Because of funding limits, many schools are cutting back on what they see as “fringe” disciplines, such as music education. This is a mistake. Since music education is important even beyond the enjoyment it brings to the knowledgeable listener, its funding should be protected.
Write a response to the recommendation in which you discuss why you either agree or disagree with it, using a hypothetical set of circumstances to illustrate the consequences of accepting or rejecting the recommendation. Support your response with evidence and/or examples.
Getting up early in the morning, running to our workplaces to exhaust ourselves throughout the day is the daily life of most of us. Coming back home all tired, we all seek something that energises us again; that something might be a movie, a dance show, mostly music, meaning any type of art. Art is what relaxes us, elates us after a long day at work. Music is one such art. It can not only soothe us but can do much more. It can inspire you when you’re down, can make busy people understand the pain of a suffering individual, it can also motivate you to do what you want to. It can create a revolution. One such discipline should be inculcated in the school’s curriculum for many reasons.
We all know every child is different with varying perception, skills and interests. In the schools, they are to be guided to find their passion. Helping them see through all the paths they can take in their careers is important. If music is one of their interests, they deserve the opportunity to learn some in their schooling itself.
We all push children to become an engineer, a doctor, a successful person but we actually want them to earn properly. Success is not about money. If a boy or a girl wants to become a musician, what’s the point in educating them to be someone else? He belies his own interests and studies hard all his childhood and then goes in search to become a good musician just to leave in waste all the hardwork he put in school. If he could have been introduced to music in school itself, he would have known what he wanted. He wouldn’t have wasted his childhood on the lectures he wouldn’t use anywhere in his life. He gave up years for something he didn’t want which rather would have been proficial if put into music classes.
Some might argue that preference should be given to other theoretical classes that make them a scientist, but a person without any proper interest in an enormous field like science, medicine, engineering will either end up losing or being unhappy for the rest of his career. Which is detrimental not just to him but to the society that seeks help from such doctor or an engineer. For all these various reasons, it is better to always include music as a discipline not just for the interests of the children, but also for the pleasant evenings every person after work longs for, for every person who needs some hope or inspiration and to every one of us.
- Because of funding limits many schools are cutting back on what they see as fringe disciplines such as music education This is a mistake Since music education is important even beyond the enjoyment it brings to the knowledgeable listener its funding shoul 75
- Because of funding limits, many schools are cutting back on what they see as “fringe” disciplines, such as music education. This is a mistake. Since music education is important even beyond the enjoyment it brings to the knowledgeable listener, its fu 50
- Some people argue that confidence and optimism are critical to achieving a dream, while others believe that selfless hard work is the only way to reach a goal.Write a response in which you determine which view bears the closest resemblance to your own. In 58
- Because of funding limits, many schools are cutting back on what they see as “fringe” disciplines, such as music education. This is a mistake. Since music education is important even beyond the enjoyment it brings to the knowledgeable listener, its fu 83
- The following is a memorandum from the marketing department of a computer manufacturer.“We need a new strategy in our ads promoting our line of laptop computers. Surveys show that laptop purchasers consider reliability more important than any other qual 55
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 584, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
...so motivate you to do what you want to. It can create a revolution. One such disci...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, also, but, if, so, then
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 18.0 19.5258426966 92% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 15.0 12.4196629213 121% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 14.8657303371 87% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 11.3162921348 80% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 55.0 33.0505617978 166% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 55.0 58.6224719101 94% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 12.9106741573 39% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2014.0 2235.4752809 90% => OK
No of words: 437.0 442.535393258 99% => OK
Chars per words: 4.60869565217 5.05705443957 91% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.57214883401 4.55969084622 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.58920617284 2.79657885939 93% => OK
Unique words: 240.0 215.323595506 111% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.549199084668 0.4932671777 111% => OK
syllable_count: 622.8 704.065955056 88% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.59117977528 88% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 15.0 6.24550561798 240% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 3.0 4.99550561798 60% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.10617977528 97% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.77640449438 113% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.38483146067 23% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 20.2370786517 109% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 23.0359550562 82% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 65.7894211396 60.3974514979 109% => OK
Chars per sentence: 91.5454545455 118.986275619 77% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.8636363636 23.4991977007 85% => OK
Discourse Markers: 1.5 5.21951772744 29% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 7.80617977528 13% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 10.2758426966 136% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 5.13820224719 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.83258426966 83% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.141360176181 0.243740707755 58% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0460863213482 0.0831039109588 55% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.046422456768 0.0758088955206 61% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0801353695805 0.150359130593 53% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0296436032616 0.0667264976115 44% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.2 14.1392134831 72% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 69.11 48.8420337079 141% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.92365168539 39% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.3 12.1743820225 68% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.46 12.1639044944 78% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.47 8.38706741573 89% => OK
difficult_words: 80.0 100.480337079 80% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 7.5 11.8971910112 63% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 11.2143820225 86% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 11.7820224719 68% => The average readability is low. Need to imporve the language.
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.