The vice president of human resources at Climpson Industries sent the following recommendation to the company's president.
"In an effort to improve our employees' productivity, we should implement electronic monitoring of employees' Internet use from their workstations. Employees who use the Internet from their workstations need to be identified and punished if we are to reduce the number of work hours spent on personal or recreational activities, such as shopping or playing games. By installing software to detect employees' Internet use on company computers, we can prevent employees from wasting time, foster a better work ethic at Climpson, and improve our overall profits."
Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on these assumptions and what the implications are for the argument if the assumptions prove unwarranted.
The vice president of human resources at Climpson industries concludes, that by installing software that detects the employees' internet usage on company computers can help prevent employees wasting their time on personal or recreational activities and improve their overall profits. Although, the cited evidences seem logical and probable, however, the assumptions on which the conclusion relies does not lend credible support to the argument. Hence the argument seems logically unconvincing in several aspects.
Firstly, the vice president assumes that employees who are using internet on the company's computers are actually wasting time on personal recreational activities such as shopping or playing games. But, it may happen that these employees are actually using the internet to search for things related to some conundrum that they encounter while doing their work. For instance, an employee might struggle solving some complex problem or maybe facing an error while writing some code. The employees maybe some programmers who often use several websites in order to get help in solving certain programming errors or use the internet to know about any concept related to their work. In this scenario preventing these employees from using the internet can be unfair to them as they are showing immense dedication and diligence in obtaining excellence in their work. Moreover, is the new software capable of identifying why was the internet used by the employees in addition to measuring the duration its usage?. Only by providing this information can one guarantee that the new software that is to be installed will be effective in increasing the productivity of employees.
In addition to this the author assumes that all of the employees who use internet waste their time on internet. It may happen that only a few of these employees are wasting their time, while most of them are productive and sedulous in their works. Since the author has not provided any statistical figures which could have strengthened the argument, the assumption seems irrelevant to the conclusion. Also, suppose some of the employees who have worked hard for the entire day , try to take break from the exhaustive work hours and use the internet for their own pleasure.In this case the new software will falsely indicate that these employees have been unproductive and not dedicated towards their work.Thus, it would be unfair to punish these employees.This in turn, would create adverse effects on the company's goal of increasing productivity and profits as the employees will begin to lose their determination and interest in completing their work.
Finally the author assumes that the employees, wasting time on internet, is the only factor responsible for their unproductivity. However, some employees may be wasting their time by wandering in their workplaces and chit-chatting with other employees. This factor may also lead to the decreasing unproductivity in their work environment. Thus the company should focus on improving this problem instead of wasting their money on installing software to detect the employee's internet usage time. To strengthen the argument, the author should have provided with more factors that could be attributed to unproductivity among the employees.
To sum up, the argument consists of certain obvious fallacies and loopholes. The argument is based on certain stated/unstated assumptions such as accuracy and high reliability of the new software that are to be installed, high number of employees wasting their time on the company's computers, increasing profits and improving work ethics by punishing the employees for their unproductivity. Relying on these doubtful assumptions and considering them to be true makes the conclusion irrelevant and unconvincing as it stands.
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Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 12 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 7 2
No. of Sentences: 23 15
No. of Words: 594 350
No. of Characters: 3157 1500
No. of Different Words: 255 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.937 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.315 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.823 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 231 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 205 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 151 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 100 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 25.826 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 15.29 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.652 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.324 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.502 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.097 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 118, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'employees'' or 'employee's'?
Suggestion: employees'; employee's
...by installing software that detects the employees internet usage on company computers can...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 445, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Hence,
... lend credible support to the argument. Hence the argument seems logically unconvinci...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 338, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...d to their work problems. For instance, a employee might be floundering in solvin...
^
Line 3, column 502, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...rogrammers often use several websites in order to get help in solving certain pro...
^^
Line 5, column 45, Rule ID: ALL_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'all the'.
Suggestion: all the
...ddition to this the author assumes that all of the employees who use internet waste their ...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 415, Rule ID: SOME_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'some'.
Suggestion: some
...levant to the conclusion. Also, suppose some of the employees who have worked hard for the ...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 476, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
... who have worked hard for the entire day , try to take break from the exhaustive w...
^^
Line 5, column 572, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: In
...use the internet for their own pleasure.In this case the new software will falsely...
^^
Line 5, column 705, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Thus
...ve and not dedicated towards their work.Thus, it would be unfair to punish these emp...
^^^^
Line 5, column 756, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: This
...uld be unfair to punish these employees.This in turn, would create adverse effects o...
^^^^
Line 7, column 1, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Finally,
...increasing productivity and profits. Finally the author assumes that the employees w...
^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 340, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Thus,
...productivity in their work environment. Thus the company should focus on improving t...
^^^^
Line 7, column 464, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'employees'' or 'employee's'?
Suggestion: employees'; employee's
...ey on installing software to detect the employees internet usage time. To strengthen the ...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 540, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...rengthen the argument, the author should have provided with more factors that cou...
^^
Line 9, column 99, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ies and loopholes. The argument is based on certain stated/unstated assumptions s...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, also, but, finally, first, firstly, hence, however, if, may, moreover, so, then, thus, while, for instance, in addition, such as, to sum up
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 24.0 19.6327345309 122% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 16.0 12.9520958084 124% => OK
Conjunction : 17.0 11.1786427146 152% => OK
Relative clauses : 18.0 13.6137724551 132% => OK
Pronoun: 49.0 28.8173652695 170% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 74.0 55.5748502994 133% => OK
Nominalization: 16.0 16.3942115768 98% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 3096.0 2260.96107784 137% => OK
No of words: 568.0 441.139720559 129% => OK
Chars per words: 5.45070422535 5.12650576532 106% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.88187981987 4.56307096286 107% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.9672920442 2.78398813304 107% => OK
Unique words: 257.0 204.123752495 126% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.452464788732 0.468620217663 97% => OK
syllable_count: 945.9 705.55239521 134% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 4.96107784431 121% => OK
Article: 9.0 8.76447105788 103% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.70958083832 37% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.22255489022 142% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 19.7664670659 111% => OK
Sentence length: 25.0 22.8473053892 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 84.959348568 57.8364921388 147% => OK
Chars per sentence: 140.727272727 119.503703932 118% => OK
Words per sentence: 25.8181818182 23.324526521 111% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.77272727273 5.70786347227 119% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 15.0 5.25449101796 285% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 8.20758483034 85% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 14.0 6.88822355289 203% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.67664670659 21% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.280956655729 0.218282227539 129% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0923602387747 0.0743258471296 124% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.085299254131 0.0701772020484 122% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.176105038477 0.128457276422 137% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0514832521859 0.0628817314937 82% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 17.1 14.3799401198 119% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 37.64 48.3550499002 78% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 14.2 12.197005988 116% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.63 12.5979740519 116% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.77 8.32208582834 105% => OK
difficult_words: 140.0 98.500998004 142% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.5 12.3882235529 117% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.0 11.1389221557 108% => OK
text_standard: 15.0 11.9071856287 126% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.