The following appeared in a newsletter published by the Appleton school district.
"In a recent study more than 5,000 adolescents were asked how often they ate meals with their families. Almost 30 percent of the teens said they ate at least seven meals per week with their families. Furthermore, according to the same survey, teens who reported having the most family meals per week were also the ones least likely to have tried illegal drugs, tobacco, and alcohol. Family meals were also associated with lower rates of problems such as low grades in school, low self- esteem, and depression. We therefore recommend that families have as many meals together as possible. We predict that doing so will greatly benefit adolescents and turn troubled teens away from bad behaviours."
Write a response in which you discuss which questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation is likely to have the predicted result. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.
In the above newsletter, the author argues that families should have as many meals together as possible with their adolescents since it will prevent them from turning into bad behaviours. The author bolstered his recommendation based on the premise of the survey report which states that adolescents who eat at least 7 meals per week with their family are less likely inclined to consume illegal substances since the author directly correlates the number of family meals per week with less exposer to illegal substances. Furthermore, the author supports his claim by stating that those who have more meals with their family have better grades and higher self-esteem. However, before evaluating the author’s argument three questions need to be answered.
Firstly, the author argues the efficacy of having the number of family meals with adolescents based on the survey without giving any admissible evidence regarding the survey. One may raise questions about the authenticity of the survey. Is the survey representative? Perhaps in the Appleton school district, there are 50000 adolescents. Then the sample size of the survey is too small for any conclusions. Furthermore, is the survey still representative? Maybe the survey is conducted 3 years ago, then one can not argue the effectiveness of having meals with the family. If any one of the above scenarios is true then the author’s argument is built unreliably. The author does not provide any necessary evidence regarding the survey. If the author can provide more information about the survey perhaps in the form of a statistical data set of each years report of all adolescents in the district then it will be possible to evaluate the author’s argument to a certain extent.
Secondly, the author states that having more family meals together will curb the penchant for turning to illegal substances without any evidence. Is family meals the only factor behind the less exposure to illegal substances? Maybe a few years back strict legal action and severe punishment upon consumption of drugs to curtail drug consumption among adolescents is the reason behind the illegal substance endemic. Perhaps after including the detrimental effects of drug consumption in each school’s curriculum adolescents are becoming more cognizant about their health and turning off from the drugs. The author does not provide any genuine evidence about the less consumption of drugs. If the author can provide more evidence perhaps in the form of a research survey regarding the reasons behind less drug consumption then it will prop up the author’s argument.
Thirdly, the author directly associates the number of having more meals with family with better grades and high self-esteem without any legitimate evidence. One may ask questions about the authenticity of the correlation of higher grades with the number of meals with family per week. In other words, are those related? Maybe most of the adolescents in the district do not live with their families. Even if this is not the case, parents of most adolescents have to do 3 jobs to support their family so they don’t have the chance of having meals with their adolescents on a regular basis. The author does not provide any data regarding his assumptions. The author has to provide more information perhaps in the form of a systematic research study regarding the efficacy of family meals on better grades and high self-esteem to rectify his argument otherwise, the author’s argument is seriously fictitious.
In conclusion, the author’s argument is flawed due to its reliance on several unwarranted assumptions. If the author is able to answer the three questions above and offer more evidence perhaps in the form of a systematic research study then it will be possible to evaluate the viability of the proposed recommendation that having families as many meals as possible with their adolescents will prevent them from bad behaviours.
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Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 9 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 4 2
No. of Sentences: 29 15
No. of Words: 635 350
No. of Characters: 3249 1500
No. of Different Words: 229 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 5.02 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.117 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.705 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 251 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 171 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 127 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 75 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 21.897 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 13.257 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.724 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.353 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.353 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.153 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 1 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 572, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “If” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...veness of having meals with the family. If any one of the above scenarios is true ...
^^
Line 2, column 735, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “If” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...ecessary evidence regarding the survey. If the author can provide more information...
^^
Line 3, column 820, Rule ID: LESS_MORE_THEN[1]
Message: Did you mean 'than'?
Suggestion: than
...he reasons behind less drug consumption then it will prop up the author’s argument. ...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
first, firstly, furthermore, however, if, may, regarding, second, secondly, so, still, then, third, thirdly, as to, at least, in conclusion, in other words
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 19.6327345309 97% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 12.9520958084 100% => OK
Conjunction : 6.0 11.1786427146 54% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 8.0 13.6137724551 59% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 28.0 28.8173652695 97% => OK
Preposition: 105.0 55.5748502994 189% => OK
Nominalization: 27.0 16.3942115768 165% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 3318.0 2260.96107784 147% => OK
No of words: 634.0 441.139720559 144% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.2334384858 5.12650576532 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 5.01790360848 4.56307096286 110% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.81836086362 2.78398813304 101% => OK
Unique words: 233.0 204.123752495 114% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.367507886435 0.468620217663 78% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 1036.8 705.55239521 147% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 0.0 4.96107784431 0% => OK
Article: 12.0 8.76447105788 137% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 2.70958083832 221% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.22255489022 95% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 29.0 19.7664670659 147% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 22.8473053892 92% => OK
Sentence length SD: 79.2729597045 57.8364921388 137% => OK
Chars per sentence: 114.413793103 119.503703932 96% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.8620689655 23.324526521 94% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.34482758621 5.70786347227 94% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.25449101796 57% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 6.0 8.20758483034 73% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 12.0 6.88822355289 174% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 11.0 4.67664670659 235% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.188312045931 0.218282227539 86% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0590808302849 0.0743258471296 79% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0569045830756 0.0701772020484 81% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.127294189629 0.128457276422 99% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0556105660694 0.0628817314937 88% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.1 14.3799401198 98% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 50.16 48.3550499002 104% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 12.197005988 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.05 12.5979740519 104% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.37 8.32208582834 89% => OK
difficult_words: 108.0 98.500998004 110% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 18.0 12.3882235529 145% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 11.1389221557 93% => OK
text_standard: 18.0 11.9071856287 151% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Write the essay in 30 minutes.
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.