There are many different types of music in the world today. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important than the international music that I heard everywhere nowadays?
Music is experiencing a rapid growth of type expansion in nowadays. This has affected to the people’s need of this art sound for some reasons. Then, as a result of that growth, international music which has dominated the traditional one is believed has more importance than that one.
Every human needs a relaxation device, then music is highly believed as the best instrument. Taking Ipad then turning on a music can release my stress after dealing with my job in office. It is because music can repair some stressed neuron in human’s brain. Thus, it becomes a reason why music is included in people needs.
Music is also has an importance in the effort of increasing a success of a business. Many shopping centers provide slow music for its buyer in order to make them walk slowly then get bigger desire to pick out more goods. The bigger number things are sold, the higher amount of income that company can receive. So, it is clearly that music is very helpful in human life, especially in economy sector.
In the comparison of the importance between traditional and modern music, I personally believe that the modern one seems more valuable than the traditional when this is used as teaching media. Its ability to attract students to do some task faster is highly guaranteed can increase the learners’ study output. So, international music can be more essential.
The booming of international music fans is highly effective in sharing information about one nation’s culture. Music Hip Hop has been successful in introducing western culture to the all people in this world. It is because this music is watched internationally and enjoyed well by its listeners. That is why supporting the existence of international music is more important than keeping go with the traditional one.
In summary, human’s need of music is mainly based for refreshing and economic purpose. Then, international music is valued more important than the traditional as it can be used as a good teaching media and can introduce a country’s culture in international level. From analyzing this studies, it is assumed that music will experience a greater development in the future.
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is believed has more importance than that one.
is believed to have more importance than that one.
Music is also has an importance
Music also has an importance
Its ability to attract students to do some task faster is highly guaranteed can increase the learners’ study output
Its ability to attract students to do some task faster is highly guaranteed, which can increase the learners’ study output
Sentence: Thus, it becomes a reason why music is included in people needs.
Description: A noun, plural, common is not usually followed by a noun, plural, common
Suggestion: Refer to people and needs
Sentence: So, it is clearly that music is very helpful in human life, especially in economy sector.
Description: The fragment is clearly that is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace clearly with adjective
Sentence: Music Hip Hop has been successful in introducing western culture to the all people in this world.
Description: The token the is not usually followed by a determiner/pronoun, pre-quantifier
Suggestion: Refer to the and all
Sentence: That is why supporting the existence of international music is more important than keeping go with the traditional one.
Description: A verb, present participle or gerund is not usually followed by a verb, base: uninflected present, imperative or infinitive
Suggestion: Refer to keeping and go
Sentence: From analyzing this studies, it is assumed that music will experience a greater development in the future.
Description: A determiner/pronoun, singular is not usually followed by a noun, plural, common
Suggestion: Refer to this and studies
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 8 2
Read a good grammar book.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.5 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 8 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 21 15
No. of Words: 360 350
No. of Characters: 1757 1500
No. of Different Words: 192 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.356 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.881 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.768 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 126 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 93 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 58 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 41 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 17.143 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.659 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.524 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.342 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.567 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.076 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 6 5