Recently, there is an increasing trend of young people widening their horizons by doing a balancing act of advancing their career or education and pursuing other valued interests such as travelling and volunteering. A valid and crucial point on one side is the need for focus and prioritization on education and work alone. While others are avidly advocating diversifying their experience by going abroad or exploring their hobbies. This essay will discuss why it is advantageous for a person to pursue worthy goals such as studying and working while doing other interests.
Firstly, people perform at their best when they focus on a single goal whether it's education or career. Putting your energies into advancement and improvement is crucial in building personal and organizational capability. For example, professionals who spend most of their time on completing postgraduate studies are preferred to be hired by companies because they prove to be high performers in the workplace. Thus, focusing on studies and career bring about much benefits and rewards.
Secondly, there are people who believe adding multiple and different cultural and personally edifying experiences will help individuals succeed more at work and at school. Due to increased social awareness and cultural exposure, people who do travel, arts, music and other noteworthy undertakings are more creative and level-headed in their thoughts and actions. As an example, students who involved themselves in exchange and volunteer programs in foreign countries performed better at school when they came back. This is solid and unrefutable proof that adding experiential learning to study and work increases the ability of a person to widen his knowledge and perspective.
In conclusion, while others may believe that focusing on a single endeavor will guarantee greater success, a more convincing proposition is having wider and broader experiences to benefit self and others.
- In towns and cities, large shopping malls should replace the small local shop. Do you agree or disagree? 77
- Roles of government, companies and individuals to combat climate change 88
- Nowadays, television is an essential part of our lives, as a medium to spread news and awareness, and, for some, it even acts as a companion. What is your opinion about this? 72
- Life experience is better than books or formal education? Agree or disagree? 77
- More and more students are choosing to study at colleges and universities in a foreign country. Do the benefits of studying abroad outweigh the drawbacks? 85
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 461, Rule ID: MUCH_COUNTABLE[1]
Message: Use 'many' with countable nouns.
Suggestion: many
...using on studies and career bring about much benefits and rewards. Secondly, ther...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
first, firstly, if, may, second, secondly, so, thus, while, for example, in conclusion, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 13.1623246493 91% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 5.0 7.85571142285 64% => OK
Conjunction : 26.0 10.4138276553 250% => Less conjunction wanted
Relative clauses : 8.0 7.30460921844 110% => OK
Pronoun: 19.0 24.0651302605 79% => OK
Preposition: 32.0 41.998997996 76% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 8.3376753507 96% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1655.0 1615.20841683 102% => OK
No of words: 300.0 315.596192385 95% => OK
Chars per words: 5.51666666667 5.12529762239 108% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.16179145029 4.20363070211 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.97256155903 2.80592935109 106% => OK
Unique words: 185.0 176.041082164 105% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.616666666667 0.561755894193 110% => OK
syllable_count: 510.3 506.74238477 101% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.60771543086 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 2.0 5.43587174349 37% => OK
Article: 2.0 2.52805611222 79% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.10420841683 143% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 0.809619238477 0% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.76152304609 21% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 13.0 16.0721442886 81% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 23.0 20.2975951904 113% => OK
Sentence length SD: 42.3839871516 49.4020404114 86% => OK
Chars per sentence: 127.307692308 106.682146367 119% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.0769230769 20.7667163134 111% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.30769230769 7.06120827912 103% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.01903807615 20% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 8.67935871743 115% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.9879759519 25% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 3.4128256513 59% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.167545139049 0.244688304435 68% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0560016492366 0.084324248473 66% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0511274434369 0.0667982634062 77% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0897752423317 0.151304729494 59% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0587702206869 0.056905535591 103% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 16.1 13.0946893788 123% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 39.67 50.2224549098 79% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.44779559118 118% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.4 11.3001002004 119% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 15.03 12.4159519038 121% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 10.3 8.58950901804 120% => OK
difficult_words: 105.0 78.4519038076 134% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 9.78957915832 117% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 10.1190380762 111% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.7795591182 111% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 89.8876404494 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 8.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.