The diagrams below show the changes that have taken place at West Park Secondary School since its construction in 1950

Essay topics:

The diagrams below show the changes that have taken place at West Park Secondary School since its construction in 1950.

The maps display the modifications that have taken place at West Park Secondary School since its construction in 1950. In common, it can be seen that a school building and the main road have not changed throughout years. And the playground has hardly changed.
To begin , 3 blocks of houses which was located in west of the school, were removed in 1980. And instead of them were built car park and science block. Farmland, which was located in south of the houses was developed into a sports field for children in 1980.
However, in 2010, the school's main building and the science block were still intact. But the car park was increased in size and whole area of the sports field was taken up by car park. Subsequently, the large area of the playground, which was situated in south of the school's main building, replaced by a sports field.
In brief, the area around West Park Secondary School has changed and optimised for schools' various needs , for 60 years. In addition to a new science block, a large car park has been constructed and extended. Hence , the spot for the sports field and playground reduced.

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IELTS Writing Task I - IELTS Academic

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 150, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... in 1950. In common, it can be seen that a school building and the main road hav...
^^
Line 1, column 169, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
..., it can be seen that a school building and the main road have not changed throu...
^^
Line 2, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...And the playground has hardly changed. To begin , 3 blocks of houses which was...
^^
Line 2, column 11, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...ayground has hardly changed. To begin , 3 blocks of houses which was located i...
^^
Line 2, column 25, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ardly changed. To begin , 3 blocks of houses which was located in west of the ...
^^
Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... a sports field for children in 1980. However, in 2010, the schools main build...
^^
Line 3, column 91, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...the science block were still intact. But the car park was increased in size and ...
^^
Line 3, column 96, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...cience block were still intact. But the car park was increased in size and whole...
^^
Line 3, column 247, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... large area of the playground, which was situated in south of the schools main ...
^^
Line 3, column 266, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...playground, which was situated in south of the schools main building, replaced ...
^^
Line 3, column 282, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...h was situated in south of the schools main building, replaced by a sports fiel...
^^
Line 4, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...building, replaced by a sports field. In brief, the area around West Park Seco...
^^
Line 4, column 67, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...d West Park Secondary School has changed and optimised for schools various needs ...
^^
Line 4, column 108, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
... and optimised for schools various needs , for 60 years. In addition to a new scie...
^^
Line 4, column 218, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...has been constructed and extended. Hence , the spot for the sports field and playg...
^^
Line 4, column 238, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'sports'' or 'sport's'?
Suggestion: sports'; sport's
... and extended. Hence , the spot for the sports field and playground reduced.
^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, hence, however, if, second, so, still, in addition, in brief

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 11.0 7.0 157% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 1.0 1.00243902439 100% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 6.8 147% => OK
Relative clauses : 5.0 3.15609756098 158% => OK
Pronoun: 5.0 5.60731707317 89% => OK
Preposition: 27.0 33.7804878049 80% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 3.97073170732 126% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 917.0 965.302439024 95% => OK
No of words: 195.0 196.424390244 99% => OK
Chars per words: 4.70256410256 4.92477711251 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 3.73687570622 3.73543355544 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.45307454784 2.65546596893 92% => OK
Unique words: 100.0 106.607317073 94% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.512820512821 0.547539520022 94% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 247.5 283.868780488 87% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.3 1.45097560976 90% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 1.0 1.53170731707 65% => OK
Article: 6.0 4.33902439024 138% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 1.07073170732 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 3.0 0.482926829268 621% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 5.0 3.36585365854 149% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 12.0 8.94146341463 134% => OK
Sentence length: 16.0 22.4926829268 71% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 27.3460336348 43.030603864 64% => OK
Chars per sentence: 76.4166666667 112.824112599 68% => OK
Words per sentence: 16.25 22.9334400587 71% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.41666666667 5.23603664747 103% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 3.83414634146 104% => OK
Language errors: 16.0 1.69756097561 943% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 2.0 3.70975609756 54% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 1.13902439024 351% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.09268292683 147% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.2911500253 0.215688989381 135% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.112598591934 0.103423049105 109% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.167683263451 0.0843802449381 199% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.206515162754 0.15604864568 132% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.172665889044 0.0819641961636 211% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 8.8 13.2329268293 67% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 80.62 61.2550243902 132% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.51609756098 48% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 6.0 10.3012195122 58% => Flesch kincaid grade is low.
coleman_liau_index: 9.68 11.4140731707 85% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 6.7 8.06136585366 83% => OK
difficult_words: 28.0 40.7170731707 69% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 6.5 11.4329268293 57% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 8.4 10.9970731707 76% => OK
text_standard: 7.0 11.0658536585 63% => The average readability is low. Need to imporve the language.
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 61.797752809 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 5.5 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.