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 10.0537634409 111% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.