Q7. Schools should teach children some academic subjects which will be beneficial to their future careers. Therefore, other subjects such as music and sports are not important. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
Recently, the issue of young people's education has become the subject of heated debate. Some people assert that more emphasis should be placed on core subjects, such as science and mathematics, than other subjects, including art and music as they are directly related to youngsters' future careers, while others argue otherwise. Personally, I believe that both arguments should be given equal weight. In the following essay, the evidence supporting this contention will be discussed alongside relevant examples.
On the one hand, it seems difficult to refute the idea that studying academic subjects should be a priority. Perhaps the most compelling reason is that having a tight grasp of science and mathematics allows people to land well-paying and prestigious occupations with greater ease given that in this technologically advanced era, there are a multitude of employment opportunities in the field of science and technology. Furthermore, science and technology graduates play a vital role in solving serious contemporary issues of humans, including environmental problems. As an illustration, Tesla which is the most notable firm in the field of the automobile industry could release electric cars because employees who majored in science and technology developed the way up-to-date technology, exerting a positive influence on human beings since electric vehicles do not generate carbon dioxide.
On the other hand, it seems short-sighted to contend that teaching core subjects should precedence over other subjects. The most oft-cited argument against such a view is that there are a number of advantages that can be derived from receiving art education and physical education. To be more specific, primary school students and secondary schools are capable of developing self-expression as well as creativity by attending art classes. In addition, participating in physical activities makes it possible for young individuals to acquire social skills by mingling with their peers. Moreover, to provide a hypothetical example, if it were not for physical education classes, a large number of pupils would be more likely to have difficulty alleviating stress, which can even have a negative impact on their academic performance. In light of the above, I also find these persuasive.
In conclusion, it is undeniable that there are a variety of opinions about this topic. However, after considering this matter in a careful manner, it can be concluded that each side of the debate has its strengths, as discussed above.
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Comments
Essay evaluations by e-grader
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 678, Rule ID: LARGE_NUMBER_OF[1]
Message: Specify a number, remove phrase, or simply use 'many' or 'numerous'
Suggestion: many; numerous
...ere not for physical education classes, a large number of pupils would be more likely to have dif...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 127, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
Message: Consider replacing "in a careful manner" with adverb for "careful"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
... However, after considering this matter in a careful manner, it can be concluded that each side of ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, furthermore, however, if, moreover, second, so, well, while, in addition, in conclusion, such as, as well as, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 18.0 13.1623246493 137% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 7.85571142285 127% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 10.4138276553 86% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 7.30460921844 178% => OK
Pronoun: 27.0 24.0651302605 112% => OK
Preposition: 53.0 41.998997996 126% => OK
Nominalization: 18.0 8.3376753507 216% => Less nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2143.0 1615.20841683 133% => OK
No of words: 389.0 315.596192385 123% => OK
Chars per words: 5.50899742931 5.12529762239 107% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.44106776838 4.20363070211 106% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.03834291672 2.80592935109 108% => OK
Unique words: 238.0 176.041082164 135% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.611825192802 0.561755894193 109% => OK
syllable_count: 683.1 506.74238477 135% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.8 1.60771543086 112% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 5.43587174349 110% => OK
Article: 4.0 2.52805611222 158% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 2.10420841683 285% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 0.809619238477 0% => OK
Preposition: 9.0 4.76152304609 189% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 16.0 16.0721442886 100% => OK
Sentence length: 24.0 20.2975951904 118% => OK
Sentence length SD: 79.0276850224 49.4020404114 160% => OK
Chars per sentence: 133.9375 106.682146367 126% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.3125 20.7667163134 117% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.3125 7.06120827912 118% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.01903807615 40% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 8.67935871743 104% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.9879759519 75% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 3.4128256513 117% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.23455409631 0.244688304435 96% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0669714118829 0.084324248473 79% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0451557230244 0.0667982634062 68% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.126626212436 0.151304729494 84% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0463308514011 0.056905535591 81% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 16.7 13.0946893788 128% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 30.2 50.2224549098 60% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.44779559118 150% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 15.0 11.3001002004 133% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.97 12.4159519038 121% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 10.23 8.58950901804 119% => OK
difficult_words: 133.0 78.4519038076 170% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 9.78957915832 82% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 10.1190380762 115% => OK
text_standard: 15.0 10.7795591182 139% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 89.8876404494 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 8.0 Out of 9
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 678, Rule ID: LARGE_NUMBER_OF[1]
Message: Specify a number, remove phrase, or simply use 'many' or 'numerous'
Suggestion: many; numerous
...ere not for physical education classes, a large number of pupils would be more likely to have dif...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 127, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
Message: Consider replacing "in a careful manner" with adverb for "careful"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
... However, after considering this matter in a careful manner, it can be concluded that each side of ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, furthermore, however, if, moreover, second, so, well, while, in addition, in conclusion, such as, as well as, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 18.0 13.1623246493 137% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 7.85571142285 127% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 10.4138276553 86% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 7.30460921844 178% => OK
Pronoun: 27.0 24.0651302605 112% => OK
Preposition: 53.0 41.998997996 126% => OK
Nominalization: 18.0 8.3376753507 216% => Less nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2143.0 1615.20841683 133% => OK
No of words: 389.0 315.596192385 123% => OK
Chars per words: 5.50899742931 5.12529762239 107% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.44106776838 4.20363070211 106% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.03834291672 2.80592935109 108% => OK
Unique words: 238.0 176.041082164 135% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.611825192802 0.561755894193 109% => OK
syllable_count: 683.1 506.74238477 135% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.8 1.60771543086 112% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 5.43587174349 110% => OK
Article: 4.0 2.52805611222 158% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 2.10420841683 285% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 0.809619238477 0% => OK
Preposition: 9.0 4.76152304609 189% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 16.0 16.0721442886 100% => OK
Sentence length: 24.0 20.2975951904 118% => OK
Sentence length SD: 79.0276850224 49.4020404114 160% => OK
Chars per sentence: 133.9375 106.682146367 126% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.3125 20.7667163134 117% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.3125 7.06120827912 118% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.01903807615 40% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 8.67935871743 104% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.9879759519 75% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 3.4128256513 117% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.23455409631 0.244688304435 96% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0669714118829 0.084324248473 79% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0451557230244 0.0667982634062 68% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.126626212436 0.151304729494 84% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0463308514011 0.056905535591 81% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 16.7 13.0946893788 128% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 30.2 50.2224549098 60% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.44779559118 150% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 15.0 11.3001002004 133% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.97 12.4159519038 121% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 10.23 8.58950901804 119% => OK
difficult_words: 133.0 78.4519038076 170% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 9.78957915832 82% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 10.1190380762 115% => OK
text_standard: 15.0 10.7795591182 139% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 89.8876404494 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 8.0 Out of 9
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.