The following appeared in a memo from the marketing director of Top Dog Pet Stores.
"Five years ago Fish Emporium started advertising in the magazine Exotic Pets Monthly. Their stores saw sales increase by 15 percent after their ads began appearing in the magazine. The three Fish Emporium stores in Gulf City saw an even greater increase than that. Because Top Dog Pet Stores is based in Gulf City, it seems clear that we should start placing our own ads in Exotic Pets Monthly. If we do so, we will be sure to reverse the recent trend of declining sales and start making a profit again."
Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on these assumptions and what the implications are for the argument if the assumptions prove unwarranted.
This memo from the marketing director of Top Dog Pet Stores optimistically concludes that by providing advertisement on Exotic Pets Monthly can accelerate their sales as well as they can start making profit again. For reaching toward such conclusion we are provided by analysis which is increased sales of fishes. The given information has certain flaws and it is based on certain assumptions thus not sufficient to reach to conclusion.
First, the comparison is made between sales of fishes and dogs. How come the popularity of both these species is comparible? the assumption stands as the sales of their is comparable. Apart from that, the advertisement provided in the magazine Exotic Pets Monthly was started by Fish Emporium fice years ago and it states that the increase is by 15%. It clealy shows that the incresing sales is a long term progress. It is not fast as the marketing director thinks. Increase can take its own time, it can take 2 years or it may take 10 years as well. We don't know which one of these can happen in case of Dog Pet stores. Considering statistical data, we dont know that that sale is increased from 0% to 15% or from 40% to 55%. This is not reliable point.
Secondly, it is possible that there may be other reasons why the sales of dogs is decreased. By just providing the attractive advertisement sales can not be increased. The assumption made is that quality of dogs is not degraded. Whereas in the past years the quality of the dogs was perfect as demand of the customers. The degradation in the quality may be reason or increasing interest of people towards fish be the main reason for the recent trend of declined sales of dogs.
Moving ahead, gulf city has been most benificial by advertise of fishes in Exotic Pets Monthly that clearly don't show that it will provide such good results for sales of dogs also. We can not rely upon this assumption to reach up to conclution. It is possble that the people of gulf city had predilection for fishes rather than dogs. It is not possible that the people of gulf city will start liking dogs by seeing them in ads of Exotic Pets Monthly. Other than that there are several other ways possible which may neglected by the marketing director of Top Dog Pet Stores.
In the end, argument is inconvincing as it stands. More data and strong arguments could have been made to reach to the conclusion. The statisicial data could be added to make argument more powerful. Thus, the presented argument is not satisfactory as it lacks some necessary things.
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
Sentence: How come the popularity of both these species is comparible? the assumption stands as the sales of their is comparable.
Error: comparible Suggestion: comparable
Sentence: Apart from that, the advertisement provided in the magazine Exotic Pets Monthly was started by Fish Emporium fice years ago and it states that the increase is by 15.
Error: fice Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: It clealy shows that the incresing sales is a long term progress.
Error: clealy Suggestion: clearly
Error: incresing Suggestion: increasing
Sentence: Moving ahead, gulf city has been most benificial by advertise of fishes in Exotic Pets Monthly that clearly don't show that it will provide such good results for sales of dogs also.
Error: benificial Suggestion: beneficial
Sentence: We can not rely upon this assumption to reach up to conclution.
Error: conclution Suggestion: conclusion
Sentence: It is possble that the people of gulf city had predilection for fishes rather than dogs.
Error: possble Suggestion: possible
Sentence: In the end, argument is inconvincing as it stands.
Error: inconvincing Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: The statisicial data could be added to make argument more powerful.
Error: statisicial Suggestion: statistical
----------------
argument 1 -- OK
argument 2 -- OK
argument 3 -- OK
----------------
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.5 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 9 2
No. of Sentences: 26 15
No. of Words: 447 350
No. of Characters: 2041 1500
No. of Different Words: 209 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.598 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.566 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.578 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 124 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 91 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 70 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 46 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 17.192 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.301 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.423 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.271 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.47 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.103 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 127, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: The
...ty of both these species is comparible? the assumption stands as the sales of their...
^^^
Line 3, column 165, Rule ID: THEIR_IS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'there'?
Suggestion: there
...? the assumption stands as the sales of their is comparable. Apart from that, the adv...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 556, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
...ars or it may take 10 years as well. We dont know which one of these can happen in c...
^^^^
Line 3, column 656, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
...tores. Considering statistical data, we dont know that that sale is increased from 0...
^^^^
Line 3, column 757, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...40% to 55%. This is not reliable point. Secondly, it is possible that there may ...
^^^^^^
Line 5, column 231, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “Whereas” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...s that quality of dogs is not degraded. Whereas in the past years the quality of the do...
^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 110, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
...hes in Exotic Pets Monthly that clearly dont show that it will provide such good res...
^^^^
Line 7, column 177, Rule ID: ALSO_SENT_END[1]
Message: 'Also' is not used at the end of the sentence. Use 'as well' instead.
Suggestion: as well
...ide such good results for sales of dogs also. We can not rely upon this assumption t...
^^^^
Line 7, column 431, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...art liking dogs by seeing them in ads of Exotic Pets Monthly. Other than that the...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, first, if, may, second, secondly, so, thus, well, whereas, apart from, as well as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 29.0 19.6327345309 148% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 15.0 12.9520958084 116% => OK
Conjunction : 7.0 11.1786427146 63% => OK
Relative clauses : 16.0 13.6137724551 118% => OK
Pronoun: 39.0 28.8173652695 135% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 56.0 55.5748502994 101% => OK
Nominalization: 13.0 16.3942115768 79% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2115.0 2260.96107784 94% => OK
No of words: 445.0 441.139720559 101% => OK
Chars per words: 4.75280898876 5.12650576532 93% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.59293186426 4.56307096286 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.62289069762 2.78398813304 94% => OK
Unique words: 206.0 204.123752495 101% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.462921348315 0.468620217663 99% => OK
syllable_count: 644.4 705.55239521 91% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.59920159681 88% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 4.96107784431 222% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 8.0 8.76447105788 91% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 2.70958083832 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.22255489022 95% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 27.0 19.7664670659 137% => OK
Sentence length: 16.0 22.8473053892 70% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 43.0660640302 57.8364921388 74% => OK
Chars per sentence: 78.3333333333 119.503703932 66% => OK
Words per sentence: 16.4814814815 23.324526521 71% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.22222222222 5.70786347227 56% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 9.0 5.25449101796 171% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 16.0 8.20758483034 195% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.67664670659 150% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.323638639176 0.218282227539 148% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0764668601236 0.0743258471296 103% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0855546243641 0.0701772020484 122% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.168740038685 0.128457276422 131% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.102537121511 0.0628817314937 163% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 9.2 14.3799401198 64% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 72.16 48.3550499002 149% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 7.2 12.197005988 59% => Flesch kincaid grade is low.
coleman_liau_index: 9.97 12.5979740519 79% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.52 8.32208582834 90% => OK
difficult_words: 87.0 98.500998004 88% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 9.0 12.3882235529 73% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.4 11.1389221557 75% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.9071856287 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.