The following is a memo given to the residents of a housing complex.
"Studies show that in 70 percent of traffic accidents, at least one driver involved is less than 10 miles from home when the accident occurs. This statistic indicates that drivers have a tendency to drive incautiously when they are close to home, probably because familiar surroundings give them a false sense of security. Thus, the places where people feel safest are the places where they are in fact at greatest risk of serious injury.”
The memo in the above paragraph argues that the places where the people feel the safest are the places of the most serious injury. However, on close scrutiny of the facts presented in the argument above one can easily see that the facts are filled with gaping holes and one can conclude that the memo above is terribly flawed.
The memo first states that in 70 percent of the accident involved at least one driver is less than 10 miles away from the home when the accident occurs. Over here the statement sounds quite vague as it does not clearly say from where the data was taken. Were these accident near the housing society where this memo was given neither does it tell the approximate figure of the no of accidents neither the time duration over which these accidents were recorded and this makes the argument very weak. Because is the accidents were recorded over the period of 2 years and if the total number of accidents were 10 then only seven accidents involved drivers who were less than 1 miles from their homes. Because of this fallacy one cannot exactly fathom the carelessness of the drivers who were close to their homes.
Then the argument neither mentioned the season nor does it mentioned the type of vehicles involved in the accidents neither does it dwell upon any more details on how the accidents take place like, a head on collision, collision due to vehicles directly ramming into any barriers, engine failure or accidents during overtaking other vehicles. So, it becomes very difficult to identify the exact reason of this accidents making the claim sound very hollow.
The study neither mentions who is at fault in most of these accidents as it might be the case that drivers who are familiar with the area may be driving normally considering all factors involved in the terrain but the drivers who do not have any experience of that area might drive either recklessly or too cautiously ignoring the limits of that road thereby causing accidents so we cannot be sure of the facts that the drivers who are near to their homes are the only ones to be blamed in these accident as being familiar with the area they are likely to drive better in that area as compared to people who are unfamiliar with that area.
This brings us to the next flaw in the argument that is the memo nowhere mentions the geographical terrain where the accidents took place as if it were a sharp curve or a steep slope the probability of accidents increases manifold. Not only terrain the memo also does not mention the weather conditions in which the accident took place as on a rainy, snowy or foggy day accidents are bound to happen due to various factors such as slippery roads, lack of visibility etc.
And over here we must also consider the state of drivers in which they were driving their motor vehicles as multiple accidents may also be due to cases like drink and drive, road rage or some drivers who indulge in racing on roads so it would be unfair to put the entire blame on drivers who lived nearby and thereby stating that whenever people fell the safest are the places of most serious accidents. Sure, some of these accidents might have happened due to the above-mentioned habit in the memo but to put the blame of nearly all the accidents on that trait of people seems quite unfair to me.
Hence, I would say that the memo above is neither persuasive nor factual. It has failed to present any credible evidence for the facts it has tried to present.
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
|---|---|---|---|
| 2023-07-22 | Tanmay Shikhare | 68 | view |
| 2023-07-18 | Tanmay Shikhare | 78 | view |
| 2020-07-22 | yash99 | 60 | view |
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Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 4 2
No. of Sentences: 17 15
No. of Words: 618 350
No. of Characters: 2818 1500
No. of Different Words: 268 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.986 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.56 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.256 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 175 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 130 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 82 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 41 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 36.353 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 23.045 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.588 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.347 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.347 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.141 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 1 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 144, Rule ID: CLOSE_SCRUTINY[1]
Message: Use simply 'scrutiny'.
Suggestion: scrutiny
...of the most serious injury. However, on close scrutiny of the facts presented in the argument ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 259, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this accident' or 'these accidents'?
Suggestion: this accident; these accidents
...say from where the data was taken. Were these accident near the housing society where this mem...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 376, Rule ID: NOW[2]
Message: Did you mean 'now' (=at this moment) instead of 'no' (negation)?
Suggestion: now
...s it tell the approximate figure of the no of accidents neither the time duration ...
^^
Line 2, column 697, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “Because” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...ere less than 1 miles from their homes. Because of this fallacy one cannot exactly fath...
^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 491, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this accident' or 'these accidents'?
Suggestion: this accident; these accidents
...homes are the only ones to be blamed in these accident as being familiar with the area they ar...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, hence, however, if, may, so, then, well, at least, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 32.0 19.6327345309 163% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 12.9520958084 93% => OK
Conjunction : 15.0 11.1786427146 134% => OK
Relative clauses : 31.0 13.6137724551 228% => Less relative clauses wanted (maybe 'which' is over used).
Pronoun: 45.0 28.8173652695 156% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 84.0 55.5748502994 151% => OK
Nominalization: 9.0 16.3942115768 55% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2857.0 2260.96107784 126% => OK
No of words: 618.0 441.139720559 140% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.62297734628 5.12650576532 90% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.98594081286 4.56307096286 109% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.28484522334 2.78398813304 82% => OK
Unique words: 269.0 204.123752495 132% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.435275080906 0.468620217663 93% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 926.1 705.55239521 131% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 4.96107784431 81% => OK
Article: 4.0 8.76447105788 46% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.70958083832 74% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 16.0 19.7664670659 81% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 38.0 22.8473053892 166% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 140.499874889 57.8364921388 243% => The lengths of sentences changed so frequently.
Chars per sentence: 178.5625 119.503703932 149% => OK
Words per sentence: 38.625 23.324526521 166% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.75 5.70786347227 83% => OK
Paragraphs: 7.0 5.15768463074 136% => Less paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 5.0 5.25449101796 95% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 0.0 8.20758483034 0% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 15.0 6.88822355289 218% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.67664670659 21% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.313339327069 0.218282227539 144% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.115610777327 0.0743258471296 156% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.125501769676 0.0701772020484 179% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.133625732235 0.128457276422 104% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.107937543558 0.0628817314937 172% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 19.6 14.3799401198 136% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 41.37 48.3550499002 86% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 16.9 12.197005988 139% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.11 12.5979740519 80% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.2 8.32208582834 99% => OK
difficult_words: 105.0 98.500998004 107% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 12.5 12.3882235529 101% => OK
gunning_fog: 17.2 11.1389221557 154% => OK
text_standard: 17.0 11.9071856287 143% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Write the essay in 30 minutes.
Maximum six paragraphs wanted.
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.