Due to the development and rapid expansion of supermarkets in some countries, many small, local businesses are unable to compete. Some people think that the closure of local business bring about the death of local communities.To what extent do you agree o

Essay topics:

Due to the development and rapid expansion of supermarkets in some countries, many small, local businesses are unable to compete. Some people think that the closure of local business bring about the death of local communities.

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In Kazakhstan, there is an issue in society about what type of impact the closure of regional businesses due to the widespread of shopping malls have on the regional community. Some sociologists believe that the impact would lead to the destruction of local communities. This essay disagrees with this point of view for the following reasons.

The first reason is the loose bond between the closure of regional business and local groups of people. Apart from local companies, there are many other aspects of society that unit people in groups, including local traditions, customs, language and history. These components of society can withstand even if local business is completely shut down. For example, Karaganda city not only has survived but also has thrived since multinational companies entered and swallowed almost all small companies in the region in 2002.

Another reason why communities can survive once local business is annihilated by supermarkets is that the entry of large companies attracts more investment into the region. Local communities would benefit from the appearance malls in their areas since their introduction in the region arouse interest in other participants of the global market and could entice them to invest money as well. As a result, this would bring a positive effect, since local communities would have access to more job places and better services.

However, some sociologists guess that local societies would disappear along with local businesses. The main reason is that the end of local companies would result in a rise in unemployment. The unemployment would force many people to find jobs in other regions, and gradually people would relocate from the region, leaving only a small number of people working in these malls. Despite this, supermarkets would be able to employ all jobless people in the region. To maintain large premises and deliver products means the involvement of many workers, who can be found amongst locals if the local authorities oblige the owners to do that.

In conclusion, after analyzing, it is clear that it is pointless to worry about the future of local communities once supermarkets take control of the local market, since the region would attract more investors, and local people would be secured with jobs.

Votes
Average: 7.3 (1 vote)
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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
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...nt of view for the following reasons. The first reason is the loose bond betwe...
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Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
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...mall companies in the region in 2002. Another reason why communities can survi...
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Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
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... more job places and better services. However, some sociologists guess that lo...
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Message: Specify a number, remove phrase, use 'a few', or use 'some'
Suggestion: a few; some
... relocate from the region, leaving only a small number of people working in these malls. Despite ...
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...horities oblige the owners to do that. In conclusion, after analyzing, it is cl...
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Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, however, if, so, well, apart from, for example, in conclusion, as a result

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 13.1623246493 91% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 15.0 7.85571142285 191% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 10.4138276553 86% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 7.30460921844 110% => OK
Pronoun: 18.0 24.0651302605 75% => OK
Preposition: 58.0 41.998997996 138% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 8.3376753507 84% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1928.0 1615.20841683 119% => OK
No of words: 367.0 315.596192385 116% => OK
Chars per words: 5.25340599455 5.12529762239 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.37689890912 4.20363070211 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.70676047697 2.80592935109 96% => OK
Unique words: 197.0 176.041082164 112% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.536784741144 0.561755894193 96% => OK
syllable_count: 601.2 506.74238477 119% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.60771543086 100% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 5.43587174349 74% => OK
Article: 3.0 2.52805611222 119% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.10420841683 190% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 0.809619238477 247% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 8.0 4.76152304609 168% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 16.0 16.0721442886 100% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 20.2975951904 108% => OK
Sentence length SD: 52.6224390707 49.4020404114 107% => OK
Chars per sentence: 120.5 106.682146367 113% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.9375 20.7667163134 110% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.75 7.06120827912 81% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.38176352705 114% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 5.01903807615 100% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 4.0 8.67935871743 46% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 3.9879759519 176% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 3.4128256513 147% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.308296653531 0.244688304435 126% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.114637113895 0.084324248473 136% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0623360265292 0.0667982634062 93% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.187976732939 0.151304729494 124% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0356386135041 0.056905535591 63% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.8 13.0946893788 113% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 49.15 50.2224549098 98% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.44779559118 118% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 11.3001002004 105% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.47 12.4159519038 108% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.9 8.58950901804 104% => OK
difficult_words: 97.0 78.4519038076 124% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 9.78957915832 82% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 10.1190380762 107% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.7795591182 83% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 73.0337078652 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 6.5 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.