The following appeared in a memo from the director of student housing at Buckingham College.
"To serve the housing needs of our students, Buckingham College should build a number of new dormitories. Buckingham's enrollment is growing and, based on current trends, will double over the next 50 years, thus making existing dormitory space inadequate. Moreover, the average rent for an apartment in our town has risen in recent years. Consequently, students will find it increasingly difficult to afford off-campus housing. Finally, attractive new dormitories would make prospective students more likely to enroll at Buckingham."
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
While the director of student housing provides a number of cogent arguments for why additional on-campus housing is necessary for students at Buckingham College in the coming future, more evidence needs to be collected in order to evaluate the recommendation and determine its efficacy.
The author begins his letter with the assertion that increased housing must be built to account for the doubling in student population that Buckingham will observe over the next 50 years. While this statement is sensible on the surface, more evidence must be provided to determine if housing in the coming years will be as scanty as the speaker presumes. First, it would be useful to know the percentage of Buckingham’s students that reside in the dorms each year. If studies showed that, while the number of students attending Buckingham college had indeed increased in past years, the percentage of students utilizing on-campus housing remained relatively the same, this would infer that the population increase was mainly due to students who lived off campus. This finding would enervate the authors claim that additional housing is necessary at Buckingham College. Moreover, supporting information detailing the growth rate of students at Buckingham would be necessary to corroborate the authors argument. If this information were obtained and revealed a similar rate of student population growth over the 50 years prior to this letter, and it were discovered that no additional dorms were developed during this time, the speaker’s assertion that on-campus housing in the coming years would be proven inadequate and feeble.
Additionally, subsequent information would need to be obtained providing details of the housing statistics of students both on and off-campus. Since the author claims that an increase in the average price of an apartment near campus would affect the ability of the students to find off-campus housing, it would be necessary to know the percentage of students at Buckingham College that utilize on campus housing versus those that rent apartments versus other housing options, such as houses or condos. It would also be helpful to understand the cause of the increased apartment rent. If the majority of students actually live on campus, off-campus apartment pricing would not affect most of Buckingham’s students. Furthermore, if statistics revealed that the overwhelming majority of off-campus students reside in houses, rather than apartments, or that the number of students choosing to live in homes rather than apartments has increased from previous years, the author’s statement that increased apartment pricing justifies the development of additional on-campus dorms is nugatory. Lastly, if studies showed that the increase in average apartment rent was a result of inflation, and that the average salary for students at and surrounding Buckingham College increased commensurately, the speaker’s assertion that increased apartment pricing results in increased difficulty for students to find off-campus housing would be cursory and unwarranted.
Finally, the author of the provided letter claims that novel dorms on campus would result in an increase in enrollment at Buckingham College. For this statement to be evaluated, historical records of development at Buckingham in previous years would need to be provided; this information would help to determine if there is any truth to the speaker’s statement. If in past years, additional housing was built on campus and there was in fact a subsequent rise in enrollment at the University, this information would bolster the author’s claim (provided that no additional changes were made to Buckingham College that year, of course).
Overall, although the director of student housing at Buckingham College offered several supporting arguments for the installment of additional on-campus housing for students, more evidence would need to be obtained to evaluate the efficacy of the claim that current dorm housing is inadequate and that additional housing would result in increased student enrollment at Buckingham College.
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Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 5.0 out of 6
Category: Very Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 18 15
No. of Words: 627 350
No. of Characters: 3414 1500
No. of Different Words: 216 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 5.004 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.445 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.851 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 286 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 235 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 173 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 117 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 34.833 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 15.17 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.778 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.431 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.597 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.164 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 993, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...m would be necessary to corroborate the authors argument. If this information were obta...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, also, finally, first, furthermore, if, lastly, moreover, so, while, in fact, of course, such as, as a result
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 28.0 19.6327345309 143% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 24.0 12.9520958084 185% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 11.1786427146 107% => OK
Relative clauses : 23.0 13.6137724551 169% => OK
Pronoun: 38.0 28.8173652695 132% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 101.0 55.5748502994 182% => OK
Nominalization: 33.0 16.3942115768 201% => Less nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 3492.0 2260.96107784 154% => OK
No of words: 627.0 441.139720559 142% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.56937799043 5.12650576532 109% => OK
Fourth root words length: 5.00399520894 4.56307096286 110% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.94438424706 2.78398813304 106% => OK
Unique words: 227.0 204.123752495 111% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.362041467305 0.468620217663 77% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 1066.5 705.55239521 151% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 4.96107784431 141% => OK
Article: 6.0 8.76447105788 68% => OK
Subordination: 11.0 2.70958083832 406% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 3.0 1.67365269461 179% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 19.7664670659 91% => OK
Sentence length: 34.0 22.8473053892 149% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 102.447411984 57.8364921388 177% => OK
Chars per sentence: 194.0 119.503703932 162% => OK
Words per sentence: 34.8333333333 23.324526521 149% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.55555555556 5.70786347227 115% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.25449101796 19% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 8.20758483034 122% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.67664670659 86% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.301507624044 0.218282227539 138% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.139473997082 0.0743258471296 188% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0849712060151 0.0701772020484 121% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.247388861207 0.128457276422 193% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0697856900369 0.0628817314937 111% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 22.2 14.3799401198 154% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 28.51 48.3550499002 59% => Flesch_reading_ease is low.
smog_index: 11.2 7.1628742515 156% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 17.7 12.197005988 145% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 15.62 12.5979740519 124% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.55 8.32208582834 103% => OK
difficult_words: 128.0 98.500998004 130% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 18.5 12.3882235529 149% => OK
gunning_fog: 15.6 11.1389221557 140% => OK
text_standard: 16.0 11.9071856287 134% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Write the essay in 30 minutes.
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.