Q2 : Some people believe famous people's support towards international aid organizations draws the attention to problems, while others think celebrities make the problems less important. Discuss both views and give your opinions.
Recently, the impact of celebrities' support, such as donations, on ordinary people has become the subject of heated debate. Some people assert that influencers exert positive effect on the masses by supporting charities, while others argue otherwise. Personally, I wholeheartedly agree with the former stance. In the following essay, both views will be discussed before a conclusion is reached with my opinion.
On the one hand, those who claim that renowned people who support socially disadvantaged people negatively affect individuals do so for several reasons. Proponents of this argument insist that some entertainers exploit charitable activities in an undesirable way, causing individual people to become less interested in social problems. To exemplify, Kim Ki-Hun who is a singer in South Korea patronised a charitable organisation, which enabled him to achieve fame. However, according to an article released by the Seoul Times, it turned out that the main reason for his donation was receiving tax waivers. Given these points, some people hold the view that public figures can worsen the essence of aid.
My opinion, however, is that well-known people's help toward charitable foundations can contribute to an increase in the level of everyday people's attention to social problems. Perhaps the most compelling reason is that not only can famous people inform the public of serious problems, but they are also able to raise awareness amongst the masses considering that these people are often exposed to media. In addition, a multitude of fans of celebrities have a predisposition to participate in assistance when their idols partake in it. As an illustration, Lionel Messi spent approximately 3 million US dollars on a charitable institution in South Africa to deal with global hunger in 2018, which made it possible for numerous his keen supporters across the globe to pay attention to poverty, leading them to donate around 5 million US dollars. In light of the above, I find these more persuasive.
In conclusion, it is undeniable that there are a variety of opinions about this topic. However, after considering this matter in a careful manner, I fully support the view that celebrities' aid brings with it positives in society for the reasons discussed above.
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
|---|---|---|---|
| 2022-08-08 | idid382021 | 89 | view |
| 2022-08-03 | hellielts | 89 | view |
| 2022-07-28 | hellielts | 89 | view |
| 2022-07-28 | hellielts | 89 | view |
| 2021-09-19 | idid382002 | 89 | view |
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 242, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
Message: Consider replacing "in an undesirable way" with adverb for "undesirable"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
...ertainers exploit charitable activities in an undesirable way, causing individual people to become le...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 130, Rule ID: EVERYDAY_EVERY_DAY[3]
Message: 'Everyday' is an adjective. Did you mean 'every day'?
Suggestion: every day
...ntribute to an increase in the level of everyday peoples attention to social problems. P...
^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 127, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
Message: Consider replacing "in a careful manner" with adverb for "careful"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
... However, after considering this matter in a careful manner, I fully support the view that celebrit...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, however, if, so, well, while, in addition, in conclusion, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 10.0 13.1623246493 76% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 4.0 7.85571142285 51% => OK
Conjunction : 1.0 10.4138276553 10% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 16.0 7.30460921844 219% => Less relative clauses wanted (maybe 'which' is over used).
Pronoun: 35.0 24.0651302605 145% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 58.0 41.998997996 138% => OK
Nominalization: 11.0 8.3376753507 132% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1925.0 1615.20841683 119% => OK
No of words: 361.0 315.596192385 114% => OK
Chars per words: 5.3324099723 5.12529762239 104% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.35889894354 4.20363070211 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.93931010536 2.80592935109 105% => OK
Unique words: 227.0 176.041082164 129% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.628808864266 0.561755894193 112% => OK
syllable_count: 619.2 506.74238477 122% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.60771543086 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 5.43587174349 129% => OK
Article: 2.0 2.52805611222 79% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.10420841683 143% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 0.809619238477 124% => OK
Preposition: 9.0 4.76152304609 189% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 16.0 16.0721442886 100% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 20.2975951904 108% => OK
Sentence length SD: 61.9374684662 49.4020404114 125% => OK
Chars per sentence: 120.3125 106.682146367 113% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.5625 20.7667163134 109% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.75 7.06120827912 67% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.01903807615 60% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 8.67935871743 104% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.9879759519 75% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 3.4128256513 117% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.246935111809 0.244688304435 101% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0734388261944 0.084324248473 87% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0579643942917 0.0667982634062 87% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.147538392781 0.151304729494 98% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0391733735982 0.056905535591 69% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.0 13.0946893788 115% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 40.69 50.2224549098 81% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.44779559118 150% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.1 11.3001002004 116% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.93 12.4159519038 112% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.85 8.58950901804 115% => OK
difficult_words: 117.0 78.4519038076 149% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 9.78957915832 107% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 10.1190380762 107% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.7795591182 102% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 89.8876404494 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 8.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.