A recent study rating 300 male and female Mentian advertising executives according to the average number of hours they sleep per night showed an association between the amount of sleep the executives need and the success of their firms. Of the advertising
From the recent study carried out in the advertising agency on the executives, the results suggests for a business to thrive, it should hire only people who need less than 6hrs of sleep per night. However, this assumption cannot be generalized, thus three questions must be answered before this recommendation can be properly evaluated.
First of all, what is the possibility that the current study done, comprises of an adequate number of company executives? the author avers that the study was done on 300 male and female staff, is that number enough to draw an overall conclusion? Maybe, the research carried out, was done on only a few executives, rather than the majority of top executives in the various cooperations.Perhaps, these few which partook in the case study are just a little fraction of the executives and they are most likely the few who happen to be normally producticve at work despite their sleeping habits. Furthermore, the author asserts that the study was carried out in different advertising companies. Perhaps, sleeping such number of hours at night may not affect the output of the executives, and maybe in other companies, such as the oil companies, that can be seen as inadequate rest time.If the above mentioned scenario is true, then the original argument does not hold water.
Secondly,are the tasks peformed in these firms carried out only by only the bosses? Maybe, these bosses only make up a small number of people in these firms.There is a high chance that most of the hard work which makes these companies excel are done by the subordinates who work tirelessly at the bottom and the result is seen at the top. Perchance, the author gives credit to only the executives who will be unable to achieve such without the input from their junior colleagues, who obviously are not accounted for in the study. If the statement above has merit, then the conclusion drawn from the original argument is significantly weakened.
Thirdly, what if these firms with higher profit margins have these high profits as a result of other underlying factors? These underlying factors could be good customer relationship and a conducive work environment which continually brings clients back to the same firm
Maybe when the clients compare these advertising cooperations with others which they have done business with, they realise how the company has inculcated such friendly attitude in their workers, which creates a conducive atmosphere to conduct business, hence the reason for the continuous businesswhich leads to more gain. Moreover, one cannot limit sleeping to only night time, as there may be times when some executives may have taken a few minutes nap while at work and that may have improved their productivity. If either of these scenarios is true, then the argument is flawed.
In conclusion, the argument as it stands, is significantly flawed due to it's reliance on several unwarranted assumptions. If the author is able to answer the three questions above and provide more evidence in the form of a more systematic research, then it will be possible to evaluate the viability of the recommendation.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 141, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...for a business to thrive, it should hire only people who need less than 6hrs of s...
^^
Line 1, column 339, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...commendation can be properly evaluated. First of all, what is the possibility th...
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Line 3, column 68, Rule ID: COMPRISES_OF[1]
Message: Did you mean 'comprises' or 'consists of'?
Suggestion: comprises; consists of
...ossibility that the current study done, comprises of an adequate number of company executive...
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Line 3, column 123, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: The
... adequate number of company executives? the author avers that the study was done on...
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Line 3, column 386, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Perhaps
... executives in the various cooperations.Perhaps, these few which partook in the case st...
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Line 3, column 883, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: If
...hat can be seen as inadequate rest time.If the above mentioned scenario is true, t...
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Line 3, column 972, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... original argument does not hold water. Secondly,are the tasks peformed in these...
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Line 5, column 9, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , are
...ument does not hold water. Secondly,are the tasks peformed in these firms carri...
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Line 5, column 118, Rule ID: SMALL_NUMBER_OF[1]
Message: Specify a number, remove phrase, use 'a few', or use 'some'
Suggestion: a few; some
...osses? Maybe, these bosses only make up a small number of people in these firms.There is a high c...
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Line 5, column 158, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: There
...a small number of people in these firms.There is a high chance that most of the hard ...
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Line 7, column 156, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...tors? These underlying factors could be good customer relationship and a conduci...
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Line 7, column 272, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...lly brings clients back to the same firm Maybe when the clients compare these adv...
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Line 8, column 437, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...imes when some executives may have taken a few minutes nap while at work and that...
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Transition Words or Phrases used:
first, furthermore, hence, however, if, may, moreover, second, secondly, so, then, third, thirdly, thus, while, in conclusion, such as, as a result, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 27.0 19.6327345309 138% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 12.9520958084 108% => OK
Conjunction : 7.0 11.1786427146 63% => OK
Relative clauses : 19.0 13.6137724551 140% => OK
Pronoun: 30.0 28.8173652695 104% => OK
Preposition: 65.0 55.5748502994 117% => OK
Nominalization: 12.0 16.3942115768 73% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2630.0 2260.96107784 116% => OK
No of words: 517.0 441.139720559 117% => OK
Chars per words: 5.08704061896 5.12650576532 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.76839952204 4.56307096286 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.85422456671 2.78398813304 103% => OK
Unique words: 259.0 204.123752495 127% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.500967117988 0.468620217663 107% => OK
syllable_count: 828.9 705.55239521 117% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 4.96107784431 141% => OK
Article: 6.0 8.76447105788 68% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 2.70958083832 185% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.22255489022 47% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 19.7664670659 86% => OK
Sentence length: 30.0 22.8473053892 131% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 102.469237514 57.8364921388 177% => OK
Chars per sentence: 154.705882353 119.503703932 129% => OK
Words per sentence: 30.4117647059 23.324526521 130% => OK
Discourse Markers: 9.47058823529 5.70786347227 166% => OK
Paragraphs: 6.0 5.15768463074 116% => OK
Language errors: 13.0 5.25449101796 247% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 8.20758483034 134% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 6.88822355289 15% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.67664670659 107% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.19114669082 0.218282227539 88% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0605090940365 0.0743258471296 81% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0590464735989 0.0701772020484 84% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.088149688852 0.128457276422 69% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0770254771731 0.0628817314937 122% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 17.7 14.3799401198 123% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 41.03 48.3550499002 85% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.1628742515 156% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 15.0 12.197005988 123% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.83 12.5979740519 102% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.79 8.32208582834 106% => OK
difficult_words: 120.0 98.500998004 122% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 12.3882235529 93% => OK
gunning_fog: 14.0 11.1389221557 126% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.9071856287 101% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 75.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.