Governments should spend more money in sponsoring arts than in athletics (like state Olympics team).
Arts are an essential aspect of people's lives; they could bring peace and happiness to societies, and they are the means of criticizing various matters subtly without provoking authorities. Governments should provide more financial sponsoring in arts rather than in sports. This article would demonstrate advantageous of this support with two reasons.
First of all, it has been proven that arts will last longer than any sports trophies. Take cave paintings of Spain and France. They were painted over 20,000 years ago and still remain as significant works of art by humans. It will benefit people to study arts rather than doing sports; because artworks will last indefinitely, but excelling in sports rely on athletics physical status that won't last more than 30 years. Additionally, studying arts has many benefits for people. For instance, I'm playing classical guitar about 20 years now. I started when I was 10 and playing a musical instrument has been benefited me with numerous advantageous. I have a good amount of confidence since I had to play in public, and it had helped me confront most of the challenges that I had to face during my life. In addition, playing a musical instrument could develop your brain functionality higher. I watched a TED talk program; motivating talks by successful people; about a year ago. It was about how musicians brains work magnificently than others. It helps them to work and connect different parts of their brain and brings harmony in both brain's hemispheres.
Second, investing in arts would improve the public culture as well. Take music festivals and concerts for example. People could hear a variety of music, and their taste could improve significantly. On the other hand, watching sports could agitate people most of the time. They support their team avidly and provoke their rivals with vulgar language. This behaviour isn't healthy. Additionally, the government wouldn't allow women in stadiums, that would direct men's attitude towards using descent languages in public places. For instance, I went to a soccer match a couple of years ago. It was fun at first, cheering and supporting our team. But as soon as we receive a goal, the audience went mad and told awful things to the other team and their supporters. As I mentioned before, this isn't a healthy attitude. But governments could moderate these bad behaviours by sponsoring art exhibitions or concerts.
Sports and arts both have different merits in societies. But supporting sports and laying off arts could hurt the society's balance. Governments should support arts potently to improve society's culture and artistic taste. Besides, arts could ease people's minds and souls.
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 492, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: I'm
...many benefits for people. For instance, Im playing classical guitar about 20 years...
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Line 3, column 366, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: isn't
...ls with vulgar language. This behaviour isnt healthy. Additionally, the government w...
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Line 3, column 409, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: wouldn't
...t healthy. Additionally, the government wouldnt allow women in stadiums, that would dir...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 787, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: isn't
...supporters. As I mentioned before, this isnt a healthy attitude. But governments cou...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
besides, but, first, if, second, so, still, well, for example, for instance, in addition, first of all, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 8.0 15.1003584229 53% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 16.0 9.8082437276 163% => OK
Conjunction : 23.0 13.8261648746 166% => OK
Relative clauses : 5.0 11.0286738351 45% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 39.0 43.0788530466 91% => OK
Preposition: 48.0 52.1666666667 92% => OK
Nominalization: 9.0 8.0752688172 111% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2255.0 1977.66487455 114% => OK
No of words: 437.0 407.700716846 107% => OK
Chars per words: 5.16018306636 4.8611393121 106% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.57214883401 4.48103885553 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.70062441349 2.67179642975 101% => OK
Unique words: 256.0 212.727598566 120% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.585812356979 0.524837075471 112% => OK
syllable_count: 657.0 618.680645161 106% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 16.0 9.59856630824 167% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.51792114695 57% => OK
Conjunction: 7.0 1.86738351254 375% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 3.0 4.94265232975 61% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 31.0 20.6003584229 150% => OK
Sentence length: 14.0 20.1344086022 70% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 39.1455301231 48.9658058833 80% => OK
Chars per sentence: 72.7419354839 100.406767564 72% => OK
Words per sentence: 14.0967741935 20.6045352989 68% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.90322580645 5.45110844103 72% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.5376344086 72% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 20.0 11.8709677419 168% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 3.85842293907 156% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.88709677419 102% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.189631296705 0.236089414692 80% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0469256767182 0.076458572812 61% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0727574239431 0.0737576698707 99% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.124823325408 0.150856017488 83% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0311181830836 0.0645574589148 48% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 9.9 11.7677419355 84% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 65.73 58.1214874552 113% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 7.6 10.1575268817 75% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.06 10.9000537634 111% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.45 8.01818996416 105% => OK
difficult_words: 114.0 86.8835125448 131% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 6.5 10.002688172 65% => OK
gunning_fog: 7.6 10.0537634409 76% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 10.247311828 78% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 78.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 23.5 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.