According to a recent report by our marketing department, during the past year, fewer people attended Super Screen produced movies than in any other year. And yet the percentage of positive reviews by movie reviewers about specific Super Screen movies actually increased during the last year. Clearly, the content of these reviews is not reaching enough of our prospective viewers. Thus, the problem lies not in the quality of our movies but with public's lack of awareness that movies of good quality are available. Super Screen should therefore allocate a greater quantity of its budget next year to reaching the public through advertising.
The advertising director states that the problem of the fewer people attend to the Super Screen-produced movies is the lack of the awareness. Still, there are some questions among the memo which should be answer to make the memo more convincing.
The memo states that a recent report from the marketing department indicates the fewer people attended the movies. However, how does the report conduct? If the report only record the attendence during midnight, then the fewer people attended to movies are normal. For example, during the previous year, the attendence of a whole day is 100 people. The report which only record mifnight attendence indicates 100 people. That the number of the people attend to the movies whole day should surpass the past years. So the director should provide us the detail of the report.
Moreover, the author also said that the percentage of positive reviewers by movie reviewers increased during the past year. However, what is the base of the reviewers? If the base of the reviewers are 1000 people, and having 10 positive reviewers at the previous year, the percentage of positive reviewers is 1 precent. At past year, the total number of the reviewers is also 1000 people, but the positive reviewers is 20, the percentage of positive reviewers is 2 percent. The perentage seem to have increased, but there are still 98 percent of the reviewers are not happy with the movies. So the director should answer the question to proof that the percentage of the positive reviewers can be the percise indicators.
Last, the memo states that the piblic is lack of the awarness of the movies of good quality are available. However, how can the director be sure that the problem is because the awareness? If everyone knows that the Super Screen-produced movies have the good quality, but there are other fact that lead to the fewer attendence. For example, there is the global illness that strike the country. People are afraid to go outside or going to the place which will have lots of people. The fewer people to go see the movie are normal circumstance. Then having more budget on advertising is a waste of money and can not bring more profits.
To conclude, the director should answer the questions above to make the article more convincing.
Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
---|---|---|---|
2023-07-25 | rubelmonir | 16 | view |
2023-07-25 | rubelmonir | 60 | view |
2023-07-23 | Mizanur_Rahman | 50 | view |
2023-02-14 | tedyang777 | 60 | view |
2022-11-13 | barath002 | 58 | view |
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Comments
e-rater score report
Sentence: The advertising director states that the problem of the fewer people attend to the Super Screen-produced movies is the lack of the awareness.
Description: The fragment Super Screen-produced movies is not usually followed by is
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace is with are
Sentence: If the base of the reviewers are 1000 people, and having 10 positive reviewers at the previous year, the percentage of positive reviewers is 1 precent.
Description: The fragment 1 precent . is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace precent with adverb
Sentence: At past year, the total number of the reviewers is also 1000 people, but the positive reviewers is 20, the percentage of positive reviewers is 2 percent.
Description: The fragment the positive reviewers is not usually followed by is
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace is with are
Sentence: The perentage seem to have increased, but there are still 98 percent of the reviewers are not happy with the movies.
Description: The fragment perentage seem to is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace seem with verb, past tense
Description: The fragment still 98 percent is not usually preceded by are
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace are with is
Sentence: For example, there is the global illness that strike the country.
Description: The fragment that strike the is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace strike with verb, past tense
Sentence: The fewer people to go see the movie are normal circumstance.
Description: The fragment see the movie is not usually followed by are
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace are with is
Sentence: If the report only record the attendence during midnight, then the fewer people attended to movies are normal.
Error: attendence Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: For example, during the previous year, the attendence of a whole day is 100 people.
Error: attendence Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: The report which only record mifnight attendence indicates 100 people.
Error: attendence Suggestion: No alternate word
Error: mifnight Suggestion: midnight
Sentence: If the base of the reviewers are 1000 people, and having 10 positive reviewers at the previous year, the percentage of positive reviewers is 1 precent.
Error: precent Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: The perentage seem to have increased, but there are still 98 percent of the reviewers are not happy with the movies.
Error: perentage Suggestion: percentage
Sentence: So the director should answer the question to proof that the percentage of the positive reviewers can be the percise indicators.
Error: percise Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: Last, the memo states that the piblic is lack of the awarness of the movies of good quality are available.
Error: awarness Suggestion: awareness
Error: piblic Suggestion: public
Sentence: If everyone knows that the Super Screen-produced movies have the good quality, but there are other fact that lead to the fewer attendence.
Error: attendence Suggestion: No alternate word
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 7 2
Read a good grammar book.
No. of Spelling Errors: 7 2
Double check spelling errors.
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 7 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 7 2
No. of Sentences: 23 15
No. of Words: 386 350
No. of Characters: 1839 1500
No. of Different Words: 146 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.432 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.764 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.463 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 138 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 83 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 61 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 39 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 16.783 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.421 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.652 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.331 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.54 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.139 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 206, Rule ID: SHOULD_BE_DO[1]
Message: Did you mean 'answered'?
Suggestion: answered
...uestions among the memo which should be answer to make the memo more convincing. Th...
^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, however, if, moreover, so, still, then, for example
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 23.0 19.6327345309 117% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 12.9520958084 69% => OK
Conjunction : 6.0 11.1786427146 54% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 13.0 13.6137724551 95% => OK
Pronoun: 11.0 28.8173652695 38% => OK
Preposition: 45.0 55.5748502994 81% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 16.3942115768 43% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1896.0 2260.96107784 84% => OK
No of words: 386.0 441.139720559 88% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.91191709845 5.12650576532 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.43248042346 4.56307096286 97% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.57303842287 2.78398813304 92% => OK
Unique words: 152.0 204.123752495 74% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.39378238342 0.468620217663 84% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 591.3 705.55239521 84% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 1.0 4.96107784431 20% => OK
Article: 12.0 8.76447105788 137% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.70958083832 111% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.67365269461 239% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 19.7664670659 116% => OK
Sentence length: 16.0 22.8473053892 70% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 32.2758080965 57.8364921388 56% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 82.4347826087 119.503703932 69% => OK
Words per sentence: 16.7826086957 23.324526521 72% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.69565217391 5.70786347227 47% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.25449101796 19% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 8.20758483034 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.88822355289 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 9.0 4.67664670659 192% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.417435740097 0.218282227539 191% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.115739058704 0.0743258471296 156% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.106341320192 0.0701772020484 152% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.183622030912 0.128457276422 143% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.102985584304 0.0628817314937 164% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.1 14.3799401198 70% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 63.7 48.3550499002 132% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.4 12.197005988 69% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.9 12.5979740519 87% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 6.97 8.32208582834 84% => OK
difficult_words: 62.0 98.500998004 63% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 12.3882235529 65% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.4 11.1389221557 75% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 11.9071856287 67% => The average readability is low. Need to imporve the language.
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.