Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Movies and television have more negative effects than positive effects on the way young people behave. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer
After developments in technolgy which maked the electrical devices production less costly television can be found in everyone's house and nowadays, the numrous programs take much time of our life. there is a debate in this case as to whether the positive effects of watching television programs are more than negetive effects or not. An outstanding argument states that young people will negetively affected from movies, but I repudiate it strongly. In the folloiwng paragraphs, I will elaborate on my viewpoint through two noticeable reasons.
The first idea, which deserves some words here, is that while many crimes are because of having nothing to do, funny programs ,like competitions and sports, entertains young people and avoid them to think in criminal way. according to recently conducted study which has been done by Iranian Center of Statistics (ICS), 30 percents of theft crimes is not according to low salary, but due to having nothing to be entertained. this clearly demonstrates the idea that the feeling of ciourius nad boreness should be respected in some way. Henceforth, television programs can play this role, and have positiove effects in people's juvenile.
Another equally significant point is that, one of the best ways of teaching social behaviors is through video programs. videos and movies can explain bad social behaviores indirectly, and teach youngesters to correct them in a better way than books or their parent's do. For instance, there are some religious programs which young people could learn religion rules in showing kindness and being supportive in sociaty, and also other programs which teach people driving rules. Therefore, by learning indirectly from television programs youngesters could have more peaceful and relax social life.
In summary, all the presented ideas above bring us to the conclusion that not only television and movies not persuade young man or womans, but also they can help them to act more helpful for themselves, and sociaty. However, some movies and programs have negative effects on their life, this effect is less than those positive effects mentiond above.
- TPO 38 3
- Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Leadership comes naturally: one cannot learn to be a leader. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. 71
- TPO 41 70
- Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Movies and television have more negative effects than positive effects on the way young people behave. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer 76
- TOEFL TPO 40- Integrated Writing Task 61
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 60, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'devices'' or 'device's'?
Suggestion: devices'; device's
...in technolgy which maked the electrical devices production less costly television can b...
^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 197, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: There
...us programs take much time of our life. there is a debate in this case as to whether ...
^^^^^
Line 1, column 228, Rule ID: WHETHER[6]
Message: Can you shorten this phrase to just 'whether', or rephrase the sentence to avoid "as to"?
Suggestion: whether
...ur life. there is a debate in this case as to whether the positive effects of watching televi...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 126, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
... of having nothing to do, funny programs ,like competitions and sports, entertains...
^^
Line 3, column 223, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: According
...nd avoid them to think in criminal way. according to recently conducted study which has b...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 423, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: This
...ue to having nothing to be entertained. this clearly demonstrates the idea that the ...
^^^^
Line 5, column 121, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Videos
...al behaviors is through video programs. videos and movies can explain bad social behav...
^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, hence, however, if, so, therefore, while, as to, for instance, in summary
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 15.1003584229 93% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 9.8082437276 92% => OK
Conjunction : 18.0 13.8261648746 130% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 11.0286738351 91% => OK
Pronoun: 23.0 43.0788530466 53% => OK
Preposition: 41.0 52.1666666667 79% => OK
Nominalization: 3.0 8.0752688172 37% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1796.0 1977.66487455 91% => OK
No of words: 338.0 407.700716846 83% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.31360946746 4.8611393121 109% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.28774723029 4.48103885553 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.65187138338 2.67179642975 99% => OK
Unique words: 206.0 212.727598566 97% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.609467455621 0.524837075471 116% => OK
syllable_count: 549.0 618.680645161 89% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 9.59856630824 31% => OK
Article: 3.0 3.08781362007 97% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 3.51792114695 28% => OK
Conjunction: 7.0 1.86738351254 375% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 6.0 4.94265232975 121% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 14.0 20.6003584229 68% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 24.0 20.1344086022 119% => OK
Sentence length SD: 44.5608961915 48.9658058833 91% => OK
Chars per sentence: 128.285714286 100.406767564 128% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.1428571429 20.6045352989 117% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.5 5.45110844103 119% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 7.0 5.5376344086 126% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 11.8709677419 67% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 3.85842293907 130% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.88709677419 20% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.249161068317 0.236089414692 106% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0881685469639 0.076458572812 115% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0784711283436 0.0737576698707 106% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.158238470661 0.150856017488 105% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.046430436631 0.0645574589148 72% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.7 11.7677419355 133% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 47.12 58.1214874552 81% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.7 10.1575268817 125% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.81 10.9000537634 127% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.45 8.01818996416 118% => OK
difficult_words: 99.0 86.8835125448 114% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 10.002688172 115% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 10.0537634409 115% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 76.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 23.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.