The following appeared as a recommendation by a committee planning a ten-year budget for the city of Calatrava.
The birthrate in our city is declining: in fact, last year's birthrate was only one-half that of five years ago. Thus the number of students enrolled in our public schools will soon decrease dramatically, and we can safely reduce the funds budgeted for education during the next decade. At the same time, we can reduce funding for athletic playing fields and other recreational facilities. As a result, we will have sufficient money to fund city facilities and programs used primarily by adults, since we can expect the adult population of the city to increase.
Planning committee of Calatrava predicts a decrease in student population and an increase in adult population for ten years later. This committee wants to assign budget to adult’s facilities by cutting the funds for education and recreational facilities. This argument flawed in many reasons.
First, birthrate prediction in next ten years isn’t the same as last year. There is no evidence that shows birthrate will decrease. Maybe adults decide to have a baby in this year or next years. Moreover, committee didn’t consider immigration to this city. Even the birthrate decreases and the number of enrolled students in schools reduces, maybe migrated families have more children than the resident families in this city. Therefore, planning committee has to allocate budget to education. To strengthen this argument committee would have provided some information about migrated families and resident families age range in every ten years.
Second, the assumption stating a reduction in the number of people using athletic playing fields and other recreational facilities is vague. There is no evidence that proves people don’t want to use these facilities in next 10 years. Maybe the number of families that have 4-6 years old children will increase and both children and their parents want to play athletic sports.
Third, committee wants to fund city facilities used by adult more than other facilities. Every adult has different age range. Some of them like to use athletic fields but others want to use library or the old ones need healthcare systems and so on. Committee has to consider the age group of adults because allocating money just for one age group is not useful.
To conclude, planning committee has to consider information of age group of resident and migrated families in next 10 years because everything will change with the time goes.
- The following appeared as a recommendation by a committee planning a ten-year budget for the city of Calatrava.The birthrate in our city is declining: in fact, last year's birthrate was only one-half that of five years ago. Thus the number of student 63
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 18 15
No. of Words: 301 350
No. of Characters: 1524 1500
No. of Different Words: 148 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.165 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.063 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.608 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 109 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 89 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 76 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 37 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 16.722 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.781 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.333 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.327 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.327 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.068 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 1 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 336, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...dren will increase and both children and their parents want to play athletic spor...
^^
Line 5, column 175, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...rything will change with the time goes.
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, if, may, moreover, second, so, then, therefore, third, as to
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 4.0 19.6327345309 20% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 5.0 12.9520958084 39% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 11.1786427146 107% => OK
Relative clauses : 3.0 13.6137724551 22% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 12.0 28.8173652695 42% => OK
Preposition: 40.0 55.5748502994 72% => OK
Nominalization: 14.0 16.3942115768 85% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1582.0 2260.96107784 70% => OK
No of words: 298.0 441.139720559 68% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.30872483221 5.12650576532 104% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.15483772266 4.56307096286 91% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.70435656579 2.78398813304 97% => OK
Unique words: 147.0 204.123752495 72% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.493288590604 0.468620217663 105% => OK
syllable_count: 496.8 705.55239521 70% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 2.0 4.96107784431 40% => OK
Article: 1.0 8.76447105788 11% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 2.70958083832 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.22255489022 47% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 19.7664670659 91% => OK
Sentence length: 16.0 22.8473053892 70% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 42.4728308219 57.8364921388 73% => OK
Chars per sentence: 87.8888888889 119.503703932 74% => OK
Words per sentence: 16.5555555556 23.324526521 71% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.0 5.70786347227 70% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.25449101796 38% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 8.20758483034 61% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 6.88822355289 87% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.67664670659 150% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.217491577858 0.218282227539 100% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0735539210006 0.0743258471296 99% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0712629392069 0.0701772020484 102% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.119945334754 0.128457276422 93% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0584423265609 0.0628817314937 93% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.9 14.3799401198 83% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 46.78 48.3550499002 97% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 12.197005988 88% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.22 12.5979740519 105% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.87 8.32208582834 95% => OK
difficult_words: 65.0 98.500998004 66% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 6.5 12.3882235529 52% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 8.4 11.1389221557 75% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.9071856287 92% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.